Does anyone know if a person can receive counseling anonymously? By that I mean, can you give a fake name and pay in cash, so no one knows? Or do counselors check your ID? Do they tape the sessions?

The reason I ask, is that I am a state police officer and if my department were to learn that I am seeking mental help, it could be bad...very bad. They are very worried about an unstable cop on the street, which is understandable. My problems (see my "Hello" post if interested) have absolutely no effect on my official duties, but you never know how they will react.

I'm scared of all these databases nowadays. I know that when you fill a prescription, everybody and their brother knows what drug you bought and what it is for.

Thanks

Karen

Several things to consider...
1) The counselor/patient confidentiality privilege

2) If you use your health insurance to pay for any counseling, it may be described as "mental health" expense. Each time you see any doctor, they use a universal code to delegate the expenses and diagnosis. This could become part of your employment history, too. Counseling quite often falls under the "mental health" category. DO NOT let this stop you from getting counseling, however.

3) If you choose to not file insurance, then you have more confidentiality.

4) I'm not sure what type of counseling you are inquiring about...the Harleys here at MB are pretty confidential, over the phone, and the few "visits" I had counseling with Steve were worth WAY MORE than the previous year of face-to-face counseling with someone here in person.

Bottom line, I think it's safe as long as you pay out of pocket and don't go through the insurance and employment systems.

<small>[ January 28, 2004, 07:34 PM: Message edited by: avondale25 ]</small>

Karen -
I know that the Harley's (this website) offer counseling. Is it possible for you to check with your employee EAP program? I don't think that getting counseling to help with issues from your divorce would label you mentally "unstable". If you are like me - no one ever knew I was in counseling nor did it ever show up in my work. Or you could try a group counseling forum at a church.

I really think it's worth a shot for you. It's not so much as the doctor "fixes" you rather than you getting to take a really hard look at what you feel & how to work through it. It really is worth looking into. You might even be surprised at how many fellow officers have gone through counseling.

Let us know what you find.
Vee

Thank you, avondale. I don't know if my health insurance even covers mental health, but that would be out of the question. I might as well wear a sign at work saying I'm in counseling.

I would be interested in Dr Harley, but if they are marriage counselers, that wouldn't apply as my marriage ended in 1993. I need help with the aftermath of my divorce. Plus any phone counseling would have to involve a credit card, right? They would then know my identity, and I could end up in a database accessable to my employer.

Karen

Thank you, Vee, for your insight and support.
If I can do it anonymously, I'm definitly going to do it. I have to do something.

<<You might even be surprised at how many fellow officers have gone through counseling>>

That is what I'm afraid of! I know a young trooper who sought help, and wishes he hadn't.
It took a very good lawyer to get him his job back. The department has "approved" mental health issues (grief, etc). And others they better not find out about. I don't know which category I would come under, and I can't risk it.

Karen

No, you're mistaken about paying the Harleys. I think you can pay by check or money order in advance, and remain anonymous to others that way.

You may want to call (or send a brief email) about what you're looking for from counseling to them, and see if it's something they could help you with.

I know there is another counselor I've heard of, who does "life" counseling (might be more what you're looking for) but I cannot remember that website. Maybe someone else (or even the Harleys) know of it...?

Oh, and to clarify my first post. I don't think that insurance/employers look at all counseling in order to label someone "mentally unstable"... it's just the lack of choices there are in the system to differentiate between different types of counseling that can make it appear that way. Many times counseling is just its own category, and we all recognize that marriage counseling is different from depression; but the system can lump all counseling together under the same "code".

Thanks again, avondale, for your helpful advice.

I know I sound paranoid about this but police agencies are not like most employers. They keep a pretty close watch on us. A personal example, I couldn't stand living in "our" house so I sold it and bought this one. My very generous daddy gave me a lot of help buying it and it is a very nice house. Too nice. I didn't even have the dishes put away and I was called in to explain (and prove) where I got the money. They have to do it, I guess, there's nothing worse than a crooked cop.

Karen

Karen -
Good luck. I have heard wonderful things about the Harley's. I think that is probably your best option. That way no one will ever know! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

That is terribly sad about your department. IMHO, it should be the people not seeking help the department should worry about! At least people who seek help want it and are certainly aware of how it'll affect things!

Vee