OK, deep theological discussion coming here, so if you don't desire to get involved in it, ya might wanna bail now.<p>In Luke, in the story of the Prodigal, it outlines pretty much how the prodigal son acted while he was "away from home." I see a LOT of similarities of how my H is acting.<p>Prodigal wanted to "live the wild life," squandered his money, etc. Yeah, that's what my WH did! <p>When the prodigal realized (the Bible says "Came to his senses" - I LIKE THAT!!!)that he was being foolish, he started home (after having a long talk with himself, but I'll skip that part). It says in the scriptures that when he "was still a long way off, his father saw him..."<p>So many on here say "get on with your life," "focus on you," "let him go his way," OK, I got it. BUT the way I read this scripture, the Prodigal's FATHER was looking for him to return in order to have seen him from "a long way off."<p>My question is this: HOW can you say "just let him go his way....don't keep dwelling on WS, etc...." when it's obvious to ME, from this passage of scripture that Prodigal's father kept a watchful eye every day for the day his Prodigal son would return, believing all the time that he was coming home. Shouldn't we be doing that same thing? Is it CRAZY to "keep looking out" for our WS's to come home?<p>I guess what prompted me to post this question is that every day, when I turn that final turn, where I can see my house down the street, the FIRST thing I look to see is if my WH's truck is sitting in the driveway. I don't find this bizarre, unusual or obsessive behavior. I find it to be "faith, believing against hope..." or something like that. Is it obsessive? Or is this having faith in God's promises?<p>Thanks for all replies, I'd like to hear others' thoughts.<p>Lupo

Lupo Wrote:
My question is this: HOW can you say "just let him go his way....don't keep dwelling on WS, etc...." when it's obvious to ME, from this passage of scripture that Prodigal's father kept a watchful eye every day for the day his Prodigal son would return, believing all the time that he was coming home. Shouldn't we be doing that same thing? Is it CRAZY to "keep looking out" for our WS's to come home?<p>Pray2day Response:<p>I can relate so much to what you wrote. I am doing the same thing. I also look for his truck to be in the driveway each time I come home. I also listen for his truck to pull up. I feel I am waiting in FAITH and expecting God to bring my husband home. FAITH must be put into action to be faith. I feel I am doing what Jesus would do. <p>Would God really "get on with his life?" Or would he wait expecting for a miracle. <p>Ask yourself "What would Jesus do?" This will help you to know if you are obsessing.<p>I also wondered if there was something wrong with me because I am so focused on my husband coming home and our marriage being restored. I can tell you this is from God because I was never obsessed over my husband before he left and had an affair. I believe God changed my heart to love my husband unconditionally even while he is living with ow. I used to have so much anger in my heart towards him before he left for the ow. Now my heart is full of love and compassion for him. I pray every waking moment for his soul to return to Jesus. I do believe God is going to go after my H, the one lost sheep. Should we do any less?<p>Send me your email address if you want. Also there is a ministry called Rejoice Marriage Ministries that I really enjoy. It is online at www.rejoiceministries.org They talk about waiting for your spouse to come home "Suddenly"
To be ready at any moment for their return. <p>I think you are doing the right thing. Keep looking to Jesus and I will pray for you to have his perfect peace.<p>Pray2day
My email is pray2day@msn.com

Wow, that's a good question. I'm sure there are alot of us on the board who have asked the same question. I still don't have an answer.<p>All I know is that keeping that "emotional option" open, for me, landed me in the hospital. It was soooo stressful and I did feel like I was obsessing or something very similar to it. <p>I had to find a way to live with the fact that he was gone, not coming back and STILL trying to believe that he could come home (faith).<p>I guess I finally came to a point that I felt I HAD to move on, accept the situation, etc. Do I think this was a lack of faith? In some ways, yes. But in others, no. <p>There is also scripture dealing with not associating/fellowshiping with the sinful brother/sister (I Corinthians 5:9-13). <p>So I KNOW that God could perform a miracle on him...on me...on our marriage; I believe that. But I still have to "get on" with my life in some fashion. Is sitting in my room each night hoping going to bring it about any sooner than "getting on" with my life? Who knows?<p>We have to be careful to not mix the message of faith & hope with today's so called wisdom on "visualizations...acting as if....name it and claim it."<p>Ya know, Moses took his son, tied him to an alter and rose the knife above his head. Moses was getting on with his life...what he was supposed to be doing. He did all that even WITH hope and faith that God could stop him. And God did. <p>The disciples, after Christ's death, got discourage and went fishing. They carried on with their lives. It was in that, that Jesus came to them on the beach. <p>Jesus commands us to keep a watchful eye out for His return. Does that mean we just drop everything, sell everything and sit there waiting? I doubt if any Christian is doing that. We are getting on with our lives, yet still hoping and waiting for His return.<p>So faith and belief in God can "look like" any number of things. I believe that it's more of a heart attitude than anything else. <p>If my H today, came to me and said he wants to try again, I would have to consider it. It's been TWO YEARS!!! And he's been living with the OW!! But because I have faith that God could heal my marriage, I just don't close that door. Yet, I've taken all his pictures down at home; he's cleaned all his stuff out. I'm not expecing him to come home. But I wouldn't be surprised if he wanted to.<p>Anyway, it's a hard question and I hope what I've said makes sense. I don't mean to sound discouraging or that I don't believe, but we have GOT to believe in God REGARDLESS if our spouses come back or not, REGARDLESS if we have faith that they will or not. REGARDLESS if we move on or not. <p>I think we need to believe in God, not just in what He will/can/could do for us. We believe in Him even if these things NEVER happen.<p>That's what I guess I think real faith is. <p>Aloha,
Ms.O

I believe the Prodigals father knew deep in his heart his son would come back. He just trusted God as to when.
Some of our prodigals come back half heartedly, cause they cant get over their guilt. My W is one of them. She seems more like how the children of Israel were in the desert. Longing to go back to Egypt where it was more comfortable than trusting in God. Im feeling like moses at this point and becoming very angry and if my anger gets any worse, i wont lead her into the promised land. My enemies are growing more powerful and relentless.
Her mother is giving her number out to all her doper friends of the past. Shes in a recovery house for Gods sake. Why cant she see how evil her mother is? My W wont put up any boundries either. She also walks all over mine. Im to angry to speak to her right now. I keep asking God when will all the evil schemes stop. My W wants our marriage and family back together now and shes being threatened by my family and hers that she will loose her son if we get back together. She believes it. Please pray for me. I want to give up so bad. Please somebody get thru to God to back the enemy off of me and especially my W whom cant handle spiritual warfare at its finest. I feel so forsaken. Ive been thru this long enough. Over 3 years this time. But this war has been going on for 8 years. Her mother despises Christ in me with a passion. She is definantly a modern day Jezebel. Just when i have great hope, im blind sided with something even worse. My W even told me she wants a divorce to please her mommy. She says it will prove im not trying to control her??? I just dont get it. She buys these lies. But she tells me we will eventually get remarried. My W has never known real love in her life, so she considers it control, cause her mommy says it is. Try dealing with someone thats mentally ill and being mentally abused by their satanic mother. It is no fun at all. I have grown so frustrated i scream and yell.(when alone) Whats God waiting for? Please pray for me.
Im loosing my faith. Im finding i dont even want it. It must be the devils birthday....
Mark

Wow. I have had same ideas. What is so hard for us is that by the time they decide they've had too much slop, we could be gone permanently. They have to wreck it all, as it would seem, before they would ever consider coming back.<p>Yes, the father always looked for the son. I think I always will look for him. Had the hardest night ever. Almost quit looking period. Almost lost all faith and decided to continue on w/D I filed on 9/11. Not sure and lost, but you make incredible comments and give good insight. Am afraid he's beginning to take me down with him. I will continue to pray for you.

An aspect of prayer is watching. Remember Jesus wanted His disciples to watch and pray with Him and they couldn't--too sleepy?<p>I think we get "sleepy" when we get complacent, you know, lazy in our faith and loosen our grip on the devil's neck...<p>I think that we sometimes allow circumstances to distract, you know, focusing on what is going on around us more than focusing on God's Word and His promises?<p>"Watching" to me, means keeping that sense of expectation, feeling reassured knowing that God has listened to our concerns and He is not only willing but able to answer our prayers.<p>After all, HE cares for us affectionately and watchfully!<p>We can all "watch" and see what God is about to do because where sin abounds, grace much more abounds!!! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>p.s.Lupo, just wanted to let you know that I totally agreed with you on one of your recent posts on another forum. You know "the one." [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

<blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr>Originally posted by BINthereDUNthat:
<strong>"Watching" to me, means keeping that sense of expectation, feeling reassured knowing that God has listened to our concerns and He is not only willing but able to answer our prayers.<p>p.s.Lupo, just wanted to let you know that I totally agreed with you on one of your recent posts....</strong><hr></blockquote><p>Thanks, Binthere...<p>I DO have reassurance and "belief" in God's answering His promises to me. Promises that I believe He gave me....it's just that when we are "only human" we tend to get caught up in the every-day things and sometimes God seems to take too long! I know His timing is perfect, it's just hard for US to realize that!<p>There's also the little issue of "the enemy" - who constantly whispers lies into my ear!! Telling me things, like, "Your H is never coming home....he's happy w/OW....he would call if he wanted to talk to YOU, but he doesn't, figure it out!" ALL of these things are only Satan trying to dissuade me away from God's promises. As soon as I "give up" then he has WON, and God cannot work in that atmosphere of unbelief!<p>I'm trying to "get it."<p>BTW, Bin, THANKS for the "other." I suspect you aren't the only one, since I wasn't flamed, like I thought I might be. [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Lupo

I looked everywhere for your e-mail so I could be more specific but glad you know exactly what I was talking about... [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] I think sometimes we get addicted to our misery and there is just no convincing us otherwise. WE have to make the decision to change our minds. Fortunately, we get to select our thoughts! [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] <p>I'm standing together with you in faith. I know God has responded to your faith a long time ago when you prayed. Now all that is left to do is thank Him continually, and right in the devil's face. That confuses him you know? When we praise God in the middle of trials... He sends stinky circumstances and we respond with our hands, faces, and voices praising God that He has heard our prayers. Totally confuses the devil because he wants us to react to the negativity (with LBs). Remember, he wanted to be worshiped when he was Lucifer in heaven but his pride went before his fall. He might not know what is in our hearts or in our minds, but HE SEES US when we lift our hands and our voices to heaven and thank GOD! He KNOWS what that means! It means the good fight of faith is ON!!! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] GO GET 'EM GOD!!!