H and I had an arguement and he continues to lie to me after all is said and done, after everything is out in the open, he still will not admit that he lied! He told me to take back all of my X-Mas gifts that I bought for him, that he wasn't going to fake being happy and waste his money on a gift for me. I asked him if that is the case then why continue on with this. He said he is not and I asked him point blank, "Is it over" and he said "Yes". I went to bed crying, 20 minutes later I asked him why is it that he claims to love me but can look in my face and blatantly lie after everything is out in the open. He is lying about a certain event and she was there, everyone else there has confirmed it but he won't admit that he still lies to me after almost 2 years later about that event. I told him calmly, trying to not cry, that after everything he has done to me that I deserve an honest answer, he just laid their wouldn't answer. I ended it with "I hope you realize what you have done and I hope you have learned something from this and I hope the next person you are with you never treat this way"! I went to bed and cried all night. I still have a lump in my throat. I don't understand why he refuses to admit it after all this time. He has shown me someone that I don't want to ever continue my life with. I think my eyes have finally been opened as to what type of person he really is. This is not the first, the second, the third or the fourth time that he cheated on me, and the longest was for over 4 years. But I loved him unconditionally, and kept hoping that one day he would see what he has in me. I can't hope anymore and I don't want to continue anymore, I don't want him anymore. I have to go, I am crying at work and can't continue this.

I really don't have any great advice to give you. Just know that everyone here will help you through the hard times as well as the happy times. Perhaps someone else here who can be more of a help. Try to set sometime aside for you, do something nice for yourself - your worth it. Monique

Oh, I am so sorry. What a terrible night for you. Just letting you know that I'm here and you're in my prayers.<P>{{{{{{{{{{{{trying}}}}}}}}}}}}}}<P>Lori

Thanks Monique and Lostva, I was beginning to feel another rejection in here when no one responded. This sux and hurts and just have to keep the strength to follow Plan B! Normally I would have emailed by now to try to make sure if he really meant it is over, but now this time, I want out of this emotionally abusive pattern. He and I have a problem with communication and it seems our entire relationship is about control and competition! Nothing but who can top the other in the pain dept. I WILL MAKE IT THROUGH, I WiLL MAKE IT THROUGH!

I am sorry to hear the pain you are going thru. I want to talk about his behavior because i also acted in his ways sometimes with my wife and thats why we are also in our troubles. Understand that when you say you love or did love him unconditionally, you probably were doing all the giving and he continued to take and take thats what i did. weather intentionally or not. But when you cry yourself to sleep and he seems not to worry, well i also did that to my wife, why well now, i think because i somehow knew she would come back to me and i was just plain selfesh, insecure and have a hard time forgiving. What really opened my eyes was when my wife said I DONT NEED THIS ANYMORE...I am outta here. This time i knew i had gone too far. And she seemed not to care if we made it or not, so i now had to make a decision, change or let her go period. You have to get out now, weather permantly or temporarily. But if he wants to change, the bottom line, who cares about the two years and lying, you said its not the 1st time. Take care of yourself, i know its hard but hang in there. Hope this helps a little.

Thanks pooh! Your post means a lot. At least I know I am not the only one who has survived this. I think you are correct about the way he is thinking, that I won't be going anywhere and will continue to keep coming back no matter what, since I have in the past. I just have to know I have the strength to say ENOUGH! and move on. My last sentence to him was "I hope you realize what you have done, and I hope you will learn something from it and I hope the next person you are with you don't treat like this". He could tell my voice was breaking as I tried to hold back tears. But I know you can't make someone see unless they are willing to not be blind!! A true statement from 1 of the people here on the board!

Trying....sorry you are going through this pain. I can't respond productively right now (I feel too messed up right now). Just want you to know that you are not alone and I am praying for you.

Not really much advice I can offer either. Just wanted to say that I am sorry you are hurting so much and you have my prayers too. Just remember to look out for yourself.

Not really much advice I can offer either. Just wanted to say that I am sorry you are hurting so much and you have my prayers too. Just remember to look out for yourself.

I know how you are feeling. I've had those nights myself... also early mornings before work. I think back on those times and wonder how I got through it all. I did and you will. Be strong, pray hard and care for yourself.