Hi to everybody.
Here is my story.
We have been married with my husband for 5 months now. We put a lot of efforts and time to get marriage as we are from different countries and I had to move to his place. After marriage my husband lost interest in sex with me. He stopped kissing me passionately. I'm an attractive woman and I notice there is something wrong. Because I needed to be close and I needed sex and he was not happy I initiate it. Every time I talk to him he says everything is ok.
About in a month he left his email open and I read it! He was writing to a girl who placed her advertisement about escort service. He asked how much and if it includes sex. I was in shock! Why dose he need an escort if he has a beautiful wife? Why to pay for sex if his wife is dying without sex?
I have been talking about it a lot and he said that is was a joke he just was curies and it was a joke for a friend. He asked me to forgive and forget and trust him because it will effect out marriage.
I tried to forget and almost forgot.
Meanwhile he was a very outgoing person and he can sometimes wake up 3 am and just say "I'm bored I want to go out" When I ask him why can't he take me out if he wants to go so late he says he just want to meet a friend who is available after 3 am or just want to have his space. He asks me to give him space any time day or night he is feeling like going out. For me it was very difficult because In my culture if you are married usually people don't go out night time separated. May be once in 2 months I would understand.
We keep arguing about this all the time and I don't feel comfortable with this because he even can't tell exactly what friend and where will he go and what kind of friend is it that I can't meet.
I noticed that he is always reading a forum about local girls who work in hotels in sex business. Men talk about the girls which one provide good service which not. Once we went to one of the shopping complex which has hotel and he said he will leave me for 45 minutes and after we will meet. Was very strange why 45 minutes … I read at the same forum 45 minutes is time of the girls service. After that when we went to the same complex he was trying to leave me at least for 10 minutes.
I looked at his cell phone bill and noticed that he is keeping calling to that hotel and some other local hotels.
Some monthes ago his cell phone call 2.30 am I woke up him. I thought something urgent. When I asked him who was calling so late and why he said just a friend fooling aroung. Then I asked why then you have been talking for a while to him? He got very angry that I don't trust him I’m so suspicious.. I should be happy with an answer "just a friend" and don't ask anything more He said I should trust him like a blind man.
Well as I did not get an answer… I start to be suspicious nervous. I have allergy for his cell phone. Because after that he always set it as meeting or unvoiced so I can’t hear if someone is calling.
A month ago he said he need to go to another state about his work. It seamed very strange to me because he said he is going with his colleague but he never call him in front of me. Only once he called to someone and asked if 26th is confirm then he said he can’t talk now because of lightening. Before he left the house he said he is going not about his current job but a different project so he did not tell nobody at work. It was strange too because he did not tell me this before. I knew something is wrong.
A week ago I got his cell phone bill. I looked at the date he went and He call 1.00 am not from another state but the next city. The only phone numbers he call that day was our location hotel numbers and ………one cell phone number. When I call this number the girl answered and she spoke my language! Not many people in this country speak my language . It was a shock. I did not want anything I was sure he was with her. When he came back I said I’m giving you a chance tell me honestly what is going on . He did not want to tell me anything before I did not show his bill. Then he said because he was under pressure because of me that is why he wanted to be on his own one night. About the girl he said he was just talking to her and even have never met her. I looked at the bill It started about 2 months ago. And he kept calling her more and more. I said I want to divorce because I don’t trust you any more He was begging me he was crying to be with him to forgive and forget. I asked him don’t to lie to me any more and never talk to that girl any more. He said “ok” He said he dose not have any woman except me I was before Xmas day. Now one week later I still have pain and I feel very insecure when someone calling him specially night time. Someone called him 1.30 am but it show as Private number is calling I asked him who he said it was missed call. Last night we went to bed about 1.30 am and I woke up 7 I look at his phone it was a message there. I asked who is calling so late. He become very angry that I’m still so suspicious I should forget . But it still pain. I feel horrible to be like this. I feel very bad to look at his bills He said he never thought his wife will check everything. I never thought I will be like this too But I want an answer and I don’t get it from him.
Should I trust him? May be it is only on my mind ? I’m loosing my mind. Don’t know what to think and what to do.

My first instinct is that you are a troll and your post is fake....Because there are way too many things you mention for this NOT to be either an affair, or a series of sexual encounters...

If it's not, then would you still believe him if he walked in with lipstick on his underwear and a used condom in his backpocket?? I mean how ridiculous that he wants to go out at 3 a.m.....

And let me guess, you're STILL having unprotected sex with him...right?? Oh Yeah...please make a doctor's appt ASAP...that is if what you say is real......

YES HE IS HAVING SEX OUTSIDE OF YOUR MARRIAGE....as my 7 yr old would say....DUH!!!!!

I think that you are dealing with an A. And I think that you have what is called "denial". Denial, is the beginning of realization that your spouse is not being open and honest with you. We want to believe that this could not and would not happen to us, ever! But to help keep you in denial, your WS will tell you you are paranoid, crazy, "you don't trust me!" And so we stay in denial until we just get it. He is cheating. Or this is one very bizzarre story he is needing to tell you. And in either case, he is not being honest with you.

"Surviving An Affair", by Dr. Willard Harley. Jr. and Dr. Jennifer Harley Chalmers is easy to read and will help you and give you strength.

It sounds like we are dealing with a very naive person here. Good job that you found MBers. At least you can get some assistance from those that have suffered what you have, but I would recommend researching sex addiction (SA). And that is a terrible place to be in because with any addiction, he has to be willing to admit he has it first.

Good luck!