Everyone around me, here at home tells me to just give up. My counselor says to let her go, my psychiatrist tells me to let her go, my mom tells me today she doesn't want to hear anymore about what GOD is telling me about saving our marriage. She just want's me to forget it, and get on with my life. The only people that are supportive and tell me to hang on are the people here at this site, and my only true friend here at home. He keeps telling me he doesn't know how it will happen, or when, but he truly believes she and I will get back together SOON!. I can't take all this negativity and lack of support from everyone around me, especially my wife. I haven't heard from her in 3 days. My daughter spent the night with My mom last night and is staying with me tonight, and going to church with me tomorrow. My wife is supposed to be here sometime tomorrow afternoon to pick our daughter up. I don't know what to do, or to say to her. GOD wants me to hold on, and everyone around me says move on and forget about her and saving our marriage. I can't fight anymore. Everyone is teling me not to fight and they are not sure GOD is speaking to me. I believe with all my heart that HE is, but even my own family doesn't want to hear that or anything else about how I dream of saving my marriage. I just want to give up and just live for my daughter and for me. It seems nothing else will happen the way GOD tells me it will, or I hope and pray that it will. I can't fight something I can't see and she is so drawn to.<BR>Thank everyone here for your love and support, but I just don't see any hope for this marriage or this family. Please continue to pray that GOD will heal me and give me a life filled with happiness, joy, and love. I will not try another relationship and will always wear this wedding ring. But it seems I will be living alone except for the nights my daughter is allowed to stay with me.<BR>I love you all in Christ Jesus.<BR>Lone_Knight.<BR>

Dear Lone Knight, my heart goes out to you....I have been fighting similar feelings all week.....thoughts of just throwing the towel in. But, one thing I do know is right, wait on the Lord. It is okay for you to quit trying on your own to make this all happen. I sometimes feel that if I let up on praying, that the ground I've gained will be lost. I also know that the enemy wants us to be defeated....to give up on God, to lose our faith. We need to give it to God and "let" him take care of it all. As for my own situation, I am reluctant to make decisions unless I am absolutely sure. I am now asking the Lord to let me know that he is the only one who can do anything about my situation. I tell him that I trust him to restore joy to me. When I am able to do this and focus on the Lord, I am less concerned with my life. This seems silly, but at this point is when things change. You know the struggle I am going through, I would just advise you to put your marriage fully in the Lord's hands and ask him to direct your life, to make you whole, to pour his love out on you. This is not giving up, more like giving in and letting more capable hands take care of it all. I have a job where I solve problems and make decisions. This has been one of the most important problems and I have to accept that fixing it will never be done in my power. My job, and your job, is to listen to the Lord and to let him work out his plan in our life. Neither of us know what he has planned for our lives, but we do know (according to his word) that these plans are for our good. I may not be making any sense, but I perceive that you (like me) are trying to fix things on your own. Not that we do not have a place in all of this, but that place is to listen to the Lord and allow him to direct our steps. I love the Lord, I pray and talk to the Lord as though he were my best friend. And yet, I know that what would truly satisfy the longing of my soul is to have more of his presence. No person, job, etc. can ever fill my empty places. Only Jesus can and he is willing. I will be praying for you, do not give up, just give it up to the Lord and go on with living. Enjoy your precious daughter..... Lord, please comfort and touch Lone Knight at this moment, fill him with your peace, let him know that you are standing ready to lift the burden, that he is not abandoning his hopes for his marriage, that he is just turning this most difficult task over to you. With your capable hands, all things are possible. Lord, I ask that you would pour the oil of joy upon him. That you, Father, would give him beauty for ashes. We thank you Lord, because you are a mighty God and merciful unto all. We ask Father, that you would soften the heart of Lone Knight's wife, that you would pull the scales from her eyes, and we ask Lord, that in your perfect time you would restore all that the locusts have eaten to Lone Knight. We praise your name as you begin to show Lone Knight exactly what you want him to do and where you want him to stand. We ask that every lie of the enemy would fall on deaf ears, that Lone Knight would hear only you and the words you wish him to hear. We praise your name, Father, that you will come quickly and dry his tears, restore his joy, and mend his heart. IJN Amen.

Lone Knight,<P>Thank you for the prayer on my thread. It is so wonderful to reach out and have someone respond in such a beautiful way. <P>As I read through this topic, I feel I know much of the pain and concern you have. One thing we must all cling to is to focus on Jesus Christ. All our well-meaning friends, Drs., and familiy members are sincere, I'm sure. However, I keep telling mine that I am staying close to the Lord, as I want no mistakes at this time of my life. I also tell them, I can only deal with me, God must deal with my H. My daughter, 27, says now, although she does not agree with me about H, she does have great respect for what I am doing. As far as the clinical depression goes, I've dealt with it for 19 years. Dosage has varied, but I'm not ready to stop altogether. During marriage, dosage dropped, but I couldn't stop altogether. Now, I'm trying herbals, (St. John's Wort with Kava, and L-5HTP.) Both have helped, and perhaps sometime, I can drop medicine. Yes, God can raise our seretonin level, and I certainly am open to that. My sister, a nurse, often says I need to get off the anti-dep. meds. I ask her if she would tell a heart patient to drop his meds. What I am saying is, Don't punish yourself about these things. Be glad God has provided knowledge, and just keep focusing on Him. I vary my herbals depending on what the day looks like.<P>Today, I had bad feelings. I'm sure this was because it was my turn for a Special at the church where I lead music. My H wanted to leave there and find a more spititual church a year ago, and I refused. Simply ignored Ephesians. I've asked forgiveness, but now am in a financial bind, and need the money.<BR>I did tell him that I would leave immediately if and when he returns. Today I felt I could not be by myself in this city. Son will likely be in Army soon, and I'll have no family here. Daughter and sister are far away, and urging me to move there. My h would like me to stay here for a while. ???<BR>D will be final in 60 days, if not pulled from file. I am still looking to God for that.<P>The Harley's book has been very helpful, and I also use Restore Ministries materials. That has helped also. I recommend both highly for a strengthened stand. I've found these comforting even when others scoff.<P>Hang in, and remember, "Weeping lasts for a night, but Joy cometh in the morning."-Bible<P>Lord, be our strenght and comfort. Help us to understand the steps we should take, and have discernment about others' comments.<BR>We praise you for your power, and care, and know we can trust you!!!<P>Committed

Onedayatatime and Committed;<P>I thank both of you for your words and encouragement, as well as the encouragement of everyone that has responded to my ramblings. I thank GOD for this site, and pray for all the requests here daily. Often several times a day, in addition to the prayers for my marriage. I would love to obtain copies of several of the books here. But the way my wife has left our finances, 300 in overdrafts, I can't afford to purchase them at this time. I currently have no refridgerator, no washer, no dryer and no food in the house, and no money. My paycheck doesnt' arrive until Wednesday this week, and it is already gone with the overdraft account at our bank. God will bless Me, when he feels I am ready to receive His blessings in all things. And even though I am facing dire times, I can do ALL things through Christ Who strengthens Me. GOD continually teaches me in bible study, prayer and thoughts, that He IS with Me, He IS trying to save our marrriage, adn my wife and I will be reunited one day soon, but in HIS time and not before. My wife came over today to pick up our daughter, and we had another HUGE fight. My mother hates to hear me talk about what GOD says and that I believe GOD is saving our marriage. I know it causes her pain when I call her and tell her what my wife has done to me, the finances and everything else, then she says I am obsessing with the marriage. Maybe I am, but I truly believe GOD is telling me not to give up and to fight however I can. He believes in us, I still believe in us, but no one else, especially my wife don't believe it, or choose to see it. My mom says she can't help me anymore because it hurts her, and she thinks I am rejecting her assistance. I really am not, but again, communication was never really something I have been proficient at. I hooked up my old answering machine because I have reached the point in my depression that I hate, rather dread to answer the phone. Mom has called twice but I don't have the heart to pick up, or to call her. There are other things I can type, but this post is long enough as it is.... Thank both of you for everything. But it's hard for me to hold on to hope when everyone is fighting so hard to get me to stop believing or trying to save a marriage I KNOW in my heart GOD wants restored. But no one around me wants to see that, or hear me say it. I'm just not going to understand what they mean, and they won't ever understand what I feel, what I believe and the conviction I am under from GOD to save this marriage. I can't fight anymore. I either reject everyone around Me, or I reject GOD or I reject everything and just exist. I'm lost, trying to find my way. I went to the altar at church today to pray and to ask for GOD to help me. Surrendering all to Him. Then when my wife came over today I took it all back on my shoulders and drove her further away. I can't talk to her without making her want to run away. If I dont' talk to her at all, she will think I have given up and move on with her life anyway, but everyone tells me I can't worry about that either.... I'm about to pull out all my hair.<BR>Lone_Knight

Lone_Knight,<P>Believe me when I say that almost everyone here has been where you are right now tonight. We have felt, or are feeling what you are feeling. The hurt is too much to bear, the empty feeling, the fear, the unbearable sense of loss, the loneliness, it feels like someone ripped you right down the middle, and the devil is telling you it would feel better to just die.<P>For the first two months after my wife filed for her divorce, I was not fit to even drive a car and had to depend on our older daughter to drive me around. It does get better, but it takes time and prayer. If you honestly believe that God is calling you to stand for your marriage, then listen to God.<P>If people you talk to, whether family or friends cannot understand or accept this then don't talk to them about it. Come here to talk about it, find others that do understand what you are doing, or keep it between you and God. If you continue to try and make others understand and accept this you will only continue to hurt, frustrate and discourage both you and them.<P>I was several months into standing for my marriage before discussing it to any extent with anyone. By then I was able to explain enough of what I was doing that a few chosen family members and friends could accept and support, if not fully understand what I am doing and why I am doing it. It will be some time yet before I consider mentioning to my parents.<P>At the risk of offending you, think for a moment. Where is your focus? If your focus is on your wife and her actions, and you are trying to make her want to come back, is that not making an idol of her? Your focus has to be on God, not your wife.<P>I have not seen or talked to my wife for almost 7 months now, yet I have faith my marriage is being healed and restored. By who? Me and my actions? My wife and her actions? Or the Lord Jesus Christ? Which one would you choose?<P>You seem to still be focusing on the circumstances. You must look above the circumstances for your answers. I don't know all the answers for my own marriage, much less yours.<P>But, I know someone that does. Take your hurt, doubt and fear to him. Humble yourself before the Lord and cry out to Him. Open your Bible and read it. Pray as you read and ask God to give you words of encouragement and comfort. Don't stop until you have them. It might take a few minutes or several hours, I don't know.<P>Ask Him to soften your heart and search it for anything that does not belong. Ask Him to reveal areas in your life that need worked on. You have to be willing to let God work on you, and change you before anything can change in your marriage, I believe.<P>When I pray for my wife I do not ask God to change her to make her come back. I have already asked God to heal our marriage and family and have the knowledge He is doing it. What I do is pray for God to protect her, bless her, heal her, show her His will for her life, pour out His gifts and glory on her, and that He fill her with His love. These are the main things I pray for my wife.<P>My wife is uninterested in contact with me at this time. Your wife is still speaking to you, even if not in the way you want. What a wonderful chance you have there. But first you must be right with the Lord. Do not argue with her, try to convince her of anything, or get her to do anything. Keep your conversations simple, polite and pleasant.<P>Humble yourself before the Lord, repent whatever He convicts you of, allow Him to change you into the person He wants you to be, then your marriage can be healed and restored.<P>Father, I ask that you wrap Lone_Knight in a blanket of your love tonight, let him feel your presence surrounding and comforting him. Examine his heart, Father, and show him what needs cleansed and purified. Guide him to what he needs to hear when he reads your Word, Father. Show him the changes You want to make in his life, Father, so that his marriage may be healed and restored. Bring the people into his daily life that You want to use to help him, Father. Father, show him that his real enemy is the devil, and that you have already defeated the devil.<P>I ask this in the name of Jesus. Amen.

Lone knight,<P>My best friend told me that divorce papers are only a piece of paper. I to believe that If God wants my marraige to be back he will do so it might not be as soon as i want it but if its in his power he will make it work, but at the same time it is hard to go on and keep the faith. I pray every night that God will make my marriage endure this affair, but also remember that God is with you every step of the way. My prayes are with you.<BR>

LN - Here are some links to great devotionals and the Standers website. It will be encouraging to you, has helped me a lot in my stand.<BR> <A HREF="http://www.covenantkeepersinc.org/" TARGET=_blank>http://www.covenantkeepersinc.org/</A> <A HREF="http://devotionals.crosswalk.com/NeilAnderson/" TARGET=_blank>http://devotionals.crosswalk.com/NeilAnderson/</A> <A HREF="http://www.rejoiceministries.org/" TARGET=_blank>http://www.rejoiceministries.org/</A> <A HREF="http://www.webpulse.com/sanctuary/dave/sharing.htm#sharing7.htm" TARGET=_blank>http://www.webpulse.com/sanctuary/dave/sharing.htm#sharing7.htm</A> <A HREF="http://www.christianet.com/matthews/" TARGET=_blank>http://www.christianet.com/matthews/</A> <A HREF="http://www.bju.edu/faith/vol9num6/stand.html" TARGET=_blank>http://www.bju.edu/faith/vol9num6/stand.html</A> <BR>

My wife went to my counselor with me tonight. They talked while I was out of the room. While I was outside I prayed, claimed miracles to save our marriage and thanked GOD for every blessing and miracle he gave to me. Then the counselor came out and we went back into the office. With my wife sitting there, he said she told him there was no way IN HEAVEN or HELL that this marriage would ever be rebuilt, and as soon as she can get the money, she is filing for divorce. She told him there is no way we will EVER get back together. I quit. I give up. I have fought the fight to the best of my abilities. I will never marry anyone else but my wife. I will never begin any relationship other than with my life. I will now just be a daddy to our daughter, and live my life as a bachelor. No more hope of saving this marriage or being with her ever again. I have bills to pay, a life to live, and a daughter to be a daddy for. I will not hope, I can't hold on to faith, I can't hold on to believing the promises and scriptures. I am just going to live what life I can, be there for my daughter and just give up on everything to do with my wife and our marriage. If I continue to hold on, I will drive myself crazy. I can't raise my daughter from a mental institution. I am finished, I quit, Just me and my daughter from now on.<BR>Lone_Knight<BR>

LN - I am sorry you are feeling so down. I will be praying for you. God wants you to be happy, and feel loved. He loves you and will give you peace in your heart. I got the following email message from a lady on another prayer group. I wanted to share it with you. It helps me remember that <B>I</B> cannot fix my marriage, only <B>GOD</B> can. I have to get out of God's way altogether, and let Him perform the miracle its going to take.<P>"When I woke up this morning, I was thinking about my husband and our marriage and the Lord said this to me:<P><B>"I don't need your help. I need your faith."</B><P>I have been so busy "doing" things to try to bring about the restoration of my marriage - which brings anxiety - and the Lord just wanted me to believe that he will do what he said he would do.<P>One morning, just before I woke up, the Lord spoke one word to me. It was "incredulous". I've heard the word, but I did not know the complete definition. In phrase, "incredulous" means - doubting what is true.<P>God gave me His word of truth concerning my marriage and I was so busy "helping" God that I did not realize that by doing that I wasn't trusting God.<P>God does not need your help, He needs your faith. And when you have faith in God, he will replace that anxiety with rest. (Hebrews 4)"<P>Lord, thank You for your unending love for each of us, your guidance throughout our trials. I am so thankful for Your word, and your reminders that You want me to get out of your way. Thank You Lord for being right with me, no matter what I do, or no matter what mistakes I make. You are my King, my Savior and I will follow you forever. I praise Your holy name, Lord. Thank You for all you have done. Father, I lift up Lone Knight to you, asking dear Lord for an infilling of the Holy Spirit for him, comforting him. Please give him an extra measure of Your peace. I pray that Your will for his life and marriage will be revealed to him, and he will trust You. Thank You Lord for calling his name, for working in his life. Lord, we thank you for your promise that "nothing can separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord" (Romans 8:39). You will never forsake us, and we trust in you to take care of our every need. Lord, please guide Lone Knight in each and every decision he makes, and direct his paths according to Your perfect will. Please reveal to him any changes he needs to make in his life so that his life is within Your perfect will. Give him, Lord a heart of purity, holiness, love, forgiveness, and consideration. Help him Lord to be the Godly Christian You want him to be. I pray that You will speak mightily to his wife's heart, mind and soul, reminding her of the covenant she made before You in marriage. Thank You Lord for convicting her, drawing her close to You. You are wonderful, almighty, and so worthy of all our praise. Thank You Lord. IJN AMEN

Dear Ondedayatatime, AW,RON, and all of my friends in Christ;<BR>I thank everyone for their prayers. They are all incredibly uplifting and insightful. The comments and words of encouragement are tremendous blessings to my spirit and my life, as I strive to be the man that GOD wants me to be. My clinical depression has reached a point where all negatives are readily absorbed and accepted and any positive truths are seemingly oblivious to me. When the counselor told me that my wife said no way in heaven, hell, or on earth will the marriage be saved, It was as though the final chapter of the book had been written and that it was printed, published and out on the streets. I have realized that NO ONE can fight free will, Not even the Almighty. He can guide, but that doesn't mean the person will always do what GOD wants. As much as I choose to believe that GOD is speaking to me, saying to hold on, the marriage is being restored, I am also aware that as long as my wife chooses to say no to GOD'S will, all the prayers will be heard but not able to break through her rejection and indifference. My faith in GOD has waivered, but not failed all together. My dreams no longer mean anything. I will let it go, to the best of my ability and try to live my life for my daughter. She needs a healthy daddy and one who can be happy when they are together, even if for a time, it is an act. Please continue to pray for my healing, and perhaps when that day comes, the dreams and the hope for a reconciliation will come into fruition. It is now time for me to heal, and forget chasing a dream. I can only heal and change ME. I can not change her, nor can anyone else, but GOD. But she will have to stop saying no to HIS will before she can change her mind and fight for our marriage. I must devote all my time and energies into healing myself, becomming free of the bondage of a depression that paralyses my very being with fear at the loss of this family and this marriage. I thank you all for everything and my prayers are with you all. GOD bless you all.<BR>Lone_Knight.<BR>

Lone Knight,<P>Believe it or not, you are now in a position where God can work. Only when we realize our lack of ability or wisdom can He work. I came to this place with my H and marriage, and children, (over 21). Give them to God, pray hedges of thorns around them, and that they will hear God speaking to them. Then you must get help for the clinical depression. My car has many scrapes that occurred during the first 2 months. (It's been 4 since I found out.) I carried my herbals with me and took them to get my ripped midsection to calm down enough so I could teach the next lesson. They do help. I still take prescription anti-dep., too. If I didn't I would be totally negative, hugging the bed, neglecting house and jobs, and cry all the time. God doesn't want this for us, and has given medical personnel knowledge for treating this. If you'd like to know more about the herbals, I can give you more information.<P>My H was adamant he would not be back, no matter what. We have met and begun d. paperwork. It should be final in 60 days, unless God intervenes. At night I read the Bible until I can't hold eyes open, and pray. <BR>I have concentrated on the things that I did or did not do in the marriage. I was complacently secure. I tell God he has to work with my H, and pray that I will talk less when in contact with H. The book from Restore Ministries is inexpensive and vital. To me, the books have been a good substitute for meals and well worth the struggle to pay. I will pray that you will be able to get one.<P>Guess what, today, my H called and asked if I'd like to have lunch. As much as I wanted to reach out and hug, I settled for a hand squeeze as I left the car. He didn't come in because my son is still here, long story. A week ago I would have never believed that would happen. So keep praying. Psalm 27 says "Be still and wait on God." <P>Heavenlyl Father,<P>We praise you for your blessings, and your Word. Thank you for showing us the things we can do do make us better Christians, parents, and spouses. Dear Lord, we hold Lone Knight up just now and through the day and week. He is crying out for sustenance of the spirit, and strength to live life, work, be a good father, and desperately wants to be a good husband. Lord, all strength and wisdom comes from you, and this we ask for Lone Knight as well as ourselves. Thank you for answered prayer, let us never leave your side. Remind him that you are always with us, and show him the scriptures that will edify him. Father, we ask that you guide someone to him who will pray with him in his stand.<BR>Thank you for answered prayer, and give us the patience and calmness needed. In Jesus' name, AMEN.<P>Continuing in prayer, <BR>Committed

Dear Committed;<P>I thank you so very much for your posts. They are always so very powerful. They are faith builders just as are the posts from all of the other WONDERFUL people I have been blessed with meeting here, albeit indirectly. All day today, I have simply sat around the house,feeling sorry for myself, not trying to focus on anything..... UNTIL I realized I had bills that were due in two days and that they HAD to be paid. I was blessed with a gift of enough money to pay the ones that were past due, and the ones that were of crucial need, utilities, phone, gas. etc. She can not continue helping me this way, nor can I humble myself to ask anyone else to "give" to me so that I can live. No one can straighten this financial mess out but ME and as long as I am apathetic and do nothing to help myself, I will NEVER break free from any of these burdens. So I wrote out the checks I had to, and using ALL of the money to pay these bills, actually GOT out of my house, drove around to the various businesses and made the payments. I turned on the radio to a christian radio station and listened to the music and actually forgot my troubles for a half an hour. I stopped and got something to eat, something I haven't really wanted to do in weeks.... and I ate lunch. I came back home to a house that looks like a tornado hit it from my wife moving out, and cleaned up the major things. There is still vaccuuming to do and other small tasks, but I don't feel like doing them, knowing she will be back tomorrow with a moving van, gathering the rest of her things and what items we shared that she wants. The house already looks like a ghost town and every wall is bare that used to hold glorious pictures of our family. IT is much like a tomb, but as odd as it may seem, the only place in the world I truly feel alive or safe, or whatever it is I feel. I am making progress, not as rapididly as some, even myself would like, but then again, ROME wasn't built in a day. I still want to fight for our marriage, but I don't know how to fight, who to fight, or where to fight. Everyone around me tells me to just SHUT UP about it and let her go. Something that rips at the very core of my heart and soul. But I can't keep living like this. I have to just shut everything out as best I can and TRY to heal within myself with the touch of the Master's hand. I will always be in need of prayer, support and encouragement, until I can find ways to beat this disease called depression.I no longer wish to end my life, but I don't want to "live" my life either, especially without the warmth and touch of my family around me. I can't have that, so there is no point in dwelling on something that will not occur. Thank you again for your words of encouragement, your thoughts AND your prayers. I will also continue to pray for you and your family that GOD will do miracles and healings that will bring you and your husband together again. GOD Bless you and everyone that has been so kind to me and supportive. <BR>In Christian love.<BR>Lone_Knight<BR>I can do ALL things through Christ, who strengthens me.<P>

Lone Knight,<BR>The last line of your post reminds me of the verse, "with man it is impossible, with God NOTHING is impossible." When my husband left last summer, he told everyone, including my son, there was NO CHANCE of him ever going back, he hated me, all he wanted was a divorce, blah blah blah. He was gone 2 months. After 6 weeks of being gone, he "suddenly" wanted to come home, and started asking me if we could talk about working things out. Since we were in divorce proceedings, I had not been praying for him except for asking the Lord during prayers with my son to take care of "his dad". After he came home, I asked him why he decided he wanted to stay married and work things out, and he said he didn't know, had no idea, he just wanted to. That was the Lord <B>TURNING HIS HEART</B>. Yes, he had "free will" to choose not to come home, however the desire the Lord layed upon his heart was so overpowering he did what was in his heart. So, my point here is with God nothing is impossible, as He, the Lord, turned an "impossible" into a "possible" in my husband, who had no idea what was going on. There is always Hope in Jesus, Lone Knight. Rest in Him, he will heal your heart and direct your path if you will turn it all over to Him. At least for me, when I try to say or do things to influence my H into doing what I want him to do, it is never as effective or positive as when I pray and ask the Lord to handle it, then get out of God's way and let Him handle it. Give your wife over to the Lord, let him fight this battle for you. <P>You are in my prayers LN.<P>Blessings to you,<BR>AW

I have absolutely no fight left. I quit. My wife told me today, one of the reasons she would not consider reconciliation is her son told her he hates me so much that if we get back together he will run away from home and she will NOT let that happen. <BR>That's it, that's the end. This story is completed and the final chapter of our marriage is written. I dont' know what GOD gave this family that was so special or tremendously important that the devil had to pull out ALL the stops and fight to destroy us, but satan did it. I have no fight, no energy no strength. I still have undying love for my wife, step son and my the daughter my wife and I brought into this world. But the only one who will ever return that love is my daughter. I surrender. Raising the white flag. I quit.<BR>Lone_knight<BR>

LN,<BR>I am about at the same point as you. But I know that now that you have given up, God can work. That is what he wants, us to realize that the battle is His and the Glory for the restoration is His also.<BR>I am about at the end also. I must stop trying to talk to h and just pray, praise the Lord and wait. This has been hard for me to accept.But God has kept at it. I am ready to give up and say Lord, if You want this marriage to be restored then it will be, but if not then there is a good reason and a better plan for me. God is faithful, and it has taken me a very long time to feel broken down. Surrender as a human is difficult.<P>Father, <BR>I pray for LN and myself to just lay it at Your feet and walk away. Lord, help us just to pray that Your will be done and ask a hedge of protective thorns be placed around our spouses. As it should be, only You can change their hearts. I pray on my part that all my meddling has not done irrepairable damage and strengthened strongholds in my h. Lord, place Your mighty and steady hand on our shoulders giving us comfort and support. I praise You, Lord, for You know the plans You have for us, plans to prosper us and not to harm us. Plans to give us hope and a future. I pray Lord, that we accept Your will for the future and praise You for the plans You have. Your plans are perfect and perfect for us. We do not want anything that is not of You. Lord, let us fix our eyes on You Lord. Thank You Jesus for calling me to You. How amazing. You see us, each one of us and You call us personaly. Thank You, Jesus. In Jesus name we pray, Amen.

Thank you all for your prayers. I believe with all my heart and the faith I have gathered from the encouraging words from you all that the family will be together again someday. And our marriage will be more precious than gold, someday.<BR>Lone_Knight

It sure is hard trying to believe in your marriage when everyone aroung you thinks you are crazy. I am facing that right now. My biggest supporter of my marriage is a gentleman friend. He keeps telling me if there is any chance for my marriage to work he will back away. He is very supportive he is divorced his W had an affair. It is nice to have a friend who knows what ie feels like. Its also nice to have someone to have supper with and go to the movies with. He will asways be a friend. I will keep up the prayers.

Lone Knight,<P>Please see my post under "Prayer Changes Things". KEEP PRAYING. <P>I have to go to work, and can't write more, but please read the above, dated July 10.<P>God bless you,<BR>Committed

lone knight,<P>My Husband cheated on me for 8 months. He would leave me to run to OW, come back to me, stay for a while, and then run back to her. This went on and on and on. God saw me through it all and he will see me through the rest of the way too! <P>After 7 months of this, I realized that I couldn't do anymore to try and fix this situation. I couldn't make my Husband come back home and stay! Only he could! I fully put my trust in God and gave my burdens to him. When I did that, God took away my hurt and pain. The love that I've felt for H has always stayed, but I didn't feel alone anymore. I decided to move on and became involved with my neighbor who is single. I truly believed at that time that my H was moving on, that we were going to be divorced, so I opened myself up to this new person. It was the wrong thing to do. It was right for me to step back and let God work, but I went the wrong way in the process. What happened after that has become a mess.<P>When my H found out about my new relationship (long story to give all the details) he tried to commit suicide. He overdosed on Tylenol and was in the hospital for a few days. The doctors say that he could have damaged his liver, but won't know for sure until more tests are run. My H is back home again. I didn't want him to come home this way, but he is home. He has now given his life over to God again which is wonderful news, but things are still so difficult. So many people, neighbors, family members have been involved and it has only caused us more problems. I don't know how my life or future will turn out. I just know that I must continue to trust in God. God is the answer. Let him take those burdens on for you. He can change peoples hearts and renew their minds, but no I don't believe he can change their will. They must do that on their own. <P>I hate myself for the added mess that I have brought into our marriage. God will make things right again someday. He will not fail us....NEVER! The path that we have to take may be hard, but we will have joy in the end. I do believe that even though through all of this, I am now at the hardest part yet! God can get me through this too! When he does....it will be a true miracle! Believe what God tells you! Stay strong in Him and don't make any mistakes that I have made. Trust in God and he will carry you through it all! I wish you the best!