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Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 28
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OP
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Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 28 |
Haven't posted here for a while so most of you are probably unfamiliar with my story.<p>Anyways, after 8.5 months of a Plan A (apparently unseccesful) I let my WS fly. Too much back-and-forth. Too many lies. Too many false hopes. Too much commitment breaking. I've heard "divorce cannot be an option" too many times with the knowledge that she constantly thinks about "him". Would leave me at the drop of a hat if he called her. January 1st I told her that I wanted her to go. She seemed happy to leave. Am I a failure? Have I betrayed my vows? Is there something wrong with me? My plan A was almost flawless. The only problem was when she'd try to contact him I'd find out and sometimes would want to discuss it.<p>I'm generally been ok with everything. I feel unburdened and for the most part free. But my 4 yo daughter said something to me last night that cut to the bone. "We aren't a family because mommy isn't here". I handled it well and explained that we were but could tell she didn't agree. She told me I should let mommy come back and that mommy missed me. I couldn't tell her that I didn't want mommy to leave in the 1st place and that I know she doesn't miss me. I feel like I jumped the gun now. This is my fault. I didn't stick it out. My Plan A could have been better.<p>Would I take her back if circumstances allowed? No! Yes! No! Yes! No! I don't know! I don't want to! I have to! I want to! I can't! Uggghhhh...
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Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 877
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Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 877 |
Mr.<p>We all have our limits and it sounds like you reached yours.<p>It's been 11 mos since d-day for me and we have gone thru two separations including the current one, which began on 12/31.<p>All I can say is that you need to do some stuff for you and your D and try no to worry about where your W is in all of this...<p>Sorry you find yourself in the uncomfortable position of trying to explain it to a 4 year old... <p>Hang in there...<p>E
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Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 28
Member
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OP
Member
Joined: Oct 2001
Posts: 28 |
Thanks E. This is my 3rd physical "separation" in the past year and a half. Here in VA, there is a 1 year no-cohab law. Each time we get back together we basically start the clock all over again.
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