I've been divorced for two years now, and have weathered the storm and come out just fine. I'm extremely thankful for all the help God has given me, and for supportive family and friends. My only 'issue' was how to deal with those years with my ex H. I started dating him when I was 21, and he left when I was 31. So 10 years of history - my entire 20's - and 3 kids later, I was having a hard time knowing how to think of that time.

At first, I just repressed any thoughts of it, as his betrayal and rejection was so painful. Then I thought of it as just a big lie, since he was cheating on me throughout our married life, I just didn't know it. I just finished a great Beth Moore study (Beloved Disciple) and she talked about how God is the God of your "was" (past) "is" (present) and your "to be."(future, obviously) She said we can't go back to our 'was' but God can, to help us heal. That made me realize that God was in charge of my life then too, and that if I deny that entire time of my life, I'm denying God in a way, saying my circumstances were bigger than He is. And *I* wasn't living a lie just because my ex was. I was trying my best and following God and doing what I thought was right. (Disclaimer - I know I wasn't perfect and contributed to his decision to cheat in someway and would change a lot of things.)

That helped me immensely as I deal with those years. I've even begun praying that he returns to his Christian faith for my children's sake - for a long time I felt like if he repented and was forgiven, it wouldn't be fair and his presence in heaven would ruin my whole experience. hehehe. So anyway, I just wanted to share my little breakthrough. Thanks for listening. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />
Krista

Like you, we all shall weather the storm. I am newly divorced, and I am still having a hard time dealing with my X. Probably because he makes himself at home here, without asking. But once I move, it will definitely be my house, and he will have to ask to come over. Right now, I just am so tired of fighting him for everything.

Glad that you too have given your life to Christ. I have given it to Christ, and right now I don't want to fight him anymore. I am just sticking to my boundaries, and he is going to have to start doing things according to the divorce papers, or I will file. Then when (not if) WHEN I win, he will have to pay the attorney fees, and court costs.

So good to hear others that have given their life totally to God. I am still working on it, and am getting closer. I wish my kids would go with me to church, but they are 17-25 (4 in all) and they don't want to attend. Sad, but I will continue, and hopefully they will see the path that I am following. And succumb to the Lord. If not, they will have to suffer the consequences. I am praying for them, and for my X. But I am moving forward.

Have you noticed on this forum, when there seems to be a big breakthrough, it is usually with God. Awesome, to see and hear. Love it!!!

Hi WIMN! Thank you for sharing this. It sure was refreshing to read that and I hadn't looked at my 'Past' like that - thank you again!
May the Lord continue to bless you.
Harold