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Originally Posted By: Alwayslookingup
Well...I sent the plan B letter to my WS Facebook friends. OMG...WS is livid...sent me a private msg as well as OW...she didn't know he was married til a lil while ago. I can't say if it ends things but my letter was quite revealing...to include my WS history of domestic violence. She was very apologetic. Acknowledged it as sin. Not sure if it will result in a split....but hoping. How long does it take before reality truly sets in? OW also deleted her FB acct almost immediately.

You sent the Plan B Letter to his Facebook friends? Why would you send the Plan B Letter to his friends?

What did your letter say? Did you follow the Plan B template?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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Also, how did your WH get a message to you? I thought you were going to get an IM? I thought you had him blocked?

Have you exposed on OW's side yet?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



BrainHurts #2874060 01/10/16 08:43 PM
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I sent the suggested EXPOSURE 101 letter template tailored to my style. My personal FB is dark. But in order to get a hold of my WS FB friends list I created a fake acct to gain access. While I was in middle of sending out my letter via private FB msg people were telling him and OW.

Last edited by Alwayslookingup; 01/10/16 08:50 PM.

BW, me - 44
WH - 47
Married 2.5yrs
EA 6-2015 estimate
PA 9-2015 estimate
D-day 11-22-2015
WH filed divorce 11-23-2015
Exposure 1-10-2016
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So he was able to private msg me. Now my fake acct and my personal acct are completely deactivated and dark.


BW, me - 44
WH - 47
Married 2.5yrs
EA 6-2015 estimate
PA 9-2015 estimate
D-day 11-22-2015
WH filed divorce 11-23-2015
Exposure 1-10-2016
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I sent whatever letter is suggested on this site for FB. ...I'm not sure what you call it.

Last edited by Alwayslookingup; 01/10/16 08:51 PM.

BW, me - 44
WH - 47
Married 2.5yrs
EA 6-2015 estimate
PA 9-2015 estimate
D-day 11-22-2015
WH filed divorce 11-23-2015
Exposure 1-10-2016
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The exposure letter?


BW, me - 44
WH - 47
Married 2.5yrs
EA 6-2015 estimate
PA 9-2015 estimate
D-day 11-22-2015
WH filed divorce 11-23-2015
Exposure 1-10-2016
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My letter exposed the affair to their friends.


BW, me - 44
WH - 47
Married 2.5yrs
EA 6-2015 estimate
PA 9-2015 estimate
D-day 11-22-2015
WH filed divorce 11-23-2015
Exposure 1-10-2016
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Now I'm freakin out cuz he was PISSED and she deleted her FB acct. Even if temporarily.


BW, me - 44
WH - 47
Married 2.5yrs
EA 6-2015 estimate
PA 9-2015 estimate
D-day 11-22-2015
WH filed divorce 11-23-2015
Exposure 1-10-2016
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I sent a combination of the Exposure 101 templates.


BW, me - 44
WH - 47
Married 2.5yrs
EA 6-2015 estimate
PA 9-2015 estimate
D-day 11-22-2015
WH filed divorce 11-23-2015
Exposure 1-10-2016
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You did the right thing. Him freaking out is the exposure working. This is what you WANT to happen. The angrier the WS, the more effective the exposure.


BW-27
FWH-31
DS-6
Married several years
D-Day- 11/22/13
Plan A+Exposure
NC+Beginning of Recovery-04/2014

In Recovery and happier and more in love than ever
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Originally Posted By: Alwayslookingup
My letter exposed the affair to their friends.

Ok so you sent the exposure letter and not the Plan B letter.
I thought you had already exposed on his side??

So who did you expose to on her side? Any family?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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He's intent on going thru with the divorce. He unfriended the fake FB acct. She deleted hers.


BW, me - 44
WH - 47
Married 2.5yrs
EA 6-2015 estimate
PA 9-2015 estimate
D-day 11-22-2015
WH filed divorce 11-23-2015
Exposure 1-10-2016
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Not sure if this backfired. He's angry and more intent that we be done. But no where did WS say he loved her etc...


BW, me - 44
WH - 47
Married 2.5yrs
EA 6-2015 estimate
PA 9-2015 estimate
D-day 11-22-2015
WH filed divorce 11-23-2015
Exposure 1-10-2016
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I did the exposure to only their coworkers...I did not send the plan b letter to them...I sent the exposure letter to their coworkers...I do not have any contact info for the OW family....best I could do was expose to his family and their shared coworkers.


BW, me - 44
WH - 47
Married 2.5yrs
EA 6-2015 estimate
PA 9-2015 estimate
D-day 11-22-2015
WH filed divorce 11-23-2015
Exposure 1-10-2016
Joined: Dec 2015
Posts: 428
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I feel GREAT....very empowered


BW, me - 44
WH - 47
Married 2.5yrs
EA 6-2015 estimate
PA 9-2015 estimate
D-day 11-22-2015
WH filed divorce 11-23-2015
Exposure 1-10-2016
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 6,108
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Originally Posted By: Alwayslookingup
We knew each other over a year before we got married...he is 47 and I am 43...I have a son from a previous marriage...he has no children. I am his 3rd marriage and he is my 2nd. Prior..he was a drug and alcohol addict for 25yrs...he aged out of foster care as a child...and he is 5yrs sober. We were separated in Feb 2015 because I filed a restraining order due to punching holes in doors and breaking one door in half. He admitted during dating that he cheated on his previous wives...but when he got sober he became a born again Christian and he would never go against Gods commandment. I have never had an affair.


Given you had been married less than two years before your violent serial cheating husband walked away, I would not fight this divorce. Your H is not good marriage material given his track record. I hope your child is not a minor and is exposed to him. Sorry but I recommend you cut your losses.

Last edited by black_raven; 01/10/16 09:50 PM.

BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011




Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.

We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
black_raven #2874077 01/10/16 10:05 PM
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I don't disagree


BW, me - 44
WH - 47
Married 2.5yrs
EA 6-2015 estimate
PA 9-2015 estimate
D-day 11-22-2015
WH filed divorce 11-23-2015
Exposure 1-10-2016
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Originally Posted By: Alwayslookingup
I feel GREAT....very empowered

Good job on finally exposing.

Now I would get into a dark Plan B and no more contact. Have you seen a lawyer yet? Is the RO still active?

The angrier they are is a sign of a direct hit on exposure.


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



BrainHurts #2874088 01/11/16 08:04 AM
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I have filed my response to the divorce with aid of an atty. Plan b has been in effect...I just finally got up nerve for exposure. He is mad...she is only pissed cuz I outed her and created chaos with her coworkers...but while I was copying and pasting to friends list WS and OW started private messaging me. So there was some contact yesterday. She is apologetic...didn't know WS was married...but now she knows he has an active RO...til next month. It might not chg much because while she didn't know in beginning he was married she does now and 'can't help how she feels about him'....yuck.


BW, me - 44
WH - 47
Married 2.5yrs
EA 6-2015 estimate
PA 9-2015 estimate
D-day 11-22-2015
WH filed divorce 11-23-2015
Exposure 1-10-2016
Joined: Dec 2015
Posts: 428
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WS said he knew of letter to his mom...now the work exposure letter that he is starting to hate me...that divorce can't soon enough..that if OW leaves him we will still be divorced...interesting thing about the few exchanges on private message is that no where did he say how HE felt about her...only how he didn't believe ME about reconciliation. Odd. No where did either mention they loved each other. WS still blames me for everything. Lame. But overall was an interesting exchange between WS and OW...to me..OW is weak link. She deleted her FB page immediately. Probably only temporary...but she got scared and deleted it nonetheless. She was commenting to me from WS FB. I feel it was humiliating to both but it seems more for her. Not sure this will change a darn thing other than the lies my WS was telling to all his coworkers was exposed. But I feel good for getting the truth out there.


BW, me - 44
WH - 47
Married 2.5yrs
EA 6-2015 estimate
PA 9-2015 estimate
D-day 11-22-2015
WH filed divorce 11-23-2015
Exposure 1-10-2016
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