Dear IsIt2Late,<P>Just wondering how the counseling went...<P>BrokenButNotCrushed<P>

I cried when I read this... how I wish that my H and I could have somehow handled things differently... at this point, it almost seems too late... did I say almost? I should say that yes, it is too late... he's moving out for the last and final time. We are just trying to handle this divorce with some dignity and without hurting each other further, and we hope (and pray) that somehow we can be in the very small group of couples who actually end up as friends...<P>But... this was truly beautiful... I wish you and your wife SO MUCH HAPPINESS for the REST OF YOUR LIVES!!<P>~Sheryl<p>[This message has been edited by new_beginning (edited March 18, 2000).]

Outstanding message. I received a great blessing from it, and am sure others have as well. Thank you for sharing. Your faith in God is the key to your success in restoring your marriage, undoubtedly. He is always here for us, we just need to ask for His help. Luke 1:37 (NKJV) <B>"For with God nothing will be impossible"</B>. <BR>

Thank you so much for your post. It just so happened that I was showing my husband this site and we pulled up your story and read it together. WOW - what an eye opener for him. You described so many of my own feelings that I have been try desperately to share with my H and he just didn't seem to understand but I truly think he does now. I asked him how he felt after reading it and he said it made him very sad.<P>Thanks again for sharing your story.

Hi there<BR>what an inspiration you are to us all.<P>i wish i could forgive my H the way you have forgiven your W it is so hard to get over the bitterness for me, it haunts me every day and reading your posts lightnes my heart a little but i feel i cannot pray because in the beginning i said novenas to the sacred heart and promised publication which i did a couple of times maybe hoping for miracles but i still feel this bitterness and hurt and i would be glad if you get the time to read my story which was posted on march 17th and maybe give me some hope<BR>thanks a lot<P><P>------------------<BR>Gabe

Dear RHawkins,<P>I'm glad that my story impacted your husband! Please also see my post entitled, 'Truths I learned from my wife's affair.' There are principles in it that may help both of you to better understand and cope.<P>The key element that makes most affairs possible is deception. Even after confessing to you, your H is still operating under many deceptions, especially emotionally. That's at least part of why his emotions aren't what you'd want them to be, or what they should be.<P>My own W was somewhat smug when she first confessed. The high from the affair was so overpowering that even three years after the affair ended, she had an attitude of 'I knew that romance novel type love was out there, and I was right, but I chose to do the right thing anyway.' <P>It took awhile before I was able to chip away at the lies Satan had blissfully fed her. It will take awhile for you, too. But hopefully the process has started. Keep posting at this site. There is a great deal of collective wisdom here, as well as the willingness to help. <P>Best Wishes,<P>BrokenButNotCrushed<BR>

Dear Gabe,<P>It sounds like you have had just a terrible time. I'm sorry you have suffered so much, both before and after the affair.<P>We can only do what we know to do. If we haven't heard something, it isn't our fault. While there are a number of things that I believe caused my recovery to be unusually fast, there is one that stands out above the rest...<P>I know God.<P>I don't mean that I was taught about Him as a child, or that I say a few prayers in times of distress. I mean that I have an ongoing relationship with the One who created all things.<P>I realize you may have been taught that this is not possible. I was raised Jewish, and could have not been more surprised when I learned for myself, 14 years ago, that Jesus is Lord! But once I learned the truth, I gave my life to Him, and day by day I have grown to understand His ways more and more.<P>I read your post and realized you do not know Him. I can't even imagine coping with the pain I endured if I did not have Him to lean on.<P>There are many things you will need to do to get your life back on the right road. Some will be very difficult, and take a long time to work out. But this first step is the most important, and all it takes is a few minutes of heartfelt prayer:<P>"Dear Heavenly Father,<P>I know that I am a sinner, and that I have done much to displease you. But I believe You sent Your Son, Jesus, to die on a cross to pay the price for my sins. I accept your forgiveness, and believe that through His death, I can be born anew. Please send Your Holy Spirit to live in me, and to guide me through the all the days ahead. <P>In Jesus' name,<P>Amen."<P>This prayer, when prayed earnestly, believing, will start you down a new road in life. Please let me know if you pray it, and I will help you with the steps that follow.<P>There is relief from all the hurts of the past, and the answer lies not within us, but in Him.<P>I have found peace, not by escaping the pain of my wife's infidelity, but by walking through it with His help. I hope that you, too, will find His peace.<P>BrokenButNotCrushed<P><BR>

I don't know what to say. Your story brought tears to because it hit so close. There were a few differences, I found about my wifes affair shortly after it started. It was shorter but recently ended. That was last August and your right it does get better with time but when you see a story like yours it will hit home. I don't feel the pain of the affair or have any bad feelings toward her but just feel amazing moved, lucky to have her, and sad I almost lost her.<P> I believe both your marriage and mine are going to go places like never before. <P> Wow, thank you, I did a little reassurance and you gave it to me.<P>Wow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Dear IsIt2Late,<BR>Just wondering how the counseling went...<P>BrokenButNotCrushed<P>-I just thought I would re-post your response since there are so many replies here. <P>After saying that she would try to find a counselor for us since she does want to go to one of my choosing, she still has not made any calls to even try to find one. It has been a week and half since she said this. <P>May the Lord Bless You and Keep You,<BR>John

Here's another success Story.<P>Jo

Dear Derby,<BR> I know what you mean. My H was a good Christian man, who often had said,"There's no excuse for people to have an affair. They should just run away from the temptation." Well, I guess Satan has a way of attacking in areas where people think they are strong. Anyway, my H won't listen to the idea that the passion is so strong witn OW because it is in secret and forbidden. He is convinced that she is the love of his life, because"he has never felt passion like that with anyone."<BR>

Broken, I am looking for your post "Truths I have Learned", and can't seem to find it------I'm not totally dense, but could you help?<P>Faith N Him