I've noticed that a lot of [censored] has hit the fans in many marriages on or VERY close to special events (like birthdays and holidays). <P>How many of you out there have experienced this?<P>I am one. I kicked my WH out on the day before his birthday (in my case, the final blowup came when I caught him in lies about what he was doing for his b-day... basically, he was choosing for OW#1 to take him out to dinner instead of spending the day with his son... the A was in the early stages of EA at the time).<P>Karen<BR>

My H told me the marriage was over on the morning of our 14th Wedding Anniversary.<P>Jo

My W told me she was hoping that I'd be served papers on my 40th B-Day. She missed by 3 days (late). On the other hand, for her 40th B-Day 2 years earlier, she insisted months in advance that I take her on an extravagant trip and be designated driver on her B-Day so she could do shots of Tequila with all her guy friends from HS. Today she is living with one of them along with my precious 5 year old daughter.<P>She insists that I didn't approve of her friends and that is why she ran to one of them. This is FALSE!! I guess I should've made it an issue; probably wouldn't have mattered though.<P>Jay

My W told me she was hoping that I'd be served papers on my 40th B-Day. She missed by 3 days (late). On the other hand, for her 40th B-Day 2 years earlier, she insisted months in advance that I take her on an extravagant trip and be designated driver on her B-Day so she could do shots of Tequila with all her guy friends from HS. Today she is living with one of them along with my precious 5 year old daughter.<P>She insists that I didn't approve of her friends and that is why she ran to one of them. This is FALSE!! I guess I should've made it an issue; probably wouldn't have mattered though.<P>Jay

My W told me she was hoping that I'd be served papers on my 40th B-Day. She missed by 3 days (late). On the other hand, for her 40th B-Day 2 years earlier, she insisted months in advance that I take her on an extravagant trip and be designated driver on her B-Day so she could do shots of Tequila with all her guy friends from HS. Today she is living with one of them along with my precious 5 year old daughter.<P>She insists that I didn't approve of her friends and that is why she ran to one of them. This is FALSE!! I guess I should've made it an issue; probably wouldn't have mattered though.<P>Jay

Not really. Our last counseling session, where the c told H not to come back until he decides to break all contact with OW, was the 11th anniversary of our first date. kinda weird.<P>But my birthday is coming up, so I'm nervous about what may happen.

WW's A started days before or after my then 3yoS's birthday party first week in Feb 1999.<P>Got notice that my Grandad died of a stroke 2 weeks later.. in NM and fly out for the the funeral. W spent the first night with the OM the night I buried my grandad. This was the first night that we were ever apart from each other since our marriage in 1992.<P>4 days later.. our 8 year anniversary and she did not want to meet me for lunch.<P>My mom's birthday, April 1st, 1999, she moved out, into a girlfriends house with the OM.<P>Mother Day, 1999, the OM wouldn't let her spend it with her children.<P>July 4th, 1999 she moves to her sisters in Dallas and OM moves in. I left my boys with her and checked into hospitalization.<P>Labor Day 1999, W moves back home.. OM moves less than one mile down the street from our house.<P>A continues and W moved in and out several times. W came home finally and we learned days around then that she was P.<P>New Years Eve 1999, W was atOM's.. he wouldn't let her leave his house, through her keys into a field.. she walked home and spent the final seconds of 1999 with me..<P>well these aren't very funny.. okay I'm stopping now..<P>------------------<BR>Semper,<P>Husband2You<BR>*****<BR>Don't make me promises <BR>Baby you never did know how to keep them well <BR>I've had the rest of you <BR>Now I want the best of you <BR>It's time for show and tell<P>'All or Nothing' O-Town

There's some old superstitious mexican tale that says something about starting three months leading up to your birthday that things start going down, and the closer one gets to their birthday the worse their decision making gets but starting the day after your birthday it starts getting better again.<BR>I don't really believe in this but I take alot longer to make decisions the closer I get to my birthday just to avoid this happening!<BR>OK, so not that that had alot to do with your question, just made me htink of that old tale.

AWww... come on folks.. there's more of you out there that have had this happen to you.. I know that for a fact.<P>H2Y: I hope you didn't think I was trying to make this really lighthearted.. but I guess my wording implies that somewhat. <P>shedawg: I've never heard of that before, but it makes perfect sense to me! Part of the reason I thought of posting this is because it really seems that holidays, anniversaries, and birthdays somehow add that much more stress into our lives (even in good times), and it just seems like there is a connection happening (to me anyways..grin).<P>catamount82: I am so sorry that you are still in so much pain. Keep on posting on MB, and we can help ease you through it, k?<P>Karen<BR>

My B-Day April 7<BR>D-Day April 8 2001<P>W B-Day July 11<BR>W told me its over a week later

My B-Day April 7<BR>D-Day April 8 2001<P>W B-Day July 11<BR>W told me its over a week later

Holidays have been pretty bad since D-day 3/29/01<BR>Easter caught him sneaking phone call to OW at family gathering. Mother's Day I went to dinner alone with the kids we were fighting, Father's Day another major fight, Fourth of July we had plenty of fireworks here! My b-day is coming up and our anniversary is in just around the corner hopefully things will be better. <BR>cybil

D-day was this past Valentines day - need I say more? I had asked H outright in January if he was involved with someone and he assured me he wasnt. I guess getting NOTHING for valentines day while he bought our 2 girls big heart fulls of candy was a big clue! Maybe I should have heeded his warning though when I asked him on valentines day morning and he said, " I really dont think you want to have this conversation today."

Topie,<P>I got a good one. Our 3rd anniversary was June 6, we officially celebrated June 9. On June 11th (My birthday) I caught W in parking lot with other man. She only wanted to go out to dinner with me on my b-day then she wanted to go meet coworkers of which one was the OM. She used to invite me to these events and I know the guy and his wife socially.

D-day was 13 days before 11 yr wedding anniversary.<P><P>------------------<BR>...Keeping a stiff upper lip. Life begins on the other side of despair.<BR>-Scarlet Pumpernickle<BR>s_pumpernickle@yahoo.com

My D-Day was in September ,no special occasion. OW was drinking and spilled her guts to her H. He left that night. So my H told me.<P>July 4th, WH went "fishing w/ OW's brother" and camping... of course she was there.<P>August 12, my birthday WH confesses some more... and decides to move out to find himself (NO not w/ OW)

D-Day was 8 days after our 6th Wedding Anniversary...