My husband and I also have been married for 2 years, and I brought a son into the marriage. I can understand some of what you are experiencing -- especially because lately I've been working very long hours, and my husband has been taking over at home, helping my son with a school project, cooking, cleaning, etc. I have been telling him 10 times a day (or more!) how much I appreciate all his efforts -- I list them! Anyway, I know that if I didn't, he would begin to feel taken for granted, as I suspect you may be beginning to feel.<P>My H and I struggle with sharing the load. We've discussed the issue of work travel, although we haven't yet experienced it in fact, and have decided that we won't take jobs that will cause us to spend a lot of time apart. It would just be too stressful. It sounds, however, like you don't have much control over whether or not your W travels. You may, however, have some control over making the situation more satisfying for yourself. I would suggest you check out the Policy of Joint Agreement, and then begin negotiating. You might be able to imagine some things she could do to make the travel a bit more palatable for you. For example, it might feel better for you if she expresses her gratitude more often and more explicitly, or if she agrees to make love the night before and after each trip as a ritual! Or maybe for every night she's away, she cooks you a huge steak (or whatever your favourite meal is) for that number of evenings after she returns. Use your imagination!<P>There have been times when my husband has to work VERY late for months on end, and really has little control over it because of the industry he's in. I hate carrying the entire load at home, but it's much easier to take when it feels like I at least have a say in how it's handled, and get some recognition for all my effort!<P>In any case, I think that your feeling that you have to 'just grow up' is putting added pressure on yourself that you don't really need. You guys share this issue, and it has to be addressed otherwise you won't feel satisfied in your marriage -- no more, no less.<P>Oh, and one more piece of advice -- if she's working so much, be sure to take plenty of vacation time. My experience with this blended family business is that we need to put EXTRA 'love units' in the bank, because we don't have any history as carefree lovers. From the word go, we've had responsibility, pressure, concerns, etc. So we have to pay extra attention to fitting in as much fun as possible.<P>Good luck!
