I have this problem with my husband, too. It's so hard to find people who have the same problem. Everyone I talk to is always the opposite, "my husband wants sex five times a day!" I'm not that bad but I'm only 20 years old and would like it two or three times a week. He's usually a week and half kind of guy. I, too started to judge. I thought, well hey if I'm only getting it this much it better be great and when it wasn't I was actually angry. I have no idea why. Anyway, this disinterest of his makes me feel disgusting. I am a little over weight but when he just rolls over and goes to sleep I feel like a 400 pound ugly woman.<BR>I hounded and hounded for answers. I once convinced myself he was gay. It turns out, that because he works SO much and gets SO little sleep that he only ends up wanting it that much and even when he is well rested he doesn't like to have sex with me when I'm expecting an A+ performance.<BR>I've learned to want it less and expect less which works out great because he's learned to want it more and when I go to bed at night now he wonders why I would roll over and go to sleep. Another good tip is playing hard to get!

I've been away for awhile...<P>I don't know if there's a magic formula to turn a spouse's disinterest around...time maybe, combined with effort to meet the other's emotional needs and no pressure to get your own met? I know for myself when I am feeling insecure about something, it takes a lot of intimacy with my H. to let go of that feeling and not let it influence my behavior or attitude. <P>As for kissing, I would not focus on it. I would focus on doing things your H. likes. SInce he obviously doesn't participate in kissing, I wouldn't do it until after he did it to me. Then, later, I would go on about how great that kiss was. Maybe he would do it again.