Hello all,

My sister in law, in order to make her sister "happy", went out of her her way to introduce my wife to another man as "single".

My wife has been having extended male relationships which she calls, "just friendships" but one of them offered to buy her a house and the other one bought her a house,tho not in time to save their "friendship". My wife until now has said she wanted to save our family as we have a 9 year daughter.

But after this past week at her sister's home, she has come back demanding that I move out and that she wants a divorce on Monday.

So it's finally over. I did everything I could to save my marriage but as they always say "It takes two to tango" I was unsuccessful in saving my marriage by myself.

But how many of you think it's right for the sister in law to offer new relationships to her sister before the divorce has even been filed?

Dear john1960,

What your sister in law did stinks, as far as I can tell. I don't know your whole story
but for SIL to be encouraging her to persue other men while still married to you seems
callous, thoughtless, and totally insensitive. I am constantly amazed at the depths to
which fellow human beings will stoop.

What's up with your wife and all these male 'friends' anyway? I've just gone thro some
thing similar I believe, in that my husband left me for a supposed 'friend' last November.
I've always been a firm believer in the policy of ending a current relationship BEFORE
persuing a new one. But, those of us who still believe in this motto seem to be a dying
breed, given the epidemic of broken marriages we're experiencing. If only all of our
spouses had the sensitivity to openly and honestly break off their ties with us first befire
entangling themselves in a whole new relationship... it would at least be somewhat
less cruel.

Anyways, my response is a firm "NO", your wife should NOT be passing herself off as
single while still married to you, and your SIL is an [censored] to say the least in assisting her
in that endeavour. It seems all is fair in WAR, not? I'll keep you in my prayers. Just
focus on being the best, most honest and integral person you can be. Take care. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Dear john1960,

What your sister in law did stinks, as far as I can tell. I don't know your whole story
but for SIL to be encouraging her to persue other men while still married to you seems
callous, thoughtless, and totally insensitive. I am constantly amazed at the depths to
which fellow human beings will stoop.

What's up with your wife and all these male 'friends' anyway? I've just gone thro some
thing similar I believe, in that my husband left me for a supposed 'friend' last November.
I've always been a firm believer in the policy of ending a current relationship BEFORE
persuing a new one. But, those of us who still believe in this motto seem to be a dying
breed, given the epidemic of broken marriages we're experiencing. If only all of our
spouses had the sensitivity to openly and honestly break off their ties with us first befire
entangling themselves in a whole new relationship... it would at least be somewhat
less cruel.

Anyways, my response is a firm "NO", your wife should NOT be passing herself off as
single while still married to you, and your SIL is an [censored] to say the least in assisting her
in that endeavour. It seems all is fair in WAR, not? I'll keep you in my prayers. Just
focus on being the best, most honest and integral person you can be. Take care. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Sorry about the double post! Not sure what I'm doing wrong, but will try to figure it out.

John
I understand cause I've been there.My inlaws interfered as much as they could to end my marriage and they succeed. Though I must admit that they never did what your's did but still what was did was wrong and the disloyality of your wife makes it even more wrong.I'm not one to tell people what to do with their personal problem but when my wife came and told me she was leaving I told her where the door was and never to come back.I never went back cause it was away out for me and I took it. I much happier cause I did and found someone much better.

231

<small>[ August 04, 2002, 07:05 AM: Message edited by: 231 ]</small>

my sister would do anything she could to get my away from my husband. I think she is a weasel. And no matter what she might say, if she truly had a problem with her behavior or your wife's requests, she wouldn't have done it.

I know it's hard but I think you should move and move on.

I believe that you should be D before dating. heard the rumors about X. while living at parents home trying to make our M work they were letting MOW stay with him. my family hired PI it shows everything. what could have been a friendly relationship with in-laws after D is gone. it has backfired on both X & his family, 13 yr old son doesnt want to see them anymore when we move back home in a few months. maybe in time our son will find it in his heart to forgive them.

m-17 yrs 9 months
h-42 w-48
c-13, 28, 7 gd
d-5-23-02

ow-30
m-10 yrs
c-3 under 10
d-july 2002

Thank all of you for your responses. I have moved out. There is no hope of reconciliation. My wife's attitude is "I'll stay married to you if it makes you happy, who cares about my happiness!".

Well, I want to married to someone who wants to be with me and is not forced to be with me. I wanted her decision to be hers based on her own personal choice, otherwise, staying together is of no value.

Her sister says it was all my fault. She says "If you had been a man you would have stopped her from having an affair".

Problem is, my wife never said anything about being unhappy until after I found out she was seeing another man when I came home early from work one day. I overheard her talking with her girlfriend, the GF told her it wouldn't hurt anyone to have a little fun, as long as he doesn't know (he being me of course).

Anyway, my heart is torn because this girl was for me, the love of my life. I did everything for her because I loved to see the smile on her face and I loved to make her happy. So the hard part for me is the pain I feel.

Divorce your WW and you'll also be ridding yourself of her scumbag sister and like-minded in-laws. Let the whole bunch rot.