Hi SugarCane-
If one doesn’t hire Steve- where exactly would I start with my husband.
Read first?
Is there a best order of books?
Fill out questionnaires first?
There is a LOT of info on here & in the books
Thank you!
Welcome to MB. Could you share with us about why you filed for divorce?
I call myself a singlewife. My kids call him that person who pretends to be married to you.
He lied about a lot of health issues he has. He has had severe ED and therefore struggled to be intimate from the get go. Anything intimate quickly got to be nothing -refused any attempt When I wanted to keep trying. I don’t want to live a completely sexless and affection less life.
He also has extremely high BP and low testosterone but stopped going to Dr to fix any of his health issues. For a while I had to live in constant fear Myself or a child was going to find him dead.
He just went back to Dr in Jan.
I could disappear for weeks before he might notice honestly. We don’t have a life together or am I given any attention.
When I have asked for more attention or seem to needy- it has caused DJ on his part.
It frustrates me cause sometimes he will go out or do something but I lost my desire to ask much because of the DJ’s. Which then makes him act like he doesn’t get it cause he will give me a attention if I ask but WILL not ever pursue me. Other than We talk daily about life issues.
He really doesn’t want to be part of life with kids or my family or people- if he shows up he doesn’t really speak.
I understand being introverted but he isn’t like this other places.
He also refuses to let me do anything for him- get him drink of water? No… can I rub your back, he says receiving any love from me makes him feel guilty? So he lives his life making sure I can do nothing for him & that he doesn’t need me at all.
He isn’t angry or demanding… very passive. He has no interest in where I go, what I do, who I see. It’s like I’m invisible.
I’m tired of it. If I divorced- I really will only notice his absence once and a while at first. Nothing else would change. Marriage isn’t suppose to be like that.
It’s why I could file but keep him in the house- he says he doesn’t want to divorce but he doesn’t ever get in the way of me living my life. There is no visible anger or sadness- he says he will just do whatever I want.
He has attempted to speak to me more now and says he still loves me deeply?- he just doesn’t know how to have a relationship. He claims to be willing to do anything.
I hope that all makes sense.