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#808732 02/15/02 07:48 PM
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Well, ow's engagement was bogus. She still thinks H believes she's getting married,but he now knows she was trying to get to him. Also, she called him the other day and asked him if he'd go somewhere with her to make another guy jealous.How old are we? All in our thirties. Also I now know that H saw oc without me about a month ago after he promised he wouldn't. Ow is still calling excessively ,now for the money we can't afford to give her.H cut her child support in half 2 months ago.No it's not court ordered and he was giving her 3 times what he had to. We are still in therapy,but I think he listens while he's there and then forgets as we leave. I really have no hope for this situation. H is acting better towards me,but it's not enough.

#808733 02/16/02 02:53 PM
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just bumping up hoping someone will reply!

#808734 02/16/02 03:09 PM
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I don't know your story but sometimes so much damage is done you have to cut your losses. I am in the process of doing that now. Have you tried individual counseling? I have been going for the last few months and it has helped A LOT!!! I find myself getting stronger and stronger everyday.<p>McKenzie

#808735 02/18/02 08:05 AM
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My therapist says I have only 2 options with H at this point. a) Continue coulpes therapy and work on making the relationship better in spite of the ow or b) leave H and tell him that until all of this communication with ow stops permatedly, it's over.<p>I already said this to him 10 weeks ago after d-day. The problem is he still denies the continued affair. H edoesn't take off for a day or even hours anymore like he used to to see the baby. He is more affectionate, BUT now he is keeping his phone conversations a secret.Going as far as deleting her calls from the office caller-id. I am just tired!

#808736 02/18/02 08:11 AM
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I meant permanetly! THat still doesn't look right .Oh well!

#808737 02/18/02 11:03 AM
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Blue,<p>Do you think it's time to do a firm plan B? I think H will continue to do whatever he wants because you allow it. I hope this doesn't sound harsh. Right now my marraige is in strong recovery, the reason why is because I put my foot down and if H tried to cross the line I didn't budge even if it meant losing our marriage. I felt I gave in enough and if was willing to accept OC in our lives then it was going to be in a way that I was satisfied with. I'm not saying I didn't need to make changes but if I felt like I was being disrespected in any way I wasn't having it. Good luck. Keep praying for strenght to do whats right.<p>Unsure

#808738 02/18/02 02:00 PM
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I believe he thinks that I don't know he's seen the baby. I don't know for sure, but the continued phone contact and all of the bs games is enough. He will not put his foot down with her. And why?

#808739 02/19/02 09:16 AM
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