HA! You probably thought I was pregnant....it's not meeeee.

Ok, this is a much needed update. Last I posted, MM and his W were transferring to a new duty station…locally. I was apprehensive and so was his W, I’m sure. Well, it didn’t happen. MM’s orders were changed at the last minute and he went East Coast instead of West Coast. He didn’t know why…it just happened. I was disappointed, believe it or not. I had already psyched myself out for the changes and was prepared. I was excited for Jonas, and his dad was looking forward to some one on one time with him. BS and I were also looking forward to getting to know each other better…in person. I know that sounds strange. I’ve never been one to fit the mold. Anyway, MM moved to the East Coast and we all dealt with it. BS was awfully quiet during this period and I didn’t really know why. Finally, after a few weeks, she confided in me. It was a very honest moment. It turns out that the move to the East Coast was not just the government being the government. She became very anxious about the move and H’s close proximity to me. She panicked. So, BS called the Chaplain and explained her anxiety. She feared for her marriage. She believed that the pull of having me and Jonas so close by would be hard for H to resist, which would weaken the marriage even more. I was so exasperated by this revelation. I told her that I would not fall into anything with her H ever again. She said her concern did not extend to me, but to her H. It was HIS weakness that led to the affair, not mine. Hence, her conversation with the Chaplain and subsequent request for intervention. It appears that in the military, the Chaplain has a lot of pull. He put in a request for the orders to be changed. BS, even though she initially thought she was ready for this, was apparently not ready after all. It was a disappointing moment, but if that’s how she feels, that’s how she feels. Once they settled in, she felt pretty bad. She feels that her moment of insecurity has robbed H and Jonas of their time together. I see it as just buying a little more needed time for her marriage to recover. She did what she needed to do. I didn’t want to dwell on it. Fast-forward a couple of months. BS asks me to guess why she was so emotional, insecure, and just out of sorts. I have no clue….at first, but she sounds so giddy and excited, I figured “what the hell”. So I blurt out “You’re pregnant.” She was and still is. Thank God! She’s suffered numerous miscarriages. She’s due next month. This is their first child and they are ecstatic. I have to admit I was a little envious of their shared joy, but not enough for it to be an issue. I’m happy for them. Jonas will have a sister by this time next month. In between all these “events”, MM and W have continued their efforts to demonstrate their wish for involvement and desire to be a part of my…our…Little guy’s life. They call. They write. They send pictures. They send the occasional gift. Just a couple of weeks ago, Jonas received a greeting card from them….just to let him know they were thinking of him. Their tireless efforts go such a long way with me.

Ok, so now about me. After last summer’s fiasco with ex-BF, I was laying low. I had no interest in dating or even dealing with any men. I focused on Jonas, work, and my classes. Well, I don’t know how it happened, dang it all, but I met somebody. Actually, I already knew him. He’s been under my nose for the last 4 years, I just never looked. He’s a really good guy and spoils the hell out of me. He cooks. He cleans. He makes my bed. HE BRINGS ME STARBUCKS!!!!! But more importantly, he’s absolutely wonderful with Jonas. Jonas, I’m afraid to say, has already gotten attached. I think they plotted against me. End result: I think he’s a keeper. Time will tell.

OB1,

I am so happy for you! You really needed this, especially after last year! Have you share the MB principles w/him yet? I think that it's a wonderful thing to start out a serious relationship with, and if you both use them, you will be successful! I hope that some day, you will join the rest of us in our M's that we have built/rebuilt from the ground up, and hope you get that little girl that you so long for! Sometimes, what's best for us is always under our noses, we just have to lower our heads to see it!(j/k)

Love,

Tigger

Dear OB,

Okay, no pitter patter of little feet for you now, but, who knows what the near future will bring, eh???

What wonderful news, OB! You were so devastated over the ex-BF. I prayed so much for you during that time and now I hope that God has answered your prayers and sent you someone to complete your family.

I can understand your feelings of disappointment over MM's change of assignment. It would have been good for Jonas to spend time with him. But, I can tell you from my own experience, after all the attempts of his W to have a child, she needs to celebrate this victory with her H. This is such a special moment for her and it is sometimes very difficult to deal with the fact that your H has already had this special moment with someone else.

Ohbratti, I wish you were my H's ex-OW. You have dealt with your feelings so well and organized your life. You deserve all of the happiness that the new BF is bringing you.

Cooks...Cleans...brings Starbucks...this man was sent by God. Enjoy him, enjoy your son, enjoy the wonder of making a new family.

love,
heavenly

Oh My! OhBratti!!

You gave me quite a start...hahaha.

What and interesting turn of events, OB. It bet it was kind of a big let down after getting yourself all pumped up to acept all this and have it come to nothing. How did Jonas handle it? Was he real disappointed or is he still a little too young to understand?

I am so entirely thrilled for you, OB that you have found someone so wonderful. And he's been right there under your nose for 4 years? Wow. this is really great news. So what is the arrangement? Exclusive dating? Talks of something more permanent?

God, Ohbratti, I live for stuff like this. Do a 'soap' for us and post every week a new episode of your romance.

I'll e-mail you tonight.

Catnip =^^=

OB1,

I just to tell you I'm happy that you found someone with such great qualities. Good luck! And I admire the way you are so happy and honest about your feeling for exMM and his wife. I pray and hope Jonas and his sister are close.

Unsure

My reaction to this news is WHAT A RELIEF! It's a relief for all of you--all the way around. It's even okay for little Jonas because it will lessen his confusion as to why his "daddy" doesn't live with him... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" /> You know?

And you can raise him any way YOU see fit, although I'm sure they would not interfere with your parenting, at least, it doesn't sound like it.

I'm so glad xMM's W had the GOOD SENSE to take steps to protect her marriage!!! GOOD FOR HER! To me, that was WISE, regardless if she thought she was feeling weak or insecure or afraid, it was plain old wise... Couldn't have been wiser.

I'm sure you will get over your temporary disappointment, it's for the best. I really believe that. I can say it's for the best because I lived it and my OC is all grown up.

When he was a baby, he immediately noticed his life was different (no dad) and he said so as soon as he could talk. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> But I looked at so many of my friends who were coparenting with their ex's and FIGHTING over trivial stuff. Not that you would be like that, but I just think there would be opportunities for emotions to arise that don't need to be there--positive OR negative and the little one caught in the middle.

I think it's for the best. I hope they can rebuild and at least Jonas will know that he is loved and accepted by his bio father, even tho the rejection he will experience is inevitable. You sound like you will be a good mom to help him get through this whole thing unscathed. I wish you all God's best from this day forward!

Obratto. although I know you did not know your MM was married at first when you got involved, I can well understand his wife's reluctance to be so close to you all, I doubt it will ever feel natural for her to be so involved with you.

I think it is wonderful for your life and JOnas's to have such a neat man around. I hope he is a keeper. JOnas' could only benefit from this guy.

I am wishing the best for you.