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Joined: Sep 2015
Posts: 1
Junior Member
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OP
Junior Member
Joined: Sep 2015
Posts: 1 |
It's been a year since he discovered my affair with our neighbor. We have tried to make it work. I want to keep the family together. We have 3 boys. He filed for divorce last month and says he's done. I'm devastated.
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
What can we help you with?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
Can you answer some questions?
1. is the affair over?
2. do you still live next to the OM?
3. is the OM married and if so, does his wife know?
4. has the affair been exposed to your friends and family?
5. what have you done to affair proof your marriage so your husband is protected from a repeat?
6. when was the last time you communicated with the OM or saw him? [in any way]
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 5,860
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Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 5,860 |
It's been a year since he discovered my affair with our neighbor. We have tried to make it work. I want to keep the family together. We have 3 boys. He filed for divorce last month and says he's done. I'm devastated. What have you done to make your BH feel safe with you and that there is NC in place with the OM?
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Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,311
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Joined: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,311 |
Was the affair with the neighbor the only affair you've had?
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Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 31
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Joined: Feb 2015
Posts: 31 |
If it's really over all you can do is move on and hopefully have learned from this horrific life-altering behavior you engaged in. When you do start a relationship with someone else make sure you tell them the truth about why your marriage ended. That would be the honorable thing to do.
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239 |
If it's really over all you can do is move on and hopefully have learned from this horrific life-altering behavior you engaged in. When you do start a relationship with someone else make sure you tell them the truth about why your marriage ended. That would be the honorable thing to do. There is one other option: she could "Plan A" her husband and try to show him that she is willing to end her affair, follow precautions which would prevent a future affair and provide just compensation to her husband.
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4
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Joined: Nov 2010
Posts: 20,439 Likes: 4 |
Can you answer some questions?
1. is the affair over?
2. do you still live next to the OM?
3. is the OM married and if so, does his wife know?
4. has the affair been exposed to your friends and family?
5. what have you done to affair proof your marriage so your husband is protected from a repeat?
6. when was the last time you communicated with the OM or saw him? [in any way] In addition to these, will your BH come here to MB? Please read this and listen to the radio clips. What is Just Compensation
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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