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Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 78
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Okay, it is Saturday afternoon and all I want to do is call my H. I am in Plan B, so I know that I should not do that. But, I am thinking that I want to call to see how he is doing and to let him know that I am thinking about him. He knows that I cannot be with him as long as he still maintains contact with OW, and in his case, they are co-workers so he will need to find a new job. But, I want to call just to say hi. What do you guys think? My willpower is slowly diminishing.<p>AS

Joined: Nov 2001
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I'm really new here, but I spent this whole past week reading, and studying, and hopefully learning a lot from these boards.<p>If you are in plan B, no contact!! I know, you're probably lonely, or missing him or something. Believe me. I am the WS in my relationship. If I were separated, and wouldn't quit seeing the OM, I KNOW my H wouldn't contact me.<p>Thank God (YES for real!) for the miracles He brought to me! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] We are together and doing well in Plan A.<p>Don't call. REsist the urge.

Joined: Feb 2000
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Calling him will put you right back at square one and willgive him the opinion that your Plan B letter was not to be taken seriously. Find something to do right now that will keep you away from the phone. This feeling will pass-it is like a withdrawal and you must be strong and not give in to the temptation.

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AS,<p>Get yourself out of the house. Call a girlfriend, go to a movie, the zoo, the museum, a park....ANYTHING. Just go and do something for yourself. Maybe see if you can get a massage for yourself or a bubble bath.<p>Do something nice for YOU and it'll ease your anxiety and need to call H.<p>We're here for you.
kev

Joined: Nov 2001
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Thanks- you guys are great. I think the feeling is beginning to subside. I still want to call him, but I think I have gotten some control over my emotions. I did call his brother's girlfriend. I should probably cut all ties with his family, but I just can't. I am trying to find out any/all information on H (brother's girlfriend had none to offer). I am actually hurt that his mother has not returned a phone call from this past Monday. Yet, my friends all tell me that there is nothing she can offer me at this time. She has already spoken to me on a few occasions, she is sick & embarrassed by her son's actions, and she knows I have a large support network. However, I cannot help but feeling betrayed by her- can't she find the time to call me and see how I am holding up. It makes me mad because she is an avoider. They all are avoiders. I hope my H is not avoiding the situation, but I am sure he is. <p>Sorry for rambling. Thanks again for being there when I needed a backbone.<p>AS

Joined: May 2001
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Ramble on, that's what we are here for.<p>Remember that in are in this for the long haul. Calling now will only serve to set things back. If you call, there will be less chance of Plan B working. So talk to us. <p>Z


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