Hi MB Buddies!<P>Firestorm and I are leaving at lunchtime to go away for a few days to celebrate our 24th anniversay on December 3rd. Basically I guess we will celebrate having a normal marriage for 22+ years and also celebrate surviving the past 1 1/2 years!<P>We'll be checking in when we get home on Sunday evening, and I hope we will have some positive news to share with all of you who have come to mean so much to us. We are taking the Relationship Rescue Workbook with us, but basically plan for 4 days of just being together. We plan to do our Christmas shopping (I am married to one of those rare men who LOVES to shop, much more than I do in fact), take some long walks, go to dinner is some good restaurants that we both like, sleep late, etc. This is sounding better all the time!<P>Because we never know what the future may hold or long the time we have left is, I want to take this chance to tell you all how much I have come to care about this forum and the people who post here. Every one of you is a real person to me, not just some anonymous writer. I ache with you, cry with you, laugh with you, and celebrate with you all. I feel like I really know you and what you are experiencing. Some of you have helped me so very much with advice, kind words, and prayers. It just feels so good to have people to share this experience with who really understand. After all, sharing grief does divide it!<P>I have been here for well over a year, and I couldn't possibly name everyone who has said something to help me make it to this point. I would like to especially thank Lonestar, DuncanMac and Suse, New Beginning, NSR, Lostva, Soulloss, Patient Love, Wasstubborn, FaithHopeLove, HGBrawner, and K. You all were posting here when I first found this site and registered. You all gave me hope that this was survivable. Many others joined this site after I did and have also lent their support to me. I am so very thankful for the Harley's (especially Steve), and the work they do to build marriages. But I am especially thankful that on October 3, 1999 I started doing a search to try to find something to help me cope with infidelity, and found this forum and everyone here.<P>I hope and pray that we will each find some peace and happiness in our lives very soon. You all will be in my thoughts and prayers.<P>Love to all of you,<P>Peppermint

Have a glorious time !!!!<P>You are both very precious.

Without the kids? Pepper, please give yourself permission to just go and have a great time. Maybe not even take "recovery" books?<P>I have used these trips even as breaks from "recovering". Hope you have a great time and I appreciate you too...

Peppermint and Firestorm,<BR>This post is so encouraging and gives the rest of us hope. Like a breath of fresh air. I wish you the best anniversary. <P>I looked at the recovery wookbook last night at the store, but my H hates to fill out forms, so I didn't get it. He is trying very sucessfully to be caring and attentive, it is me that has put up a barrier so as not to be hurt again. <P> FS, did you resent it when P asked questions? I have been told to forget it all, but that seems to demean my emotions and pain. I am trying not to talk about it until we see our counselor again, but I wonder everyday if she is calling him at work or they are meeting for lunch (he can come and go as he pleases at this new job) <P>Have a wonderful time. L

Congratulations to both of you! Have a wonderful time, and focus on the wonderful future that you will have, together!<P>Am praying that next June, I'll be able to post a similar thread about H and I celebrating our 10th!

Have a wonderful time!!!<P>

<B>Peppermint</B><P>Have a wonderful time. I look forward to seeing your updated post.<P>I have to tell you I am a little envious. He is working Saturday night and Sunday will be a recovery from long work week day. Still I think we should have some special moments. Daughter is going to a slumber party. <P>So happy that the two of you get to go celebrate the years you have been together and enjoy the love you to have.<P>Hugs,<P>Samantha<p>[This message has been edited by A blessed Samantha (edited November 30, 2000).]

My most sincere congratulations to the two of you! I wish you both a weekend (and lifetime) of happiness. You've inspired a lot of us here, and we're grateful for your wise words and shared experiences. God Bless!

<BR>Happy Anniversary!<BR>I'm so glad you are celebrating.

Peppermint & Firestorm<P>Happy 24th Anniversary!! Just think of this - next year when you look back on this anniversary - it will be one you remember because it was so full of love and caring for and needing each other.<P>Our 24th will be Dec 4 - and just like you - we had 22+ years of what we though was a good marriage. I am looking so much more forward to this year's anniv - it will just be he & I w/o the OP tainting it. Just think how wonderful our 25th will be after all the love and closeness we get this next year.<P>Remember our vows 24 yrs ago: for "better or worse" and "in sickness & health". Well, we are still married - we stuck to our vows for better or worse AND we have stuck together through this horrible sickness inflicted on us! You know, maybe we really have honored our vows more than we thought!!!!<P>Have a great time!<P>Sudz

Peppermint and Firestorm,<P>Happy anniversary!!!!<P>I hope you have a wonderful time reconnecting and just being together. Sometimes that is the best thing in the world - just being...<P>God Bless you both <P>Here's to a safe return and an uplifting post when you return.<P>------------------<BR>Love and Prayers<BR>Nicole

Happy Anniversay!!! <P>And Ditto on the nice words you had for our friends here on MB!

Hi all,<P>We got back early this afternoon. We actually came home earlier than we planned because a winter storm is in the Southeast right over NC and we tried to beat the bad weather. We live in the southeastern part of the state and have a few inches of snow, sleet, and freezing rain right now.<P>The weekend was okay. We had those long walks and nice dinners we planned and got a HUGE amount of shopping done. Overall everything was really pleasant, but we both tried a little too hard and maybe our expectations for a "perfect" anniversary weekend put a little too much pressure on the whole situation. Still, it was nice to get away from the "scene of the crime" and relax a bit. It is another step forward and towards the future anyway. This is my second anniversary since I first discovered the affair, but this one was definitely harder than last year. I guess I'll just be glad when it is over and I have survived!<P>Lor, schizzo, hurtinginil, Kathi, Carolina Belle, wasstubborn, Patient Love, and FHL: Thanks for the kind thoughts and well wishes. Your support is very much appreciated.<P>LAD,<P>We never even opened the workbook. I think we were afraid it might bring up unpleasant subjects and cause hurt feelings or a disagreement. We definitely plan to tackle it this week, and I'll let you know if it helps. Yes, firestorm did get resentful and angry when I asked him questions. I don't ask very much anymore because it is difficult for him to admit things about the affair that he is deeply ashamed of, and the answers don't help anyway. Who told you to forget all about it? Don't you wish it was really that easy to do? Definitely talk to your counselor about this. I understand the constant fears about contact. Supposedly they get easier, but it hasn't happened yet for me.<P>Samantha,<P>Happy Anniversary!! I hope it was as good as you hoped and that you will have many more. AND I hope we'll keep celebrating them at MB!<P>Sudz,<P>Happy Anniversary!! I hope that next year will bring better memories of Dec. 3rd. This is my second anniversary since I discovered firestorm's unfaithfulness, but it is the first since I found out he had sex with another woman. It has been very hard for me today. I remember last year on this day actually discussing that on this anniversary we would be able to look back and measure our recovery progress. The reignition of the affair has definitely set us back, but I have honored my vows and kept my promises. I am proud of that, and of the effort we have both made this time around. Our progress is slow, but steady. Thanks for your kind words.<P>Love to you all,<P>Peppermint

Peppermint,<P>Glad to see you and Firestorm back home safe and sound...<BR>I know what you mean about high expectations. I had them for my anniversary last March...what a dope I was...he was just barely coming out of the fog and hadn't even ended things with OW completely yet. <BR>You guys are doing great. You both know the road ahead is not always going to be easy but you are prepared for it. You also both know that recovery is posible and are looking forward to it! <BR>Keep a positive attitude - some days it's the little extra push that gets you through.<P>------------------<BR>Love and Prayers<BR>Nicole <p>[This message has been edited by Patient Love (edited December 05, 2000).]