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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> How is your therapy going? </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Well, we don't go anymore. But we didn't quit. We went until she told us NOT to come back anymore.
Our therapist actually cried on our last visit. She said that most people are not willing to do the hard work that we did. Most drop out and don't continue. Then a few years down the line they call her again.
I'll never forget, I dealt with a lot of shame and beat myself up. All of my answers at first were "I don't know". On that final visit she told me how she had seen me change and grown over the two years.
She told us to go and hold our heads up high.
There are times that I still feel I could benefit for therapy. We don't have any major problems. But, we got all the tools we need. We know what to do. And Lord knows, I have a library as big as any therapist.
It is a journey always in progress...and you never really arrive.
I think the real key is staying aware. Not getting to comfortable and in a rut..not letting the old habits or what came natural for so many years creep back in.
Susan
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No, I don't think we are in any danger, Pepper. Should the angry outbursts turn into violent outbursts you can gar-own-tee that 911 will be called. Speaking of chewing and how it was getting on your nerves, Susan. My husband is driving me crazy with rattling his ice around in his glass and then slamming it on the counter. I just want to BOP him when he does that. The last time I tried to acknowledge my husband's efforts...he blew me off. It was about work and I was telling him how proud I was of him and all that. He blew me off. Later he told me that (in so many words) that he didn't appreciate the compliment or acknowledgement because he knew he wasn't working as hard as he thought he should. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" /> He and I both have really low self esteem. Yes, I will admit, I've got a WHOLE FREAKING TRUCKLOAD of resentments built up. I know he does. Hopefully we will work through those during therapy. sel
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Susan~~~ Have you seen the Movie Chicago??? I think you said you had. Remember the wife who fired "two warning shots ~~~~~ into his head" ... because he was POPPIN' his gum!! I can relate! LOL </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">He doesn't chew gum... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> sticks to his dentures... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> JUST KIDDING!!!! No! and I want to see it. Our "men" are having a men's night out going to a wildlife supper (YUCK! can you relate to that Sel?) this Thursday night, so we are having a girls night too. I wanted to go to Chicago...but, my friend floosy Lucy has already been, so they all want to get Chinese take-out and just chat... Have you seen Two Weeks Notice? ...remember Sandra Bullock ordering all that Chinese food for one??? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> (that will be me <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> )
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">My husband is driving me crazy with rattling his ice around in his glass and then slamming it on the counter. I just want to BOP him when he does that. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">It is all a part of the built up resentments, Honey. Now it doesn't even bother me when my hubby farts... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Later he told me that (in so many words) that he didn't appreciate the compliment or acknowledgement because he knew he wasn't working as hard as he thought he should. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Well, that is his problem to deal with not yours. You did the right thing.
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Sel~~~ You know I like to give practical advice whenever I can.... This ice in the glass business ..... Next time he doesn't do this annoying habit .... sit on his lap, take a little ice from his glass and rub it on your throat, then down your chest .... and say."Mr. Sel ~~~ you have been so respectful with this ice today. You didn't rattle my nerves with all that noise! Thank YOU!" ... Then put a little ice in your mouth and pass it into his mouth. Tell him when he doesn't rattle his ice/slam his glass <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> you are soooo grateful. <small>[ March 03, 2003, 05:09 PM: Message edited by: Pepperband ]</small>
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shiver....shiver... Please wait until a warm day...I'm going to build a fire in my fireplace just thinkin' 'bout this! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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My advice...don't give him any damn ice! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Start serving him milk...or plain tea no ice. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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Susan~ LOL! Farts have never bothered me! The ice is driving me crazy. It's not really the ice (although the way he *chinks* the ice around in his glass to get EVERY LAST LITTLE BITTY DROP of liquid as cold as possible DOES get on my nerves)...it's the WAY he sets his glass down <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" /> . Oh, Lordy, would you just listen to me....I'm not gettin' nit-picky or anything am I? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> Good advice, Pepper, for a second there I thought you were going to suggest me doing something else with the ice. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> sel <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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