Hi everyone,<BR>It has been a long time since I have posted. I still have been trying to keep up to date on everyone and I am so so sorry I see so many new names.<P>I do want to say Thank You to everyone over the last year. My D date was Sept. 5 and now that it has been 30 days after that date I am now officially single...It is truley a weird feeling.<P>I would like to request a few nice thoughts on Nov. 9. It would have been my 20 wedding annisversary. Oh well...the way I am looking at it now..I am young enough to share that important milestone with someone that truely loves me.<P>My EX is haveing someone he meet on the internet, while all this was going on, live with him now. They are planning THEIR Christmas together...(Update..this is his second OW, his first was work related and she has left the state)<P>I am trying to be happy. My happiness does not depend on him. I can decide if I will be happy or not. I went through the pain, the trying to bring us back together, I just need to work on walking away with my head held high.<P>I did get a nice settlement. My ex is broke, but finiancially I am doing great. I realize he makes a good income and I am happy for that because it gived me plenty for a few years, but his job was one of the reasons he started to become a stranger.<P>I pray for each and everyone of you. Our holidays to come are the hardest. <P>I am not dateing...I do not know when I will be ready too. I do not want to jump into anything untill I am ready and healed. For me getting over a almost 20 years marriage and moveing forward has been a challenge.<P>Here I am though I year later. Working full time at a great job, going back to college to get my teaching certificate, meeting new people, smiling, feeling like I am accomplishing things, spending my own money and not having to ask permission, I could go on...a year ago I could not think I would get through the next minute..I was broken and my pain for horrible. <BR>My kids are doing OK, dealing with visitation is the pits....they feel like they are living 2 lives, one here at home and one with him.<P>Just thought I would check in..I hope that you remember me!

Hi M3K,<P>I remember you from long ago. I don't post much either but am pretty much in the same place as you. I am divorced now and am dealing with visitation and really like my new independence and life.<P>I hope that you do get out and date soon. It is scarey yet exciting and can also just make you crazy. I have been dating the same person for a year and we have definitely gone through some ups and downs. I don't know if it is forever. But it has worked so far. I know how hard it is to watch our ex's live their life with their new women, but it is not our deal anymore and you have to learn to let it go.<P>Im glad that you seem to be doing well. Just keep you head up and you will be fine. Take care.<P>Gerri

Hi there my3kids,<P>long time to hear, but good to hear from you. Like you, I'm sad to see so many new names. I also haven't been posting, but I have been lurking.<P>I'm sorry to read about your divorce, but good on you for your attitude. Go conquer the world girl........<P>I'm just about to try and post an update about me and my little life, but I have my 2 1/2 yo in the room making me cups of tea and constantly interrupting. The post will surely make interesting reading if only for the interruptions that she will give me.......<P>It's so good to know that you're ok and doing ok.<BR>take care,<BR>love Jo

Wow, <P>It has been a long time. But I am happy to see that you are doing so well given the circumstances.<P>Keep your head up and draw your strength from God!!<P>God Bless, {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{my3kids}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}<P>------------------<BR><B>Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change...Courage to change the things I can...And the wisdom to know the difference.</B><P>lady_divine77@yahoo.com

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{M3K}}}}}}}}}}}}}}<P>Of course I remember you!!<P>You said you were trying to keep up on everyone, so am I!<P>I have been off the board for a few weeks, but in case you missed it, I am divorced now too. It was official in October , a few days before my wedding anniversary too. He actually got his papers ON OUR ANNIVERSARY.<P>What can you do? Fate has a way of turning out like that, seeing as he left on Xmas and served me on Valentines' Day. <P>It sounds like you are doing great for the most part. We all will struggle thru the holidays.<P>Thats why its good that you have MB to come to get some support. I know I will be thankful for it!<P>Glad to hear you did ok in the settlement. I got SCREWED, but thats ok, I'll make the best of it and be better for it in the end.<P>I am seeing someone. We have moved along as slow as we could but its to the point where we say the big L word now. Pretty scary huh???<P>I am very happy in life, as far as my kids are healthy and I have someone who is in love with me, and I love him. He's so different from my rotten miserable ex, its amazing.<P>I have learned a lot the past year, and would have to say, there was a reason for my marriage to end, not that I'm crazy about it, but you have to go on at some point.<P>I better get going, lots of posts to try to catch up on.<P>Prayers and hugs,<BR>Dana (formerly lonelymom)<BR>

Thank You all for responding! It soooo nice to be remembered.<P>Limerick, I am glad that you are doing fine. I would not mind a male friend for now to go to a movie with or dinner. But I am just trying to enjoy life with my kids. It does feel different being single and making my own decisions after 20 years. I went to a craft show today and bought a bench...no asking permission or if he liked it, I asked my daughter and she said she did and that was good enough for me. So I wrote the check with my new account in my name only with my own money and away I went.<P>The visitation is the pits. My kids are getting less and less to if they even want to go. He has been gone so long in their life. But that was his choice.<P>There is this fireman that I would not mind going out to eat with. Maybe one day he will ask...he just got divorced too.<P>Bonnet,<BR>so how is the tea party going? I miss my kids not being little anymore...I now have two divers in the family. Thanks for responding....you are a sweetie! I hope that you are doing well!<P>Jamie Lee,<BR>Hi and yes it has been a long time..it has taken me awhile just to be able to write down in print that I am divorced now. It has not been in the local paper yet..I don't know how I will handle it being in black and white. My ex does not seem happy even with the new cow, ooops OW. But she is nice to the kids...I will see how long that last. I ran into them together buying groceries...yuk...he never would go with me..oh well<BR>Let me know how you are doing!<P>Dana B,<BR>It is so great to hear from you! So you are using the L word...my my...I am sure when the time is right the L word will come back into my life.<P>Sorry you got screwed in your settlement. I did Ok, I am so lucky that I got to keep the house and the kids did not have to move. I got maintenance and child support. I am working and getting free health insurance with my job. Ex has the kids on his insurance. He is broke..but it would not make matter how much he made..he would spend it. He got mad at me for buying candy bars for Halloween trick or treaters...like it is any of his business.<P>I am so glad that you have found love...I just don't know where to look I guess...It has taken me a long time to finally see that I am worthy. When they leave you, your self worth goes down the tubes. <P>Keep in touch!