I have been posting here for 4 months. here is s breif synopsis of my story:
ww and I married for 7 years (me 35, ww 29)ww caught cheating in June. Affiar started in May.WW never broke contact with om and made recocillation impossible. Plan A until I could take no more and I asked her to leave (Plan B). WW asks for legal seperation, then Divorce to be with om. WW professes love for om. I come to terms that the marriage is over and not worth saving especially with no kids involved. (Still married and in the process of selling house while ww is staying with om).

Now for the update. ww came by to clean the house and help get it ready for appraisal. I found ww phone in her car while driving to the store. I never saw any pictures of om before so I looked on her camera phone. I thought I would be angry and hurt, but for some reason a calm came over me. He wasn't the stud I envisioned sweeping my ww off her feet. In fact he was quite unattractive and dorky looking.I went back home and couldn't stop smiling. I haven't figured out why yet but I felt releived and at peace for some reason.It was like it all fell into place for me. Anybody else had similiar experiences.

FWH's FOW is dumpy and horse-faced, at least without makeup. Not ugly, but not as pretty as me (with all due humility). And she is more than 2 years older. I am probably shallow to let any of that make me feel better. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" /> Since of course the right answer is that it doesn't matter whether I am prettier or not (I am), or who has the better figure (I do, despite 3 1/2 kids), or who is the most talented (that would be me, hands down). I am so many things she is not: honest, loyal, loving, committed, a mother, honorable, pure, MARRIED, the list goes on. (Did I mention I am not a wh***?)

I am glad you found one more way you are better than the OM, but the truth is he had nothing on you anyway.

Wow, I just got censored for the first time. I guess it's a good thing I wasn't discussing the wh*** of Revelation 17. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />

Knowing is empowering isn't it? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Yea, OPs aren't all they are cracked up t/b. Most BS' are disappointed their WS' fell for such loser looking aliens. But then again, they are in the 'fog'. LOL!!! Their vision along with their brain gets scrambled and out of focus. It becomes evident in their choices.

That why the BS' really need not worry about the OP being 'better than the BS'. Never is the case.

It is worse than the blind leading the blind. re: At least the blind have better hearing. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

L.

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Nice of you to let it show! I'd admit to being your mother, but I'm too <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />.

t&l

P.S. Your dad could never understand, either, why Prince Charles would rather have had Camilla instead of Diana. I never had any doubt in my mind which of them he'd have chosen, had he had the choice!

When I saw the OW for the 1st time, I told the WS how disappointed I was. I said something to the effect:

Orchid: I am soo disappointed.

WS: In what?

Orchid: If you were going to dump me, at least your'd have the decency to replace me with a better model. Where did you get this reject anyway? Adultfriendfinders.com? (Hm.... I knew they met online. - <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> ).

WS: (looking dejected).

Orchid: I mean really WS, next time take a step up, not down. She is even older than me and from the other pix (she sent him a very sexually explicit pix of her body parts, where the sun don't shine - YUCK)..... well Ws, to put it bluntly, she's got gray hairs where it ain't safe to dye it, if you know what I mean. (at this point I was crackin' up).

WS: She isn't as pretty as you. Nor as nice.

Orchid: Then I gotta ask the dumb question.... WHY?!?!?!

WS: I don't know. When I am with her, I want t/b home and when I am home I want t/b with her.

Orchid: Oh.... well from what I have learned, it seems you don't know where you belong. Well as long as you are with her for any length of time, you know we don't want you.... so go be with that crazy lady with 'gray hair'.... LOL!!!

You know it was a good thing I could laugh about it. By that time, I had heard enough babble to know better than to let it hurt me as it had in the past. Somehow that humor helped me keep my sanity. Causing the downfall of the A without a lot of hard work from me.

L.

When my WH (now XH) first informed me that OW is 10 years older then him, I felt some relief (all his online EA's were with young "20" something women!).

When I finally saw OW up close and in my drive way, *chuckle, chuckle, snort, snort* she looked a lot OLDER then what her actual age is. She also had dyed her hair. she was a brunette but is now a blond (of sorts), her hair looks tinted a light orange. Makes her look like a real scuz. I feel soooooo much better knowing how un-attractive she is.

Take care,

~Jamie~

i never saw my hubby's ow for a long time...(years)...the description i got from some of his buddies was....she is rough looking....lol....she looks like she was rode hard and put away wet..alot!....and many other such comments like this....made me laugh.

It took me almost 6 months to get my XW to tell me who it was and this was while we were attempting to reconcile AND recover. It took me 4 months after that to find a photograph. Her OM is the owner of a large company out of state so I signed up for a search for any news on teh company and wham...it's their 25th year and all sorts of press is out there. It is from this news that I learn of more lies she told me and there's photos too!!
OM was short, frumpy, and old! 14 years older! It was pathetic. Even after we were divorced and dating others her choice was to allow an older EA from work to get to the PA level. Two men who in her words "are not even remotely attractive". I was confused...not even knowing I was dating women completely opposite of her (my own Father told me I was doing that when he had met them)...XW (now my fiance)is quite tall and thin. I was dating very short and petite (5 foot tall - 100 pounds!)women. Age became a factor...I could not take myself seriously w/ younger women...in her words " I felt like you were moving up and I never did, I never thought you would ever find me attractive again"...she is beautiful...a Nicole Kidman look alike...

so bottom line is these OP are not always the best looking folks but they somehow make the WS feel good about themselves....

one of the ow my h was "hanging with" shall we say is a pure and true blue psycho. Everyone in town even says it. And I have gotten to experience her psychoness first hand. She is also like 40 or something (we are in are very early 30's and when h was hanging with her he was in his late 20's) she is very very skinny and not very pretty at all and has 5 kids. But, at that time h was in the bars alot and she is an easy sleazy barfly... so...

the current ow, well, in my opinion I think she is very plain and she enjoys doing guy things (probably because she likes all the male attention she can get.) she works a job as a security officer, she is on the fire dept, all male dominated fields. she wanted to be a cop but didn't pass the test and our local depts won't have her anyway since she cheated on her h with mine and her h is a cop. (duh!) But, a lot of guys in town do think she is hot. She dresses like trash with her t*ts hanging out, she has a pierced naval and tongue, and a tattoo on her lower back. Which a lot of guys like. She is about 4 or 5 years younger than h and about 7 years younger than me. But, a lot of guys in town also think she is a ho. Including most of the fire dept. They call her the "wheel" because they wonder who she will roll around with next. She hangs at the fire hall all day and dresses like trash and just eats up all the sexual comments made at her. She is slim, I'm not, never have been. I am more athletic voluptuos type.

Needless to say, she is direct opposite of me. I don't hang in bars or like it when men treat me like meat. She loves it. can see that h is going through a mini premidlifecrises of sorts. Bought a sportier car to be cool, listens to music that is very degrading but I am sure she loves like eminem and stuff, and I am sure he thinks her piercings and such are exciting and hot and her dressing like a tramp. she once told her stbxh that I was jealous of her. I said no way. I have respect for myself. I wouldn't want men treating me the way they treat her. I take pride in how I dress and present myself. I don't want the whole town calling me a ho! so jealous of what?

she has no morals, is very selfish, and acts and dresses like a slut. oh, and did I mention she is also a bit on the psycho side? believe me, I know. But h chooses not to see it in her just as he chose not to in the other. h has a LOT of waking up to do. mlhb

OW was ( still is maybe? ... don't know ! )

very very pretty

she never finished highschool

she was on her 9th affair

OW's most attractive feature? She knows how to make a man feel needed, and she always needed more than a man could give.

she was (is ?) a very attractive very sad woman who never can seem to find peace and happiness ... I believe (and H does too) she was sexually abused by family members as a girl.

My most attractive feature ???

I love life !!!!

OOh Thank You! I needed that LAUGH!!! It literally erupted and kept going..

A good, real belly laugh is so medicinal!!

I don't understand this particular trait that most A's seem to share...

My WW's Married OM is a somewhat overweight Philipino/Spanish mix. Friends that have seen pics of him have literally laughed out loud...

I want to feel better about this fact, but then I start to question my WW's judgement...and realize at one point in her life, she chose me. I sometimes think it would have been better had he been a GQ, hyper-intelligent, wealthy neurosurgeon that she just was powerless to resist...at least I would understand things a bit more.

Silly, isn't it?


TM

OM #1 was no more attractive than me

don't know about OM#2

OM#3...she can't even remember his name! How pathetic and shallow is that? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Her attempted A with an officer...he was just a regular "guy"! I found that out from a buddy of mine who knows him. Whe I told STBXW about me knowing what her "target" looked like and how he was nothing special, she seemed a little miffed at me. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

FOW is 37, FWH is 42. She was former weight lifter so is fairly sculpted. Large on top anyway, pretty face, beautiful white teeth, lasered hair off body, no tan lines, is a dentist in the military, is bisexual and loves fishing and loves SF.

I understand why, but it really is tough with the comparison problem. The only thing FWH will say bad about her is that she is a manipulator. I'll have to take that and run with it.

Minor OT for MicheleG...hope all is going well for you and FWH! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

WHnowBS,
Things are going pretty well, but OW is still trying to contact. Thanks for the thoughts, now back to our sponsors.

Glad to hear that FWH realized the error of his ways and is working with you.

What a psycho broad! Perhaps "diming" her out to her CO might get her out of your hair...if that hasn't already been done?

I know what you all mean about the OP not being all that great. OW is 9 years older than H but acts like she's 21. She has acne scars and is a notorious shopoholic (and H says I'm materialistic!). She smokes, is divorced, and has had a couple miscarriages from previous BFs. She doesn't know how to cook. She was living with her XBF rent-free for over a year while she looked for a job in her field (wouldn't stoop to retail or anything else to pay the bills) and goes to her XH for money. Apparently she's asked H for money, too, b/c I know he paid her cell phone bill at least once. She's been in trouble with the law before for bad checks. I will say that she is fun to hang out with. That's why I was friends with her.

Whereas I don't smoke or dye my hair. I play guitar and I'm in a bellydance troupe. I keep a clean, nicely decorated home, and I'm a good cook. I paid my own way through college and now work full-time at an important, respectable (albeit low-paying) job while enjoying being a mom to precious DD. She's 8 months old, and I still nurse her. (Not to mention that I weigh less now than I did before H and I got married.) What is wrong with him?

my wh women is 50 and ugly in the face -slimmer -been around the block- she screwed his boss and the cousin-he's lost weight i guess for herto do the do.
from word around her seperated husband is on drugs and hard to talk to so i guess she felt mine was easier.
My wh is there with his 3 broken down cars,bills, she has no car, and he has to ride the bus.
HMMMMMM.......

What is the old saying, beauty is skin deep, but ugly is to the bone? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Alright, since we've kinda made this thread into a "list what's wrong with your WS's OP" thread...

I was astounded at my wife's OM. She had ONE pic of this guy...and he was about butt-ugly. Bald, overweight...and if that wasn't enough, he smokes (she's VERY allergic to cigarette smoke), drinks every night, lives in a one-room apartment, had NO dishes or pots & pans (he bought some when he thought she was going to come live with him, since she told him she'd cook for him).

How she expected to live with him is beyond me. She wouldn't have even been able to ride to his house from the airport in his car...if she gets into a car that someone smokes in it triggers her asthma. Same thing about his apartment...even his clothes.

It's just downright amazing how reality goes right out the window when an affair starts.

My OM was not the greatest looking yellowed teeth, alot of them flase, toned body, but very skinny and shorter than me, looked older than his age, smoked, had many affairs before me, but during the fantasy of the affair - it didn't matter - all that mattered was how I was feeling...

Sadly H's OW was gorgeous - a single divorced mom, 40 (older than him) who mountain biked competetivly - she had a kick [censored] body, gorgeous face, and her act together (ran her own business) - to be honest, if she had known H was lying to her about me (she had no clue we weren't seperated, and when she came close to figuring it out - he left me) I don't think she would have dated him...I can't hate my OW cause I think she did have alot of class, sadly being that she was in another city - H was able to do alot of lying and manipulating...

What is with all of the wanderers?! Me included! My om was 11 years younger, acted age 7, had had SEVERAL other 1x sexual encounters w/ women (as many as 2-3 a year since marriage), discolored teeth, was 6" 2' and weighed 212, but wanted to weigh 240 (and have a pro-wrestler's phsique... yeah, that's a good healthy idea!), had the social skills of a semi-trained dog, and WASN'T GOOD (if you know what I mean...). He even said, "all your freinds would ask what you are doing w/ me... and I said, "oh no they would like you (yeah, I was lying!). FOG and addiction are CRAZY!!!!!!! (Yeah, but I'll confess to having been no saint, I acted needy, over-sexed, manipulative to get attention, etc.).

I guess the bottom line is that these om or ow are/were filling needs that we were not..... Now that we know, it would be nice if our wayward spouses would give US a chance to fill those needs.... I know my marriage could be 360 degrees different and better than it EVER was if h would come home and give me a chance... but he is still in fog and in A and not living here right now so..... I wait and see.... that's the only way I can explain him being with such a manipulative psycho half mental cheating lying woman... mlhb

It's because the really good people out there - who have beautiful souls which make them beautiful - wouldn't even think about getting involved with a married man or woman...but the ones who will, the ones who are interested in themselves (like I was) are all that's left...and many of us are tarnished.

I am a beautiful woman...a little overweight (20lbs) but tall and carry it well. I am by no means an ugly woman - but I am sure I wasn't very pretty while I was an OW...my soul was pretty ugly then.

H's OW though is beautiful and sounds like a terrific person. She never knew he was married - was always under the assumption that he had been seperated for months and the divorce was in prececedings...from the conversations I read of theirs, I know if she had truly known - she would have dropped him. Its sucks cause I would love to hate her - but she didn't know.

Oh my, I think I was in shock the very first time I saw the xow's picture.
Bugged out eyes, horse teeth, bad bad hair, adult acne, uglyyyyyy
I pulled it up and asked my FWH is that was indeed the xow. He looked so sick just by looking at her, he was so ashamed he just had hoped I never would get to see her.

He had to go throw up so I trashed the photo. When he came back he said he had forgotten how she looked and now that he saw the photo again he was just as shocked as me. What in the world was he thinking? he said.

Now I have a laugh thinking about it. Everybody at his old job, relatives, and friends say that they are so glad he ditched the xow (was xgf before me) and got someone way better looking. I guess that since people keep begging us to have babies (even strangers), we do make a cute couple.

I didn't need a picture of OW because I knew her. I guess I let her looks decieve me cause she doesn't look like a threat. She enjoys wearing flannel shirts,shorts and work boots at the same time. She doesn't dye her graying hair, she has no chin her mouth goes almost straight to her throat, she almost has an unibrow. She also enjoys wearing NASCAR clothing. The most feminine thing about her is that she wears rings on every single one of fingernail nubbed fingers. Her most attractive quality is that she like to have a good time and can drink beer til the cows come home.

I never saw my FWW OM... and really don't want to. But, she has described him as sounding not very attractive (bad acne problem as kid) and chunky.

I call him "The Toad" if we ever speak about him.
<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

I call the OW She Devil!!!

Travellinman, you only ned to understand that you are better off without someone that has obviously traded in good judgment for bad judgment. I am on my way to divorce and I don't feel bad about it anymore. It shouldn't be to hard to replace someone like my ww. Individuals like that are a dime a dozen.Don't get me wrong we had some great times together, but this is her choice and my choice is to live a good life with or without her.
Do the same my friend, it's the best revenge.

Wow...that is some picture. A bisexual dentist w/bleached teeth and too many darn muscles with a flyrod hanging on her wall. bleech!

My xh's ow? Plural ow...
1)monkeyho. I called her that. Gave her that name b/c of her upturned nose. Looks rather monkey-ish..ape ish actually. Bleached out blonde hair (she swears it is real...heck, I am a real blonde and I know fake when i see it). Skinny and a complete nut job. Compeletely codependent on everybody and deep down hates herself. She is psycho. Drug rep and thinks she knows as much as say...I do...about health care. Can we say get an education monkeyho? She tried to recently give my xcb *(xcollege boyfriend whom I still talk with back home) a lapdance at a party. He said "hey...if I were you, I'd step back. Gosh. Peachy is gonna think this is hilarious. You do know her don't you?"
2)Family Values: She is an x model and sometimes cuts hair. She has long straggly black hair with her own ends needing say a foot long trim. She is also stick skinny with a fake constant tan and tons of freckles from too much tanning. She is 10 years younger than me and looks older than me. Can we say she looks well...worn...
Heck, monkey looks like an x stripper worn hard also. Also no education past high school. At least monkey went to college. Tall. Also tall like monkey. Greatest claim to fame was being an atlanta maxxim girl.

For kicks, a guy buddy of mine back home showed me the same college yearbook. MOnkey and I went to same college...I was in a sorority, featured twirler, and frat little sister. MOnkey looked like she had stuck her hair into a electric socket. Plus SHE HAS A DIFFERENT NOSE NOW!!!!

Me: blonde/blue eyes. Five four. Size six. Not fat, just right. Curves in places where they should be. Goofy. Giggly. sometimes very serious when working. Good mom and former very faithful wife. Makes darn good banana pudding using chessmen cookies. Educated. Decent job. Somewhat respected in profession. was in top 10 of my former state's miss america pageant during college.

My best friends compare FV to me as this: It's like angeline jolie vs. reece witherspoon. One's vanilla, the other is chocolate.

Seems my xh likes chocolate and vanilla...and sprinkles too...latest is 21 year old college student. scarily reminds me of me 12 years ago.

My 4-year BF from HS had an A and left me for a, err...'plain' girl.

I'm pretty sure I felt worse to know that someone so plain could replace me. It's obvious why people fall for beauty, but to loose out to HER, that seemed more of a poke at me.

Well my former OM was very attractive...movie star looks...very nice build...great smile...I wouldn't want my h to see him...my h is attractive mind you and works out but...I still wouldn't want my h to see him. I prefer my h to think he is slimy. Unfortunately om did something that h found out about (in my best interest) and h for a moment thought om was kind of classy.

I really try to think of him in a disgusting manner but that is tough at times...I remind myself that looks can be deceptive. It is what we represented that I find disgusting. Funny how I feel much more beautiful now that-that part of my life is over. Thank you God.

Brandi

My WW's OM is nothing compared to me. Not to sound full of myself or nothing. He is short, overweight, a real dorky face with a dumb looking grin all the time. The real funny thing is, he is now tring to look like me. By shaving the same and tring to wear his hair the same. Probably at WW's request.. Although he is two years younger, he is balding and my hair cut does not work to well for him. lol
In fact WW has admitted to me several times that he is just not much to look at. She claims that he just does not compared to me at all. He is so ugly compared to me that WW is now saying she is ugly and how did i settle for someone like her.
OM is 5'10ish 230 or more. No muscle only lard, balding, yellow teeth, whimpy blue eyes. This guy screams mommas boy. Of which he is...
I'm 6'5" was 215 now 190. Athletic my entire life. let's just say god blessed me pretty well physically.
I have to say that I kind felt bad at first knowing the OM that stole my wife was a loser in every since of the word. Now it's funny knowing the guy is a milk dud and can't hold down a job and his best friend is his parents.

Hey, I know what we should do!!

Let's start a new photo thread with pics of our spouse's OP's in it!! LOL...kinda like a "most not-wanted" board in the Post Office!

Who's in? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

Owl,
I love the idea.LOL

I hesitate to admit . . . I'm ENJOYING this!

WH's First OW - 50, married, skinny, mousy, big nose, moderately intelligent.

WH's Second OW - 27, single, chunky, dumb as a stump.

Go figure?

Well, CC sent me here to check out this thread. She said it was so hilarious that she is STILL laughing.

Unfortunately, my WH's OW is 20 years younger than we are and very pretty. She is very tiny - about 5 feet tall and 100 pounds. My WH is 6'2" and 260 the last I knew.

The only thing that makes me smile is that he had a horrible habit of almost crushing me during SF. I have thoughts of him smothering her one of these days.

My H's MOW is pretty and has a toned body that she works hard at. She spends a lot of money on trendy clothes and she has a pretty bubbly personality. It is all superficial though. My H says that up close her face is pretty wrinkly from years of tanning, she is very high maintenance once you get to know her, and while she may have a nice body she has had multiple affairs during her two marriages so she isn't a very nice person - this all came from him. He also said that she isn't a very good mother since she always puts her needs above her kids - they cannot even go out for sports because it would interfere with her social life. Evil wrapped in an attractive package I guess. It is too bad that society values the superficial aspects of people like that more than people who take care of their families and give to others and who have morals............

Post deleted by Shattered05

TOO funny Shattered! And what's your WH thinking? He's pickin' possum pants over a runway model with a great sense of humor?

Sadly, I can't claim my xwh's o/w was ugly.
She is in fact quiet pretty with huge big brown expressive eyes, her personality is bubbly, upbeat, twenty one years younger the xwh and is loud and very opinionated. She has beautiful long brown locks. The only comfort I have is the fact that she is known by her work as the "Player", and loves to make new best friends with men. My theory is because her father was an awful child molestor, and left a big hole in her life, she now has a problem with needing all eligible and non elgible men to satisfy her emotional needs. I feel pity for her husband. I also pity myself because my xwh still to this day doesn't think badly of what she did.

Along with the fact that he is still with you, and seems to be trying - right? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />