I found out that i am a big part of the Problem

Hello Everyone Thanks for all your help & support I truly appreciate them. I went to counseling yesterday with the wife had told him thing are going better. We only had one problem that week & a great weekend. My wife brought up the fact that when she tells me some things that I will either not react or over react to them. He informed me that I need to learn to control & self-sooth myself so that my wife can feel more comfortable about telling me things that she needs to talk about. I told the counselor that I agreed so guess what he wants me to do. At first I was very excited doing an exercise with my W I felt that it would only bring us closer. But wait tell you here what I have to do. This is scary & a test. My W gets 25 minutes to talk about her feelings, Thoughts & any thing she wants to. I have to sit there & take notes and not comment, Interrupt or get emotional over anything she says. At the end of her time I am supposed to summarize what I think she is trying to tell me. She can correct me. After five minuets I am not allowed to talk about any of this. Until three days later we will reverse it. The next day we go to counseling. He told my W to make notes if I interrupt, Respond or break the rule of no talking about this for three days, To let him know. I am praying that I can do this. I am very Excited to here her thoughts & feelings I hope I can handle what I have been praying for.Thanks to all for you help The road is long but the patient shall reap great rewards. Their love for them self & their Spouse Through the love of God I have made another Day LotsofHope------------------

Hi there. I think that sounds like a very interesting assignment. Not a very easy thing to do. But I have faith in you, you want your marriage to work and you will do fine.

AND THIS IS WHY I DON'T WANT TO GO TO A COUNSELOR ....But best of luck to you!

Hi LotsofHope -I like this.....it's a good exercise in communication.Don't get nervous about it like it's a test!! You had me chuckling!!!It's just so you and your wife can retrain your talking and listening skills....Makes you focus on her words instead of on your replies..You can do this...you're ready for it because you are opening up and becoming aware.....Piece of cake!!!! Wil be for you, too Maya!!! LOL!!!HUGS to you both,Sheba Gosh, I wish I was you guys!!! Could you see me calling H and saying "c'mon over Honey so I can take notes....only problem would be - he doesn't talk!!! LOL!!!!