So my H finally decided to work on the DV paperwork. I didn't want a DV at first, but I no longer want to be tied to this loser.

Still, knowing that he is now working on the paperwork makes me mad. I should be the one divorcing him.

He wants to do this simplified form that basically says that we keep everything that we have now that is our own and that's it since we don't have any marital property.

I know it's probably the right way to go since doing it any other way would just make it more expensive but it makes me angry that he's getting the better end of the deal.

He says I can still "visit" my cat when I want to, but I don't want to ever see him after this is all done. He was smart enough to buy all of the good stuff.. like t.v., computer, sound system, and other things like that a few months before we got married.

I mean this guy left me for a 15 year old. Where is the justice in him getting off with everything. It just sucks!

isn't that illegal?

very... I told the girl's parents but they never really did anything about it... She's still his student...

Ivory,

Together 8 years? Didn't that make you 16 or 17 and him 20 or 21?

What do you mean she is still his student? You mean literally? As in school teacher?

If he has been with you since you were 16 and now he has cheated on you with a 15 year old I smell pedophile...

I mean he was dating a minor in you, and even though a 20-21 year old has no business with a 16-17 year old you can almost see it...but a 28 year old and a 15 year old? Maybe since she was 14 as well? It's time to involve the law and/or school board. Sounds predatory to me

Hey Ivory...

Sounds like our x's should get together. My WH, who is 31, left me for a 2003 high school graduate who exposed herself on her webcam while chatting online with him....nice, eh?

With regards to legalities, go get a lawyer to at least advice you on basic stuff. I was also tentative about this but was forced to hire one after I was misrepresented by a mediator who was actually serving as my WH's lawyer. Also, I had a lot of questions about money/financial stuff that didn't add up. I had given WH 1/2 my business account in June (a couple weeks post d-day) and he also conveniently asked for 5k of my business money for hair surgery about a week before he left me...he left all the furniture, which most of it was cheap garage sale crap or given to us for free, and he wanted to call things even???? I don't really care about material sh*t but do believe in what is right and I felt violated in all ways, including with regards to the money so I hired a lawyer to help determine what a fair 50/50 split is. WH actually meets with my lawyer next month to get the scoop as to what is legally fair. I have since removed myself from that end as dealing with my emotions stemming back to feeling rejected/hurt by WH have been more than enough to handle and I don't need anymore added stress. Anyways, a lawyer will just ensure that your rights are protected.

Hope all else is well and that you are holding up....I know things are hard (I am right there with you) but with time, we will heal 100% and realize that there is something better out there for us.

-K

PS...will be back in Chi-town probably late summer!

Me: 28 yo FW
Him: 31 yo WH
Married: 3.5 years, together 5
His Affairs: 1) with coworker fall 03, 2) with 2003 HS graduate he met April 04 when she exposed herself on her webcam and was chatting with him online.
D-day: May 23, 2004. Plan A thru Oct, Plan B thru Dec. Divorce papers served by WH a couple days before Christmas. OW reported to her commanding officer by me Jan 05 and I have since been shunned from WH's family cuz all of a sudden I am the "evil" person ruining lives...they're backwards I am afraid.

He coaches for a few park districts around here. The girl is 16 was 15 when it started.

I met him when I had just turned 17 and he was 19 just turning 20.

I wish I could afford a lawyer. I might have to ask for help with that from my family.

Hey K! Give me a call or an e-mail when you get in.

Ivory,

I coach baseball here and let me tell you, you need to inform the leagues he coach's in what he is doing. That truly disgusts me because you can't imagine how hard it was for us male coaches to be trusted to coach the girls. Personally I didn't want to becuase of the obvious reasons but there weren't enough women willing to do it.

So now when I coach I always have a mom or dad around, besides the other coaches so there will be no accusations nor chances for any hanky panky. Not that I would but you never know what others are capable of....

Your STBX is my worst nightmare and he needs to be reported Ivory. He is a predator...think about it for everyone that gets reported how many go unreported? There is no excuse for his actions, she is a minor and he was supposed to be a trusted father figure to those girls, a mentor, not a sex partner...

Makes me sick, please report this bastid

Reborn

I've already told her parents everything. I let them decide what to do since it was their daughter that would have to go through the spotlight with this. They chose to do nothing and continue to allow her to take his class.

I've thought about telling the park district but then he'd know it was me who informed them. I would be blamed for ruining even more of his life and distroying his career and so forth.

What your STBX is doing really makes me angry!

I have a 15 1/2 year old, and I struggle with the fact that she hangs out with 21-yr-old friends from time to time because I think THEY are too old (as does her therapist!).

A 12-year age gap between a 16-yr-old and a 28-yr-old is just plain wrong!

Is there any way somehow this could anonymously be reported? Does anyone else know what's going on besides you, him, and then girl's parents who are in denial?

LL

So, you don't report it. He dumps this child and messes up another girl's life.

What's right with that picture?