Lapiene--sorry, reread your post and found that you specified "in person" counseling.<P>Isn't there a referral service in the Marriage Builders forum for MB certified counselors in your area? I remember looking for one in the beginning and there weren't any in my neck of the woods. <P>If not, I would still consider looking into the phone session counseling with a Harley. <P>acacia,<P>I am so glad you found a wonderful counselor to help you with your marriage. It's a rare thing. The first thing my non-Harley fully accredited-multi-diploma'd counselor told me was that she didn't see what the problem was with the coworking situation between my H and the OW.
<P>I know a four other counselors on a personal bases due to my profession (who I would not dream of going to! One is actually having an affair). They are human just like everyone else. They are well educated but sometimes make calls and judgements based on their own personal experiences and predjudices. Heaven help the couple where either the W or the H remind the counselor of their own ex-spouse or mother they never got along with. <P> They've taken courses and classes and seminars but Harley principles are a pathway that those other psych lessons just don't offer. <P> Some have never encountered the specific concerns your marriage has and don't really know how to deal with them. <P>Some counselors are just flying by the seat of their pants when they're handing out advice in unfamiliar territory. <P>I think marriages deserve better than that since they are the sanctioned by God, are the basic foundation of families, thus communities, thus nations, etc., etc.<P>And I've read too many threads where a person's counselor has: encouraged them to date (others!), give up/get a divorce, gotten sexually attracted, gotten judgemental and accusatory, etc. And I've only been here for four months! <P>Finding an counselor is crucial--but it should be done with as much care as you would make any life decision. That's why I'm going Harley--a phone session may be awkward (I don't know yet) but it beats what I've seen everywhere else hands down if it helps to rebuild our marriage.<BR> <BR>God Bless and good luck to you in yours.<BR> <BR>Aloha,<P>L<BR>