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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 23
Junior Member
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OP
Junior Member
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 23 |
well.. he promised me to go with me to the attorney, and the police.. regarding the harassment. guess what... he avoided.<P>mr conflict avoider himself. well i told him, that's it. after 2 years of this. <P>i said, i'm going away, and when i get back you either make up your mind about what is important to you. Protecting your wife, or protecting your lover. I give up. If he hasnt made a decision by the time i come back, i'm leaving. <P>CDA
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Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 972
Member
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Member
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 972 |
CDA:<P>Well, he didn't really lie, he just wants to avoid having to do anything that will upset either one of you. Since he knows the OW better then you do, maybe you should follow his lead on this. The few times I have tried to restrict my husband's OW she has considered it a challenge and tripled her efforts to annoy me. And he made absolutely no effort to stop her....just said he couldn't do anything with her.<P>I'm afraid the legal remedies you have available may not be adequate to bring you any real relief. In some states you can have OW arrested for harrassment...but usually that has to be some type of physical harrassment. Any remedy for phone calls and e-mail would be a token jesture...and not particularily enforceable. In the realm of police work this type of thing is low priority. <P>The one thing your H could do is to make former OW understand "It is over" and "I don't want to be involved with you again." Because he is an avoider, perhaps he has not made that clear to her and she thinks that you are the reason he has not come back to her.<P>If you husband really wants the marriage to work, then you have to make him understand that you must have closure and that he has to do it...you can't do it for him.<P>Hang in there and we'll pray that your H can decide what's really important to him.<P><BR>Buffy <BR> <P> <P>
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Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 23
Junior Member
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OP
Junior Member
Joined: Mar 2000
Posts: 23 |
Buffy,<P>I'm pressed for time right now. Have to do the obligatory job thing.<P>I understand everything you are saying. I've had this trouble before. I've tried to stop her legally myself, but since i "never had any time of relationship, live in or otherwise" i can't do anything about her harrasing me. I need him to actually do it, in order to PROTECT me. She has physically tried to hurt me on more than one occasion.<P>Anyhoo.. thanks for the reply. I'll try to give an update after work.<P>Have a nice day all!<P>CDA
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