Hi friends and second family,<P>Can you answer this question for me?? <P>What does it feel like to fall in love?? <P>Its been 11 years for me, and I was a teenager then. I can barely remember it after all the grief this year. <P>Thank you and prayers and hugs, <BR>Dana<P><BR>

I'll let you know when it happens

Thats it???<P>Doesn't ANYONE remember what it felt like to fall in love??? <P>To Bill....You better let me know because after all you've been thru this year, I know it will happen for you and she'll be very lucky.<P>Have we all been so hurt that we can't remember, I honestly don't know WHY I fell for my ex so I have no clue how to understand how I feel now.<P>Dana<P><BR>

I use to ask that one all the time.<BR>The response i get.... you won't ask anymore because you'll be saying I am in love.

Well, I am no expert either, but you may all want to read this page, I loved it it described what I always thought marraige should be, and love. I guess I know there are always hard times, and low times. But this would be nice........<P> <A HREF="http://www.alvernaz.com/Personal/Gravity/Book_Three/Marriage/marriage.html" TARGET=_blank>http://www.alvernaz.com/Personal/Gravity/Book_Three/Marriage/marriage.html</A>

When one of my kids asks me: "How will I know...when I'm in "love"? <P>I smile..and tell them..."You'll know".<P>There is no 'clinical' answer to your question. <P>It is the 'spark'...that lights a fire. It's difficult to explain the how's and why's of it. But once it happens, then comes the responsibility of keeping the flame alive. Cutting wood and keeping it in supply requires effort...work...consistency...<P>Producing that first spark..requires at least two objects to connect...so getting out and being around other people of the opposite sex...is a good start. <P>And when it happens....you will ...know!

I no longer believe romantic love exists. It's just lust and hormones. <P><P>------------------<BR>Blessed be.<BR>****************<BR>Keridwen<P>Keridwen_7@yahoo.com

{{{{{{Dana}}}}}}}<P>You brought up something that I have been thinking of long and hard lately. What is it like to be in love? Why do we want it? Why do we put ourselves at such risk of being hurt just for the love of another?<P>I found a quote by an unknown author which I wrote in a journal of mine that seems to put words to it:<P>"We all want to fall in love. Why? Because that experience makes us feel completely alive. Where every sense is heightened, every emotion is magnified, our everyday reality is shattered and we are flying into the heavens. It may only last a moment, an hour, an afternoon. But that doesn't diminish its balue. Because we are left with memories that we will treasure for the rest of our lives."<P>Like you, it has been quite a long time since I fell in love. I honestly admit that I hope to fall in love again someday. I don't know about marriage as of yet... but I hope to find someone that will make me feel as loved as I love him. Someone who will realize that love is so much better than the physical possessions in life. Better than money, new cars or even big screen TV's with fancy remotes to hold on to. That the best gift a person can give of themselves is their heart. Because when someone gives you that gift they are risking a hurt greater than anything else out there. We all know that.<P>But as the rest have said here already... when you are in love with someone, you will know it. And it will be wonderful. <P>I wish you all the best. Take care.<P>-Java

Your heart warms every time you see them. The sound of their voice always makes you smile. You think about them every day. You wonder what they're doing & how they're feeling. Your greatest wish is to make them happy for the rest of your life. The thought of life without them is worse than death... <P>but if they really want to leave, and you really love them, you let them go...<P> <P>------------------<BR>nick<P>it's only time that heals the pain and makes the sun come out again

HMMMMM!<P>What is love??<P>To me, it is a feeling of such contentment and peace with the other. Everything just feels right when you are holding each other. You want it to last forever. You don't want it to change. <P>Jen

What does it feel like to fall in love?<P>With David, it felt like the world was a better place with him in it. I didn't imagine that I would have children until I loved him (I was never a "kid" person). It felt like my childhood, crappy teens, and all my mistakes had been washed away and didn't matter because he loved me. It felt like I finally belonged and was part of something bigger than myself - I became a family with my spouse, his family, and then our children.<P>I'm gonna go a step further and tell you what it felt like now that I'm in another relationship... it felt like a light turned on in my wounded heart and gave it warmth, worth, and a hope that I could be loved and respected by someone. Like with David, the new man makes the world a better place by existing in it. In fact, he makes MY LITTLE WORLD a better place just by living and breathing in it. <P>I'll agree with Keridwen that lust and hormones did enter the picture, in both relationships, but at least in my case, they did not rule my heart. I've been there, done that, and know the difference.

I agree with Keridwen. "Romantic love" not only has resulted in the destruction of countless families, but also has been used as a justification for many murders and more than a few wars. <P>I realize that there is a selective advantage to the existence of the hormonal changes associated with romantic love, in order to form and strengthen the pair bond without which some of the social mammals, especially humans, would have become extinct, but as with most other traits, there is a trade-off involved.

Dana-

Dana-<BR>Sorry, I posted before I meant to. What does it feel like to fall in love? For me, with all the sadness that I am experiencing right now it is about the same thing. I have fallen in love with my H all over again. I get the butterflys in my stomach, wonder what he is doing? Is he happy? Is he thinking of me? I have many of the same physical symptoms that I had when I first started dating him. Anxiety, Fear, (Just minus the depression), and Hope. I am not familiar with your situation, so I cant really comment on that. But I do think it is different for everyone. I know that part of me is very excited to have found these emotions that I held inside for so long. I feel like a child again at times with such blind hope. Not knowing what tomorrow will bring. I am probably not explaining this very well and I am sorry. I just know that through all of the tears there is a certain amount of joy, that I have rediscovered the man that I fell in love with and all of the emotions that go along with it. <BR>arm6868@yahoo.com

Okay, for those of you who have someone "new" how did you meet them?<BR>Lighthouse, what are some of your suggestions to getting around others of the opposite sex? We've covered some ground on another thread, but I know there will always be new suggestions.<BR>I'm always hearing "it happens when you're least expecting it", but I have to get out 'cause he ain't goin to just show up on my doorstep!

Just thinking out loud... I think "love" is different for everyone and it is different for each "pairing".<P>I have loved two women in my life and married both of them. My first wife of 18 years (died at age 39) and my second wife were completely different people and my love for each of them was completely different.<P>The truth is I loved these two women for completely different reasons. And the emotions I experianced were different too.<P>I suppose that's why it's so difficult to describe love to another person. They can't feel the same exact emotions that *I* do.

I believe that we all experience love in different ways. <BR>For most of us, we felt that giddy, want to be with them all the time, can't think of anything else with our spouses when we were first together. Then came love, then came marriage, then came the baby carriage (i know there is a song in here somewhere!!). <BR>And we "lost that giddy" feeling for our spouse. Most likely it was replaced with a deeper and more fulfilling love. <BR>But it is good in a marriage to keep some of the giddiness in there. That is what the Harley principles are about. <P>------------------<BR>Susan

Hi friends,<P>Sorry I was absent to reply this weekend. Thanks for all the replies. I do agree that love is different for many of us.<P>I guess I got my question answered this weekend when I got some news that the person I am seeing told me!!!!! I was thinking I was starting myself, but scared to say something first.<P>We seem to be at the same point and I feel a lot better about that. So I asked him the same question and his reply was,<P>When you can't stop thinking of the other person, can't wait to see them, don't want to leave them, feel very worried when they are sick, feel angry towards people who hurt them, get butterflies, and just feel like everything is "right" and "peaceful" when your together.<P>This is pretty much how I felt too, just very hard to think about it after all thats happened this year. Well, there is no turning back, and I really don't want to, just to go slow and be thankful that I met someone so totally different then my ex.<P>Someone asked where you met the person you are seeing. Well I met him when I called my friends house and he answered the phone. A close male friend who didn't tell me he had a new room mate! <P>It was totally unexpected and I wasn't "looking" when we met, thats the best part.<P>Prayers and hugs, Dana<BR>

{{{{{{{{Dana}}}}}}}}<P>I am so happy for you!!! It is about time that you receive some of the happiness and joy that you deserve!!! You have been so wonderful to so many of us here. I know that there are a lot of people out here that are happy for you too!!!<P>-Java

What about infatuation? Where's that fine line???