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Really I am not either. I know that she has lost her way. She has lost who she is. I do feel sorrow. It pains me to see her like this.
BH 34 (me) WS 31 / OM 44 3 children 12/7/angel Married 13y D-Day 9/21/2015
Exposed/Separated Plan A (Almost in recovery)
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Really I am not either. I know that she has lost her way. She has lost who she is. I do feel sorrow. It pains me to see her like this. I feel your pain, I feel my WW is losing everything that made her a great woman. She used to protect the kids with her life and now let's strangers touch our little one on the head. Before the affair she would get really defensive if anyone tried to attempt to touch them without your permission. Some were in there there has to be the woman the children and I love so dearly.
Last edited by RonClark; 10/07/15 01:06 PM.
BH 34 D-Day- 6/2015 Married 4 years DD 11 and 4 DS 1 Plan A+Exposure
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Really I am not either. I know that she has lost her way. She has lost who she is. I do feel sorrow. It pains me to see her like this. I feel your pain, I feel my WW is losing everything that made her a great woman. She used to protect the kids with her life and now let's strangers touch our little one on the head. Before the affair she would get really defensive if anyone tried to attempt to touch them without your permission. Some were in there there has to be the woman the children and I love so dearly. My question is, why is human psychology so complicated? How can someone change so fast and become so heartless?
BH 34 (me) WS 31 / OM 44 3 children 12/7/angel Married 13y D-Day 9/21/2015
Exposed/Separated Plan A (Almost in recovery)
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Surprising enough, her reply was rather hateful and rude. If you go to Plan B but you are able to read your WS's response, you're not doing it right.
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Surprising enough, her reply was rather hateful and rude. If you go to Plan B but you are able to read your WS's response, you're not doing it right. I just sent her the letter in an email. It was a very fast reply. I wonder if she even ready it. Her mother is my POC if I need to tell her something, and my Step mother is her POC. I'm with you though Markos! I shouldn't have ever opened the reply. I did not respond. I really think I need to have a different POC then her mother. I have evidence that says her mother was trying to keep me away from learning about the affair. Which brings up a question. Should I send her the screenshots of the evidence? ***EDIT***
Last edited by Ariel; 10/07/15 07:03 PM. Reason: Removing links
BH 34 (me) WS 31 / OM 44 3 children 12/7/angel Married 13y D-Day 9/21/2015
Exposed/Separated Plan A (Almost in recovery)
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If the guy has threatened you, you should see a lawyer and get a restraining order filed against him. That will keep him away from you and possibly your wife as well! If he is becoming threatening, that is just ideal because so much can be done against him legally. Can I actually get one against him? Really? That would be the best thing that I could imagine. I'm looking at this post, and I don't understand why you are asking me - see a lawyer!!!!
If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app! Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8. Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010 If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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A second reminder not to post personal details on the forum.
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A second reminder not to post personal details on the forum. I apologize, I removed names.
BH 34 (me) WS 31 / OM 44 3 children 12/7/angel Married 13y D-Day 9/21/2015
Exposed/Separated Plan A (Almost in recovery)
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If the guy has threatened you, you should see a lawyer and get a restraining order filed against him. That will keep him away from you and possibly your wife as well! If he is becoming threatening, that is just ideal because so much can be done against him legally. Can I actually get one against him? Really? That would be the best thing that I could imagine. I'm looking at this post, and I don't understand why you are asking me - see a lawyer!!!! Yeah good point!
Last edited by ManKeepingHisFam; 10/07/15 10:57 PM.
BH 34 (me) WS 31 / OM 44 3 children 12/7/angel Married 13y D-Day 9/21/2015
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So I am really starting to not like this girl. Found out today, after speaking with the police and a friend who tipped me off, my WW has submitted an affidavit stating that she was not sleeping around on me, that I found her in my home (not his) and I flipped out and attacked her and threw her out (completely false). Now I have 2 warrants back home. I have sense cleared my name and proven my innocence with the DA. But still, WOW!
BH 34 (me) WS 31 / OM 44 3 children 12/7/angel Married 13y D-Day 9/21/2015
Exposed/Separated Plan A (Almost in recovery)
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So I am really starting to not like this girl. Found out today, after speaking with the police and a friend who tipped me off, my WW has submitted an affidavit stating that she was not sleeping around on me, that I found her in my home (not his) and I flipped out and attacked her and threw her out (completely false). Now I have 2 warrants back home. I have sense cleared my name and proven my innocence with the DA. But still, WOW! It's really sad to what lengths a WS will go to cover there tracks. I been reading the threads here I am shocked what happens, but looking at from the point of view there addicted it makes more since and makes it easier at least fo me to look past what there doing and leaving it open for recovery. Go read wifedivorcing thread, you know he's my hero for what's he's been through. Hang in there
BH 34 D-Day- 6/2015 Married 4 years DD 11 and 4 DS 1 Plan A+Exposure
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So I am really starting to not like this girl. Found out today, after speaking with the police and a friend who tipped me off, my WW has submitted an affidavit stating that she was not sleeping around on me, that I found her in my home (not his) and I flipped out and attacked her and threw her out (completely false). Now I have 2 warrants back home. I have sense cleared my name and proven my innocence with the DA. But still, WOW! It's really sad to what lengths a WS will go to cover there tracks. I been reading the threads here I am shocked what happens, but looking at from the point of view there addicted it makes more since and makes it easier at least fo me to look past what there doing and leaving it open for recovery. Go read wifedivorcing thread, you know he's my hero for what's he's been through. Hang in there This is why I have hope! My problem though is that I truly think she needs grief counseling and a mental evaluation. I'm not trying to be rude or ugly, I just don't see the mother and wife I knew. Something inside of her has snapped. But your story gives me hope that even the impossible is possible.
BH 34 (me) WS 31 / OM 44 3 children 12/7/angel Married 13y D-Day 9/21/2015
Exposed/Separated Plan A (Almost in recovery)
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My problem though is that I truly think she needs grief counseling and a mental evaluation. Please tell us you have not said anything like this to her.
3 adult children Divorced - he was a serial adulterer Now remarried, thank you MB (formerly lied_to_again)
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My problem though is that I truly think she needs grief counseling and a mental evaluation. I sure hope you did not tell this to her, it's a huge love buster
BH 34 D-Day- 6/2015 Married 4 years DD 11 and 4 DS 1 Plan A+Exposure
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My problem though is that I truly think she needs grief counseling and a mental evaluation. Please tell us you have not said anything like this to her. No I haven't. But it is a very real statement. I love the woman to death, but we lost a son 4 years ago in September and she is mourning over him nearly as much today as the day he passed. Just before this affair came to light (around his birthday) she told me that it feels like he dies again and again and all she wants is to sleep (her words). I'm not saying she is wrong or that her feelings are not justified, I'm saying she needs help. When she was lying there in bed, I would just hold her, dry her tears, whisper loving words, and offer to do anything she needed. She would supplement her depression meds with pot. This numbed the pain.
BH 34 (me) WS 31 / OM 44 3 children 12/7/angel Married 13y D-Day 9/21/2015
Exposed/Separated Plan A (Almost in recovery)
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My problem though is that I truly think she needs grief counseling and a mental evaluation. Please tell us you have not said anything like this to her. No I haven't. But it is a very real statement. I love the woman to death, but we lost a son 4 years ago in September and she is mourning over him nearly as much today as the day he passed. Just before this affair came to light (around his birthday) she told me that it feels like he dies again and again and all she wants is to sleep (her words). I'm not saying she is wrong or that her feelings are not justified, I'm saying she needs help. When she was lying there in bed, I would just hold her, dry her tears, whisper loving words, and offer to do anything she needed. She would supplement her depression meds with pot. This numbed the pain. Did I say something wrong?
BH 34 (me) WS 31 / OM 44 3 children 12/7/angel Married 13y D-Day 9/21/2015
Exposed/Separated Plan A (Almost in recovery)
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Well I have more bad news. The landlord has evicted her from the house because she hasn't paid the rent and she hasn't stayed there since the affair started. The children that she was supposed to be watching for her cousin has been taken by the department of human resources. My landlord has been keeping in the loop. That and I have been in touch with her cousin. No communication between her and I. Apparently she put a sworn statement that said I beat her up the day I caught her in bed with him and twisted the facts around to say that she was not at his house but my own. My mother-in-law is also an board with this and stated that she with testify for her. Also this weekend while she was moving her stuff out, I sent my mother there (bad idea) to get my stuff out. Long story short, cops were called and I was told via phone that I could only get out my male things and everything else she would have to store until the divorce. Well, she left quite a few things in the house and throw somethings in the pool which damaged the liner. The landlord is pressing charges on her for malicious vandalism. Also I have cleared my name for the assault charges by having a sworn statement from one of her friends that said she lied, now the DA is pressing charges on her for falsifying a police statement.
This is getting out of hand! I have not spoken with her but I have heard that she is saying I have been abusing her for years.
BH 34 (me) WS 31 / OM 44 3 children 12/7/angel Married 13y D-Day 9/21/2015
Exposed/Separated Plan A (Almost in recovery)
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You need to get an attorney yesterday!!!!! What state are you in?
What you say is happening doesn't make any sense with "sworn statements", did she file a police report for assault, a RO/PO?
Having your name cleared of assault charges by a sworn statement, huh?
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You need to get an attorney yesterday!!!!! What state are you in? I agree... I am flat broke but I am working on it What you say is happening doesn't make any sense with "sworn statements", did she file a police report for assault, a RO/PO? She went to the police station and under oath wrote them her statement. Having your name cleared of assault charges by a sworn statement, huh? This was several days ago. To be honest, I'm not sure if I'm really cleared or not but the DA I spoke with, said they were going to drop my charges and that they were looking at her.
BH 34 (me) WS 31 / OM 44 3 children 12/7/angel Married 13y D-Day 9/21/2015
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you need an attorney.
These legal troubles will follow you, background checks for jobs, etc. Get ahead of them now! This is your future and the futures of your children, PROTECT IT.
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