I ususally post on recovery board. But here is my current situation. Nearing 6 mo DDay anniversary. Done 3 months of joint MC. At a standstill. WS has not done any work to help aid our recovery. No questionnaires, very little reading, lots of LB, withdrawl, not meeting my EN (I doubt he has figured that out with his small amount of reading HN/HN; finally figured out his by observation.) <p>Question: I believe he has had no contact with OW since DDay. Even with no contact, it is wise to go to Plan B given his lack of support? Or do I contine to hold out hope, but for how long.<p>Sorry guys, are some men just that stubborn and prideful. I've been Plan Aing to the cows come home, but am at a breakpoint right now. I've made an appt with MC for me only tomorrow (he's done with this, too). Maybe he is one that needs to be Plan B'd no matter what.<p>Any insight? Thanks.<p>[ January 28, 2002: Message edited by: Love Is Patient ]</p>

LIP,<p>How about test H w/ some Venusian tricks ?. Not 180 degrees but test it w/ one action then see how H reacts. Basically, pull back on one actions then watch H's reaction. If he takes the bait then give him incentive for being a good boy. Then pull back again for him to chase you. If you knwo that he could be string then you do it full blast !!!. Follow CarolKH's link on my signature. For some reason work well w/ male but not so effective for female.<p>Good luck

Thanks Redhat for your thoughts. I've kinda tried this with him. Sometimes it works, most times it doesn't. I'm in this mode right know. I'll let you know if it works or not.

LIP,
Use the one that works, pull stronger and let him chase again when he does you reward him with more cheese than previous one ... [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] Drop the one that doesn't work and replacing it with the new ones.

Love is Patient,
Your signature says it all ! I know your feelings. You want everything fixed right now.<p>The Venusian tricks reminds me about what my mentor taught me in business. It's all about negotiation. And in negotiation everybody wants what they can't have. We would call it the boy-girl theory. Someone is always chasing the other. You want what you can't have. <p>I did the following and it helped my WS over the bump to make a committment as to what direction we were heading. I called and left a message on her cell phone. Basically, I said that I was going to "survive" this ordeal and I would love for her to survive it with me. However, if she felt this was not in the cards I would understand and still love her. <p>I think she heard in my voice that I was at a breaking point and was prepared to go it alone... and survive !<p>Needless to say my heart was racing 200 times a minute the next time we talked. When she said she knew she needed to be at home with me it was like a tremendous weight was lifted. <p>To date she is still not going as fast as I know love is patient. [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] <p>Coping&Hoping