I'll be glad to be the second to post here since my H filed yesterday and in 20 days I will be divorced.<P>Life sucks! I just wish that it hadn't ended upt this way!!!<P>TB

Teddybear,<P>I guess I have the honor(?) of being the first divorcee here. I was divorced on 2/1/00.<P>Hopefully I will be the only one that needs to post here!<P>Bob<P>------------------<BR>"You can't always get what you want! But if you try real hard,you might just find, you get what you need!"<BR>Mick Jagger

(((((teddy bear)))))<P>I'm so sorry to hear that your H has filed for divorce. If you need to talk to someone you can e-mail me at: holly.berry@mindspring.com<P>Tulip

My H and I both filed about 2 weeks ago. He had been saying he was filing for a month and I just started it. Got sick of waiting. Well, he filed at the same time. He was served Sunday and I was served yesterday. <P>What got me were his grounds. Cruel and inhuman treatment. I'm sorry but this is where I get angry. I was abused for 10 years physically and verbally. And I was cruel to him. The cruelest thing I did to him was not have sex with him after a day of being called names and sometimes hit. Sorry, but I can't turn into a great lover just because the kids went to bed. Also, how do you have a good sex life with someone who sits and drinks himself into a stupor almost daily? Cruel and inhuman? I call it protecting myself!<P>Sorry, I vented a little <BR>Mitzi

My H supposedly filed at the end of January, but I think he forgot to pay his lawyer or something. The agony of checking my mail everyday for papers is wearing me down. It's like a dread that constantly hangs over my head. Like what I've been through isn't enough, I know that soon it will be official that I have truely lost my husband. The fact that he has lost me or given me up doesn't phase him at all. I just feel empty.<P>Teddy bear,<P>I love your name. I collect teddy bears. Not just the 'collectable' ones, but all that I think are cute. My husband called them nappy bears, but I just told him that they looked like they had been loved. Sorry for the tangent.<P>Mitzi,<P>{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}<BR>Cruel and inhuman treatment. What is he thinking?? Take care of yourself and be confindent in the choices of your life.

<B>HOME</B>... now we have a home!! I wish we all didn't have to be here, but at least we have a "here" to be at.<P>My divorce was final on February 23rd. Sorry Bob, you're not the only one to be here.<P>Mitzi, My X said he had contacted a lawyer two weeks before he "asked" me to move out. That ment that he had contacted a lawyer 2 days after our 6th wedding anniversary.... when he pledged to love me forever, and bought me a custom designed bracelet... I don't think so!!<P>I learned something the first time we separated.... he didn't pay <B>any</B> of the bills, but managed to spend almost $1300 in 2 weeks. So, I contacted a lawyer a week before I moved out, and filed for legal separation the day I moved. I told him what I had done, and why. I found out the day he was due to answer the petition, he was shopping for a lawyer!!! (He called my lawyers partner ).<P>Anyway... the point was, they really don't know what they are doing, and they want to keep us guessing and want to be "first" in everything!<P>Ok, enough for my first post in our new section!<P>Thoughts & Prayers,<BR>Butterfly<P>------------------<BR>There are deep sorrows and killing cares in life, but the encouragement and love of friends were given us to make all difficulties bearable. <BR>-- John Oliver Holmes<P>The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference.<BR>-- Elie Wiesel<P><BR>

RWD, I will be joining your ranks as a divorcee in 21 days. <P>Tulip, I will definitely e-mail you. My e-mail is teddybear_12253@yahoomail.com<P>Thanks for the support! I'm sorry you are here too!<P>Mitzi, is he out of his mind???? I feel for you so much! At least I never had to put up with the physical abuse...only the mental mind games of a "practicing" psychology minor.<P>studentwife, I am so empty too! How can they just "turn their feelings off"? My H even basically suggested I change my name back. OUCH!<P>butterfly, I'm sorry about your divorce. I hope you are ok. They sure are good about making us feel like it is our fault! They DO like to keep us guessing. I am NOT going to miss the mind games. I am just relieved I don't have children with him!<P>To all, I am so sorry to see you all here, but I am glad too to know I am not going through this alone. Sounds weird huh? Anyway, I am so glad we all found a new home. <P> <P>TB<P>P.S. I collect teddy bears too! My whole house is decorated in them.