I'm finally back online. <P>After two days back home, w tells me that she wants to try again. Said she has been thinking for the last two weeks about not seeing the om. I was shocked. W moved back in the house last Sunday. Seperate rooms right now. She says she needs some time. Said she hurts a lot because there isn't a problem between her and om, that she is stopping seeing him because of us. They discussed it before I returned home. We start couples therapy tomorrow. I'm emotionally exhausted...

I'm so glad to hear this!!! YAY!!!<P>I know the emotional exhaustion and there will be more to come. It's a long road but you guys can do it!!!<P>Be loving and honest and help her with the withdrawal that is bound to occur.<P>Realize it for what it is and don't be too personalized with it. It's part of infidelity and must be worked through with love, patience and kindness.<P>Just keep your eyes on the goal of a happy and stronger marriage!!<P>Good Luck to you both,<P>Hugs,<P>Sheba

Withdrawal is really hard on both people.<P>My husband went through it big time. He still misses the OW after six months.<P>Be patient and loving. Show her that you are a bigger and better choice. <P>Keep posting here as you are in for one heck of a roller coaster ride. Hang on tight and know that we are all here for you.<P>On the brighter side. It does get better. This is just the first step in a long journey that can lead you to greater intimacy and happiness. <P><P>------------------<BR>God bless you and all of us.<P>Samantha<BR>

I haven't gotten there yet, but I wanted you to know I'm pulling for you both. Be strong, vent here, and give this ALL you've got. There are a lot of people here who HAVE been there. Take their advice, it's solid.<P>I'll be thinking about you two and praying for you.<P>Lori

Good for you..... Remember to show nothing but love. Show her that she is the most important thing in your life. Never let her forget that.<P>------------------<BR>Rutger......One day at a time.<P><p>[This message has been edited by Rutger (edited September 01, 1999).]

That is wonderful. I hope everything works out for you. Keep us posted.<P>------------------<BR>You are in my thoughts and prayers.<BR>* Viki

Thanks y'all!<P>I did exactly what SAA plan A says (from over a long distance) and it helped. She said the way I have behaved the last few months really showed her how much she means to me. I was away for the entire time and had to do it via emails and phone. She said she has been thinking of a reconciliation for the last two weeks. The day I returned home she said that I was still the most important and special person in her world. That meant the world to me. She lets me hug her. I haven't gotten the courage to kiss her lips yet, but have her cheeks. We've had a lot of crying. Good crying. <P>She is going through bad withdrawl. I know she still is in contact with om (he lives 300 miles away, contact via email) and I'm dealing with it. Her roller coaster is out of control regarding that. Big mood swings. I know she misses him. I haven't asked her to see this site yet or read any of Dr. Harley's books. Today was our first day of couples counceling. Sort of an assesment of what's going on and what we need. I'll wait and see what the counselor says about the situation. I'm sure she will insist on no contact or I'll want someone else to counsel us. <P>One thing that disturbs me greatly is something her sister said to her. Her sister said if she needs to call om and can't from our home, that she is welcome to call from her house. That really pisses me off. This from a woman who has had 2 bad marriages and who had an affair... <P>One day at a time...

Dear BritM:<BR>Hooray!! I really hope it works out for you. This is the first time I read on the bulletin board that a husband and wife got back together to try. <BR>It will take awhile to get back the way things use to be, but, with perserverance, honesty and most of all communication, your on the right road. <BR>God bless you on trying to make it work and hoping that it will for you. <BR>Take care. Your friend, Katya

Britn, <P>This is very good news for you. Now is the time to stay strong. Withdrawal is very tough but you can help her through it. You have a tremendous advantage by being home now in that you can show lots of loving support.<P>You're going make it; but it's going to take time.<P>SHA