Zebra,<BR>You out there this is still marriage builders in case you thought you were in the wrong place. How are things going we havnt seen you in a while? Hope your family is o.k. pop in and let us know. with love flowerseed

I second that!!!!!!!!!Gabi1116

WOW, you don't know what a smile it put on my face to see a post with my name on it. It feels damn good to know you ladies were thinking about me.<P>I've been shying away from this mess on the forum. I can't stand the thought of letting "women" who don't feel my pain read about my pain and then possibly write me nasty comments for a response. <P>I just hope it all just disappears, poof! and things can get back to normal around here.<P>The kids are great. Son has kindergarden placement testing tomorrow and Daughter's 2nd. birthday is tomorrow too! <P>We attended my H's grandfather's funeral yesterday. He died on Saturday, but lived to the ripe old age of 97. And believe it or not his mind was sharp as a knife. Was telling stories up until his last days. I'll share a funny one under another thread.<P>H and I struggle along and just trying to, as my husband likes to put it, stay the course. <P>Been feeling a bit needy lately and down in the dumps. Probably because I'm on vacation. Too much time to think. I'm thinking about going to see my OB/GYN and see if she'll write me a script for Prozac or something if I don't feel better after I go back to work next week. My insurance won't cover psychiatric care, but my OB/GYN and I have a special relationship. I think she'd write the script.<P>But that's the excitement in my life. Hope all is well with all the lovely women here that are here for BUILDING MARRIAGES AND NOT TEARING THEM DOWN!!!<P>Remember, I'm lurking and missing you all terribly.<BR><P>------------------<BR>Zebra Baby ...<P>Lord, give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Zebra,<P>I'm glad you are doing ok right now. I know, it's a rollercoaster, but soon those turns and hill will get smoother and smoother! I think your are right about being in the dumps having to do with being on vacation, and having too much time to think about things. Deffinately wait till you are back into the thick of things at work before you go on any meds. Hope you are feeling more like yourself soon.<P>Love,<P>Tigger

Hello zebra,<BR>Glad your still with us I was beginning to worry. I to would wait until you geyt back to work. I know when I am not keeping busy my mind gets to wandering. Just keep hanging in there. with love flowerseed

zebrababy, just for curiosity and to understand where you are in your healing. How long has it been since you discovered the affair and OC? how old is the OC? do you have contact with the OC? I know what you mean by antidepressants. I saw my OB/gyn today for annual pap, etc. and he and I go back nearly 20 years. He knows me so well, was surprised i had lost 12 pounds from normal weight, very thin, saw I wasn't my usually happy self. He kept trying to figure out what was upsetting me, but I just couldn't tell him. He is doing extra blood work to make sure nothing is wrong,I came very close to telling him and asking for antidepressant, but will wait and see how I do. He did say nothing that stresses you should affect your health,a nd that was helpful, after telling me a story of friends of his losing their only son who was killed at one of the university shootings lately.Said the mother of child is losing weight, depressed, I thought, that would be worse than OC/affair. Keep at it, zebrababy.

lsb,<BR>my d-day was dec 15, 2000, two days after my birthday. btw, i ran across the b-day card h gave me last year. whata crock of s**t. LOL. anyway, we have contact with OC. Initially I was the point person for contact. I found that it was too stressful. it was a constant reminder and I felt like I hadn't had sufficient time to heal from the affair let alone deal with the OW/OC crap. So I have excluded myself from the whole mess temporarily. We used to get OC every other weekend. Now he has only got her once in the last month and it was for a couple of hours when I was at work. OC is 9mths. old. She was conceived three months after I gave birth to our daughter.<P>As far as the meds, Tigger4jtd & Flowerseed, I will stick it out until I get back to work next week. It doesn't help that I'm PMS'ing right now.<P><BR>Well, thanks again for all the well wishes ladies. It means more than you could ever know.<BR><P>------------------<BR>Zebra Baby ...<P>Lord, give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Been feeling a bit needy lately and down in the dumps. Probably because I'm on vacation. Too much time to think. I'm thinking about going to see my OB/GYN and see if she'll write me a script for Prozac or something if I don't feel better after I go back to work next week. My insurance won't cover psychiatric care, but my OB/GYN and I have a special relationship. I think she'd write the script<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Zebrababy you get that "sera-fem" 20 mg. from your ob-gyn. Oh my goodness what a difference it has made. I still cry and feel rotten SOMETIMES but believe me the prozac in disguise works. I felt it from day one.<P>ISB, I told my ob-gyn about everything when I dragged myself there about 10 days after I found out. I didn't have an appointment and walked in like a freaking zombie asking to see Dr. I said it was personal. Well the nurse overheard me begging to see him and put everything on hold and got me in. I think they thought I was raped!<P>I blurted everything to the nurse as she lead me to the examining room....in horrible tears. I asked for an std work up and aids test. My Dr. complied. He was so kind and understanding. Knowing how long I've been married he explained how my H was still writing everyday to say he was sorry and loved me. Ob-gyn said it's like you have a favorite food say...angelhair pasta marinara....you have it every day. You love it! One day you see a pork chop and try it. It was good but not like that angelhair pasta. <P>Men sometimes make foolish mistakes at your H's age. Some buy a motorcycle..or a sports car...others make a grave mistake. He probably does love you and sees what a horrible mistake he made. Maybe you will be willing to speak to him someday soon.<P>Then after the aids test the nurse said "Lets have a hug, Debi" and I cried like a baby in her arms.<P>Update...when I called for Sera-fem they already knew what was up and readily gave it to me. It has made a world of difference in that I no longer get down so low I can't get up. I did however suffer from pmdd. aka pms.<P>Please give it a try all you doubters and give it a week or two to kick in full gear.<P>Debi<P>------------------<BR>Imagine....

Dear Zebra,<P>Just wanted to say happy birthday to your daughter and I am sending good wishes your way. Do whatever it takes to make yourself happy. Keep yourself active and I am sure you will get through this slump just fine.<P>You are sorely missed.<P>love,<BR>heavenly

Gem, thanks for your advice on the meds. Like Heavenly said, I'm normally able to pull myself out of slumps quite easily. I really do think it's too much time on my hands. Normally free time is sooooo valuable I don't dare waste it on thinking about crap. I'm gonna give next week a shot if I'm not back to my old self I'll call.<P>Heavenly, sweetie I missed you too. Thank you so much for the Birthday wishes to my daughter. I'm sending you a message on the "other" board.<P>------------------<BR>Zebra Baby ...<P>Lord, give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Hi Zebrababy,<P>Just wanted to add my thoughts that Im glad you are back.<BR>I hope all continues to go well for you and H.<BR>It is a constant work in progress, I realize now. <BR>But it helps to come here and talk to wonderful women<BR>who are feeling the same way as me. Take Care! fluke<P>

Zebra,<BR>HAPPY BITRHDAY to your little girl! 2 yr olds are so much fun! Have a great day. with love flowerseed

Happy Birthday to Zebra's little girl.<BR>hope all is well momasita