Over on GQII, hope4future posted "the top 10 marital myths" LINK.
It's quite interesting!

The part that caught my eye was this fact: </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Half of all divorces take place by the seventh year of a marriage. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">As I posted over on GQ, this little tidbit keeps popping up for me in things I read. It's of particular interest to me, b/c my marriage fell apart during year 7. I was also talking with a friend earlier this week who also divorced after 7 years of marriage - her IC told her that the dynamic of marriages enters a different phase during year 7, and that is partly why so many divorces occur in year 7. I am curious...has anyone else heard anything similar? Has anyone read actual research to back this up?

How many of you on this board had your marital problems in year 7?

Just curious,

Jen

I don't know Jen....mine for one ended after 13 years and I have noticed many that ended after 13 years on these boards....FWIW (For what it's worth)

I have noticed a lot of people around the same time frame as me, 6yrs or so.

D-day was actually 1wk before our 6th yr anniversary so I guess you could say things have fallen apart on yr 7.

There is probably a good timeline you could put together that would show varying points in the life of a marriage when D's occur the most.

I'm thinking the first year of marriage, the first year after having a baby, 6-7yrs of marriage and probably some other times after that.

We would have been married 7 years in March.....so its true for me. I also think he is going through some midlife crisis...He says that he is in love with a woman that he has only known for 3 months. Keep in mind she has been married twice...

I think it is lust....something new and exciting...

Just false promises Sunseeker. People looking elsewhere for what they think will bring them fulfillment and satisfying it in the wrong way.

sorry, double post

<small>[ October 30, 2003, 02:29 PM: Message edited by: Drucilla ]</small>

Hi Jen,
I divorced my 1st H at the begining of our 7th year. I decided that after all that time, he just wasnt going to change. I felt that I had given in enough time, at that point.

I said to myself, "ok, this is it, this is all you are going to get from this guy, can you live with it for another 40 years?" The answer was no.

I did notice at the time that we were at the 7-year mark, gave some consideration to the 'itch' theory. But it didnt matter what I called it; I was done - Dru

Jen, I remember at the 7-year mark in our marriage that it got very rocky. I thought we recovered, but now in the 13th year, it seems as though I was mistaken. We may be headed for D. Maybe it's every 7 years???

Jen, Thanks for the link, interesting!

My H and I lived together for 10 years before marriage - I didn't want to marry him while he was still drinking and using drugs. I waited for 2 years after he got sober before we got married. In year 5 of our marriage, I was diagnosed with breast cancer, in year 7, I discovered that he had started drinking again, and in year 8 he moved out suddenly and in with MOW. So, in some ways, the timeline fits me as well.

Actually, now that some of you mention the 12-13 year mark, my H and I started dating in 1990, and married in 1995...so we'd been together 12 years and married 6.5 years when our problems came to a head.

Hmmm...

Jen

Jen I seriously thought about leaving my wife at our 7th year.

I was in a sex starved marriage despite an extremely active courtship.

I had no knowledge of her sex abuse issues so I assummed she had just slept with me regular during courtship in order to get me to marry her.

She began wanting to have kids and started taking testosterone shots hoping to boost her next to none libido. At the same time she stopped taking the pill (which also lowers female testosterone). The turnaround was great but she was pregnant in less than 3 months despite the OB/GYN warning us to be patient since she had been on the pill 7 years. In fact she told don't bother making an appointment to address fertility issues until she had been off the pill at least a year.

Of course I loved my daughter to death and as things worked out I became Mr. Mom to her and our next child.

Ironically starting the 14th year I thought about divorce again and she was entering into an affair.