What is the most ridiculous thing your WS said?

One of my favorites is: "You should have KNOWN I was lying!"It's not the lying that's the problem--it's that I BELIEVED the lies that's the problem. But then I'm SUPPOSED to believe what he says now. [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img]

Well...2 weeks after my H moved out, I discovered I was pregnant.He was IN the bathroom with me when I took the urine test. Several weeks later, he told me that I was faking my pregnancy. When I asked him HOW that was possible when he was THERE when I took the test...he told me that I must have stolen/borrowed urine from my pregnant SIL and used sleight of hand to pour it on the tester while he was watching me.Hmmph. I took him to the OBs office to hear the baby's heartbeat.

Amazing how the WS logic works, isn't it? " You were at home asleep anyway..."" You should have known I was depressed..."" You're a fair-weather wife... " (before d-day)" You're damaged goods, Snow... " (???) I add that last one to the ridiculous list rather than 'sad' or 'hurtful' because it's just too twisted to be understood. Or taken seriously. Snow[ February 28, 2002: Message edited by: Snowwhite ]

I know I've quoted this one before, but it floors me every time I think of it..."If I leave and hate it, can I come back in 6 months?"

WS response when questioned as to why he sent a s3xual e-mail to the OW when he is suppose to be in recovery:WS: Oh, I didn't mean it. I said it to her just to patronize her. She likes to hear that kind of stuff. BS: Patronize the OW? WS: Yes, but I don't patronize U. Because I care for you. I don't tell you I love U because I don't want to patronize you. I am honest with U. Now, howz that for babble?!?!? [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img] L.[ March 01, 2002: Message edited by: Orchid ][ March 01, 2002: Message edited by: Orchid ]

My favorite from my ex wife, that I've posted many times before,"There was nothing in our wedding vows that said I had to stay with your forever"hello, hello, hello......is there anybody in there?

Me: "What was it that made you fall in love with OM?"WS: "Mostly it was his sense of ethics and moral integrity."

Here are a few good ones from my H.I want to go out on dates with you.
(when he was practically living w/OW)If we get a divorce...it doesn't mean we can't get remarried.Once after he had left he called our house at about 11 p.m......he let it ring 1 1/2 times. I tried to call him back to see what he wanted in case there was an emergency and realized he'd called me when he was trying to call the OW since the phone was busy for the next 2 hours.
(his explanation....I was calling to check on the girls........he'd just talked to them 2 hours earlier)He once said that he knew he would regret everything that he was doing and that he would wake up one day and it would all hit him in the face....but he was having too much fun to stop doing it.
(fun at his familes expense)Now that I think back on this I think the most rediculous thing my H ever said during this whole thing was..............You're not worth staying for.
(he said this in front of our then 10 yr old daughter)I realize now what an impact that had on our daughter. She assumed that since he said that I wasn't worth staying for that she obviously wasn't either. How sad.
I also realize that he had it wrong at the time.....it wasn't me that wasn't worth staying for....it was that the person that he was at the time wasn't worth fighting for.

There were many....among them...For the first 2 months after D-Day I heard a lot:
"You're making way too much out of this - it was no big deal."In one conversation we went from "it was just about sex....it really had nothing to do with the sex....the sex itself really wasn't that great...it wasn't emotional, it was just sexual..." He had a hard time making up his mind!And my favorite about a year after D-Day:
"T (his best friend) had an affair, his wife got over it in 6 months and their marriage was back to normal -- I don't understand why you can't let this go."JJ

One of my favorites "Why can't OM and me still be friends, we were friends before we became lovers, and I still love him now, so why can't I still be his friend?"

Oh, I could go on for pages (as those of you who have read my replies already know), but I won't. Here's the all-time 'winner', said minutes after I found him on my cell phone talking to FOW, on d-day #2: "I have never loved you, and I am now completely cold to you!" Half an hour later, after H has agreed to end the A (again) and not resume it ever, he reaches for my hand and says "OneDay, I love you." I respond with "Excuse me? Could you please repeat what you just said?" He replies "I love you." When I ask about what he said a mere 30 minutes earlier, H says "I never said that. I have always loved you and I have never, for a minute, stopped loving you."I will add that it was not the only time during the whole post d-day nightmare that H has said he never loved me or that he was cold to me or that he did not care for me or about me. But, he apparently loves me with all his heart and always has and I am an angel sent to him by God, if you believe what he says today. [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img][ March 01, 2002: Message edited by: OneDay ]

ok, I can top all of these...it isn't mine (my friend's H said it to her) but here goes:"I was thinking about you...I wore a condom."Wasn't that considerate?

Hi there, The most ridiculous thing my WH told me during his full-blown fog was that" You are only with me for my money". (he's a doc) When I pointed out to him that we had been married since he started med school, and neither of us had a dime back then and for a long time after that, how did he figure that? He then said "Well, you knew I had prospects and knew I was ambitious and hardworking". This coming from a man who had already gone through rehab before and I still stayed with him! I replied that"I couldn't have known back then if you were going to be dead from drug abuse or be killed by some dealer! So even so I somehow knew you would someday make money?" (Wow, I should set up my fortune-tellers booth right now!)It just made me so mad, because I WASN"T the one who appeared in his life just when he was making the most in his whole life, that being his 24 yr. old honey! Just how did he account for that? Oh, yeah, well that was "true love". What a load of cr*p!At least he's out of the fog now and realizing that yep, here I am still, even after he is having trouble with his employer and possibly his license, too. He realizes know who truly loves him, for better or worse.

I'll add a few from our house--Right after discovery- BS: How could you do this to me??? WS: I felt that our marriage was over in my head. I know you'll never forgive me so I'll be leaving you to be with OW. To our pastor 3 days later: Pastor to WS: God wants us to work on our marriages. WS: I know what I SHOULD do but I just dont WANT to do it.During withdrawal phase from OW when he moved back home but wouldnt touch me- BS: why wont you hug or kiss me or show me any affection? WS: Because I'm waiting to see if my feelings for you come back to me.

OK, I'll jump in here:WS (after learning that I tape recorded her phone conversations with OM): "I knew you were taping me and I told him I was in love with him to hurt you."WS (when asked why she didn't look for the tape recorder): "I looked for it. I looked in the basement and in the spare bedroom. I couldn't find it." It was in the spare bedroom, hooked up to the only phone in the room. It couldn't have benn missed. WS (regarding the affect of D on our daughter):
"She'll be happy as long as we're both happy." Sure, tearing her family apart and taking her from the only home she has known won't affect her.WS (on why she should get custody: "..because I'm her mother...that's the way it works." WS (after having detailed billing removed from her cell phone bill): "I haven't talked to OM for months."
BS: "I wish you could reassure me of that. Why don't you get detailed copies of your cell phone bill for the last 3 months?"
WS: "I can call Verizon and heve them reinstate detailed billing."
BS: "That's not what I asked." It would have been a perfect chance for her to prove she wasn't lying and to shut me up.sad dad

Here's one. WS "We haven't been married for years"! Huh? We were only married five years! Had two kids, bought a house in the process. What does that mean? You are either married or you aren't. I guess my ex just had to tell himself he wasn't REALLY married! I'll never understand that one. [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img]

"It only happened three times."

<blockquote>quote:<hr>Originally posted by be_positive:
Me: "What was it that made you fall in love with OM?"WS: "Mostly it was his sense of ethics and moral integrity."<hr></blockquote>ROFLMAO!!!!!

Oh, I forgot one!After informing my WS that I was going for STD tests he said something to the affect of that I was paranoid, that I had nothing to worry about
(OW had been married to her H for a long time and he knew her), and it's not like we live in the city where STD's are common.This was really funny because he works part-time in the medical field and we've previous raised one teenager who got lectured by him about STD's and using protection (which of course he didn't).
And turns out he didn't know the OW so well...after investigating the OW I found out from very reliable sources that this was not her first or last affair. How can people be so dumb!! (BTW...thank God all tests came back negative!)JJ

Oh I forgot this one...Me: Why are you still here, WW?WW: <some babble then says> and I take my marriage vows seriously.
WTF?!?!?!!!?!

Here is a couple of priceless one...I just want a chance to see if it will work out between me and OW...can't you just give me that?AND....(this one is funny)TO OW: Sure I don't want anything to do with your kids, but I'm not dating your kids.
HE'S MARRIED!!!! HE SHOULDN'T BE DATING!!!! HELLO. i SWEAR THEIR FOG IS AS THICK AS PEANUT BUTTER SOMETIMES.

With phone bill in hand showing where he had called a W he had met on-line.
I called the phone company verified the name and number matched the info in ICQ file.
H: I don't know what that is. I didn't call anybody.

It was a phone bill error. Yeah right!!! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

hehehe... we had a thread like this a while back... These are sooooo funny!!! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] I'm sure there's many I could think of, but here's my favorite:My H said he was helping OW get involved with church... they were helping each other with their relationships with God... <blechhh> awwwwww.. bless their wittle hearts!!!ok, one more (recent):
We met 2 weeks ago to sign the D papers. He had a cheap silver ring on his left ring ringer. I asked him what it was. Him: "It sorta means I'm attached, but not really attached."
Me: "So... like... an engagement ring?"
Him: "No. It's nothing. Just something I bought myself."blechhhhhh

Oh I have 2 good ones.When I found the first card, a fathers day card. there was no address on the envelope but inside it had H's name as in "My dear Steve". He said he didn't know who it was from and had never seen it before
Me: it was handed to you there is no address on it.
H (after a few minutes): Oh I bet someone put it on my car and they had the wrong car
Me: someone else named Steve was parked in your company lot and drives the same kind of car eh?
H: Yeah maybe so
Me: So how did it get into OUR house?
H: I must have tossed it into the trunk of my car and then picked it up accidentally one day
Me: It says enjoy your vacation and we left for vacation the day before father's day
H: Wow that's a huge coincidence. Maybe someone else was going away then tooDUH!And the one from last night, one of my all time favorites.H was here unexpectedly and I received several hang up calls. H can't believe that these calls I've told him about are really happening.H: Wow someone really wants to get on your nerves.
Me: Yes and I'm sure we both know who it is
H: No why would she call you when it's me she wants to talk to?Double DUH!

Me: So what went wrong in our marriage?
Her (WS): You never bought Coca Cola. You only bought Pepsi.

Proof positive that they all are controlled by the same Mothership.My WS trying to explain why she moved out (because she denied having an affair): I had to leave. It was YOUR decision NOT to leave.WS after I confronted her with my observation of her and OM in the airport only several hours earlier - she had picked him up upon his return from a business trip instead of going to a counseling session:WS: It didn't happen.Me: Oh? You mean you didn't meet OM at BWI this morning, gate C-24, US Air flight <flight number> from Pittsburgh that arrived at 8:45 and you didn't walk with him to the luggage claim, stopping at the bottom of the escalator to hug and kiss?WS: (incredulous, staring me straight in the eye) It didn't happen!WAT[ March 01, 2002: Message edited by: worthatry ]

<blockquote>quote:<hr>Me: So what went wrong in our marriage?
Her (WS): You never bought Coca Cola. You only bought Pepsi. <hr></blockquote>No wayyyyyyy!!!! ROFL!!!!! [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img]

OK I'll bite....Agree with the mothership theory, this post is hilarious.ME: Have you two had sex?HIM: No way! We are doing this the 'right way'
In God's eye's!HAHAHAHAHAHA!ME: (After having sex with him) HEY! You just
cheated on her. And I bet she does the
same to you with her H.HIM: No possible way, we are committed to each
other, she wouldnt cheat on me with HIM.
I wish I had a Polaroid to snap the look in his eyes after I told he cheated on her with me. We never had sex again until recovery.Dara

My last attempt at talking about the state of our M took place 1/30/02. Here is an excerpt:Me: Have you ever given any thought as to what you could or should have done instead of having an A?WS: Yeah, I should have done what I've always done.Me: What's that?WS: I should have just said No.Me: (Remembering the narrative in his own handwriting still in my possession describing how the A began with him asking OW to meet him somewhere) What do you mean?WS: Well, I've always had women interested and I've always turned them down before.Me: What are you talking about?WS: When women would be attracted to me.Me: What exactly do you mean? What incidents are you referring to? (Having never been told of any throughout the M)WS: Well, the whole M, women come up to me and say, "I'm attracted to you. Will you come home with me?"Me: So, you're telling me that you have been propositioned like this repeatedly throughout our entire M and you just gave in this one time?WS: Yeah, well really my whole life it's been like that. I don't know what it is, it's just always been that way.Me: Have you ever given any thought to the situation you are in when this type of thing happens?WS: It just happens.Me: So, for instance, this has happened at church?WS: Mmmmmmmmmmmm.....I'm not sure. I can't remember if it's happened since we've been married or not (implying that it HAS happened, but he can't quite place it on the timeline).I learned four things from this conversation: 1. He still can't keep his story straight and maybe forgot that just one month previously he told me in writing that HE was the pursuer of the OW, and now I'm supposed to believe that she propositioned him and he just failed to say No. That is the extent of his insight.2. If I believe this new story, there have been numerous OW, maybe even women I know from church and elsewhere, and I have been cuckolded who knows how many times since for 10 YEARS he neglected to tell me how in constant demand he was. If this scenario is anywhere near true, then SOMETHING took place BEFORE the propositioning. Even in my best Babe days, I didn't have that sort of thing happen unless I was sending signals or at least flirting in some way or in a place or situation which would invite it. I actually have insight into how such things happen.3. My H thinks I'm an idiot and is STILL tremendously disrespectful of me and our M.4. There is no point in pursuing such ridiculous nonsensical nonproductive conversations. They are offensive and just raise more and more questions to be answered just as nonsensically.So that is why, with the cumulative effect of so many of these types of exchanges, I quit talking to him about our M.Is this the only way we can test whether reality has hit them yet or not?[ March 01, 2002: Message edited by: Conqueror ]

I probably shouldn't do this, but I did suggest the materials she found re some of my personal feelings for the ow, were actually the notes I was writing for a romance novel..... (although I do think that might be a good idea)..... and that the ow was collaborating.....look it you guys, we (ws) aren't really nuts, it just looks like it, as we work really hard at coming up with explanations for the unexplainable.... we know you won't believe this stuff, we are just trying to delay the inevitable, for the usual reasons.... but at least our creative sides get a good workout.

WS said to me many times - I don't love you, I love the OW.WS said to me - Why can't everyone let us be.WS said to me - It wasn't sex, it was bonding, getting close to her. (I guess the next man I find to be a friend, I will tell him the same things.)WS said to me - You are a fu*k*ng B*t*h (many times).WS said to me - when his cellular phone would ring (it would be on vibrate), one time it was on the couch and I felt the vibrate. He looked at it, and said "it was the wrong #" Or "it is the sprint people calling to talk about the bill". We weren't born yesterday.WS said to me - when I found money missing out of our account. You must of added it wrong, or made a mistake. WS said to me - the very graphic sexual letters he was writting to his munchkin - I found on stationery he was writting it on, that had this little girl surrounded by a heap of garden vegetables. He said "it is a romance novel I am thinking of writting". Now I know what the garden meant!Could tell you more, but this is so depressing! All these lies from the one you gave your life to.[ March 01, 2002: Message edited by: thinker ]

SNL,The why don't you fess up to being 'far-fetched'? It certainly would cut down on the stress time factor. When H babbles like that, now I tell him. I let him sit in his babble puddle for a while then go back and tell him his pants are wet. H is beginning to acknowledge it. The last time he admitted his line 'patronizing the OW' was far fetched. I totally agreed. See we the BS can be agreeable, it just has to make sense. Don't treat us like we are stupid. Why? Because when we get our strength back, watch out.....you pants might be wet! L.

Two of my favorites are"If you had an affair, I wouldn't need counselling." (he hated spending the $85 a week for marriage counseling)
Mind you this was 1 1/2 years AFTER the affair when we were discussing vacations - WS "you got to take a two week vaction and not work." (I had gone home to my parents when he asked for the divorce)ME "you were screwing my best friend, I am fairly postive you were having more fun." 
2 yrs post d-day and recovering nicely

OK, I will succumb to the peer pressure. My husband, between the first discovery and second, said many many things. They ranged from:Husband: "I never stopped loving you." "I love her more than I love you." "I want you both." "It was wonderful but it's over." Can you say LIAR? [img]images/icons/mad.gif" border="0[/img] And the coup de gras? "I had to think of you so I could do 'IT'." Barf, gag me with a spoon.Scarlet

"he looks just like you""he is just a friend!""it was only once"

I love it! Great thread.Some of my favs."She reminds me of how you used to be. You know, before I ruined you by being so mean.""I figured since I did it once I wrecked the marriage, so it really didn't matter how many hookers I called.""I kept doing her to make sure she wouldn't call you and tell you I was doing her."On why he never told the therapist he was having an affair...
"I thought if the marriage counselors and you knew I was having sex with her they wouldn't try and save our marriage."And just last night, even though the divorce was final 2/11...
"Do you think that if we ever got back together you would still hate me?"This isn't fog or peanut butter, this is a layer of shinola that stinks to high heaven!

This was unsolicited ... x-H just decided I needed to know that ...."There is an innocent & virtuous quality about OW, like a child" <GAG>OW Profile: 44 years old, 4 children - all diff fathers, phaux breasts installed, Kareoke Host/Career Welfare recipient, part time potty mouth harasser of MM's wives.[ March 01, 2002: Message edited by: Resilient ]

haha, snl admitted to saying something ridiculous while in the fog [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/tongue.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/grin.gif" border="0[/img] look it you guys, we (ws) aren't really nuts, it just looks like it, as we work really hard at coming up with explanations for the unexplainable.... we know you won't believe this stuffWe know you aren't nuts, that's why we have the "moose-brain worm" and "alien-abduction" theories. You work really hard to come up with that stuff??? We thought the Mothership did your thinking for you!! [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img] And so are you saying is it's easier to come up with a story than to admit you made a boo-boo and make amends?I not fussin', or debatin'... but I think that's further proof of the "ridiculous"-ness of WS babble.... avoiding personal responsibility... [img]images/icons/wink.gif" border="0[/img]

Rut Roh, I wasn't gonna say nothin, but "uh huh", what Faith said. Sowwy SnL.Jo

Chris, still laughing about the coke.And firefly reminded me that my h said once 'you're only with me for the sex (that might have been partially true) and the money.' Yeah, he was unemployed when I met him and had more than 15 jobs in the first 15 months--some lasting only a day, some he never got paid for. Oh, and I have always made more than double what he does.Yep, that's me. I'm a shameless gold digger.

But the Coke was only one thing, She did also say;
"You made oat bran muffins that one time." (About 12 years ago, I had high cholesterol and was doing the "6 Week Cholesterol Cure" Lotsa oat bran in the diet. Really works. 225 -> 175 in 2 months!)
"You only bought wheat bread, not white."
"You only bought 1% milk, not whole milk."My wife said she did not leave me/kids for this guy either. "He had nothing to do with it."This is the only input from her which I have had to try and understand the marriage failure.

chris, I suspect your wife has a serious communication problem, and what those things meant was she felt she was not a full partner (whether true or not) in the marriage, that essentially you (whether deliberately, or by her own avoidance behaviour) called the shots. This is a hard thing to understand, and I am only really finally beginning to(and some does apply in my marriage too), the "fix" is radical and difficult, and I don't think many get to do it (either opportunity, or apply it right). But what do I know, anyways just a thought, everything means something, and either your wife is nuts, or she is telling you something important (albeit in chineese).

I think that the stupidest thing he ever said to me was "It's too bad we don't live in France, cause then this would be quite acceptable and he could have both of us" I'm pretty sure it wouldn't matter where I lived, it wouldn't be acceptable to me! "It's too bad you found out, because in a few months it would have been over and you wouldn't have been hurt" His A lasted about 5 yrs!!I don't know if any one you have ever heard of West Edmonton Mall, it's here in Canada, and it has this fancy hotel with theme rooms. He took her there for a weekend in the Roman Room, heart shaped bed, jacuzzi, etc. $500 a night. When I brought it up in front of the T,(he didn't know I knew) he said the room didn't have a bed, it had racks!! He also told the T that it was more of a father/daughter relationship (he was 40, she was 21 when it started). I said "yeah, father's always f*&^ their daughters!" He also told me that the many times that he spent weekends with her in hotels, they never slept in the same bed. How does a genius become so stupid?? [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img]

Oh, i have to play:WS: "you rich people!" WS: "You are not real, only EMT's firefighters and policemen are real because they put their butts on the line every day." WS: "you are too independent!"WS: "Your success makes me feel bad!"WS: "If i told you that OM and I were going to go to. . . , you wouldn't have let me go!"STBXW: "I know that this is your vacation time with the kids, but to take them to your house and NOT go somewhere with them is cruel and immoral!"STBXW: "I live in the present. . . the future is irrelevant." (right, like not being responsible for the future results of your actions!)XFIL: "I don't want to learn how to do xyz, I want someone to blame if it goes wrong."BS: "What do you mean you haven't loved me for 10 years? I have cards from you saying that you did."
WS: "ohhh, I just wrote that stuff."BS: "are you trying to tell me that (me trying to repeat what i just heard her say) . . . . . ?"
STBXW: "don't tell me what to think!"WS: "I washed the floor yesterday, that means you should be unpacking those boxes right now without a break!" (i didn't know that's what washing floors meant!) well, some slightly off topic, but reality, not in this millenium. . .wiftty

After 2 years, I could probably write a book, but here's the 3 most ridiculous....."You really should change your toenail polish color. That looks like something my mom would wear.""Could you please change the hairspray you use, I really don't like the scent."After learning that he was still sleeping with OW, not using protection, even after it was confirmed that he gave me HPV...."I didn't figured it mattered if I used condoms or not. I already gave you one STD." [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img] [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img]

The STBX's A started when he was 43 and having lots of nagging sports injuries.Now 3 yrs later he is living with the OW, who is at least 12 yrs his jr.My OS (17.5) heard the OW's family ask STBX if he had his mid-life crises yetSTBX replied No, I don't think so.OS comes home & can't believe OW's family asked the question, isn't it obviovios & then can't believe his dad doesn't think he has had one.

After just staring at me for a few minutes... "You know, if I was a mad scientist and could mash you and the OW together I'd have the perfect woman." Uh.....right.

I could add a couple from the mouth of my doofus:"She's got two young children and no one to help her and her life is so hard and I feel sorry for her." (Didn't bother him that he was doing the same thing to me and to our two children who were 4 and 2 when he moved out.)"I have this chance at happiness. I don't know if it will work out. But I've got to take this chance." (That woman never even went out with him. He asked her and she turned him down.)And once, when I'd made him mad over something, I said "Excuse me for breathing." And, YUP - IN FRONT OF OUR CHILDREN, his reply was "I wish you wouldn't."

This one isn't quite in the same class as those who have gone before me, but it's so recent that I'm still kind of amazed:"I know you think our moral compasses point in different directions but they are closer than you think."She followed her moral compass into multiple adulterous affairs and several more EAs. If my moral compass were at all close to hers I wouldn't be able to sleep at night.

WH: 'Maybe we can live together again when my sex drive slows down, in 10 or 14 years.' (I'm not able to fulfill his SF due to being disabled)He also told me a list of all his female friends and why he couldn't marry each of them (ummm, you're already married to ME??). Of course OWs name was not on that list.I guess now that he's living with the OW he's getting all the sex he wants.... I don't know, I went to plan B as soon as he didn't want to give her up.Evensong

There are so many, but the following really sticks out in my mind. It was mere moments after I found his cell phone, and learned the numerous EA's were continuing 5 mths post D-day number 1.
He said:You know what?? You really have to stop putting me under a microscope.That one just kills me!!

WS "I think we really need to make a list of all our incompatibilities."Me: "Such as?"WS: "You like carrots and I don't."
(Seriously, this is exactly what he said!!!!)Me: "How about if we also make a list of all our compatibilities?"WS: "Do you think that's really important?"

Oh these are too funny! I have tears in my eyes from laughing so hard. Here's mine:BS- according to this cell bill you called my mother after my surgery and talked to her for 4 minutes. Five minutes later it shows you calling OW and talking for 30. What in god's name were the two of you discussing? I had just gone through major surgery.WS- She was concerned about your surgery and wanted to know how you were doing.YEAH RIGHT!My thought: they were hoping I'd die on that table and the two of them could continue their little liason without the added headache of a wife interefering. I did have the nerve to tell him this. Of course he denies my thought. Oh and another one:WS : I never meant for this to happen.
BS: Let's see you meet her one evening,at the end of a bar, ask her to spend the following day with you, lie and tell her you are separated from your wife, then sleep with her that same afternoon.
WS: Yes, but I never meant for it to happen.Right, hello turnip truck, could you please come back and pick me up seems I've fallen and can't get up.

Been reading and this is too cute! A lot of the same as above from my H... let's see..."MY leaving has nothing to do with the OW"
funny when he left he sd he thought he loved her, and just had to find out."I have never been happy for 10 years""I love you" sd this throughout the whole thing to me."She turned me on to the Heights, but I did not move her because of HER..."
the neighborhood he lives in..."It is a psychic connection"- he and the OW"She would NEVER do that...." regarding all the harassing hang ups I constantly got..."It's more than just sex"-- what is it then?"SHe and I are the same, we are alike in every way... we are like the same person... " FOG?????" I really know her" (they have known each other 5-6 months at work... and he has known me 18 years...????
DOn't know what else... it just makes me sick....but this is a funny link, thanks!TOday.... "I don't know why I called you, I just did" "Do you want to clean my toilets" "Can you wash my dishes?" Not long ago... "I can't come home, but you cam come and live here..." (about the house 2 blocks away from ow in bad neighborhood for schools and kids...Also..."I would never have sf with someone who has a disease, etc...."We found out she has bachettes (sp?) not a vd, but some kind of disease that produces blisters all over her body..??/ (My H is very particular about bodies and things like that... he would never like anything like that... but this is what he ended up with)Also told me she used to be really fat, and everyone called her Michelle the Whale growing up! HEHEHEHE
Hugs, RMM

I guess it's good to find to find something funny in the pain. And I find it comforting to know I'm not alone in hearing most of this babble. I guess I've heard most of the "standard" ones, but this one is super foggy. After telling me that he hasn't loved me for a while, probably for years [img]images/icons/mad.gif" border="0[/img] , he said: "You don't love me either, because I read that note in your locker that you wrote to T*** (my friend) saying you thought B*** B*** was cute." Bear in mind that I was 15 and H was 17 and we were in high school when I wrote this, and we are now 37 and 40. [img]images/icons/shocked.gif" border="0[/img] My H is the grand champion of grudge holders.

And the weird thing is now, that we are supposedly in recovery, he says he can't remember saying most of it and besides he didn't mean it anyway. [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img]

Hmmm.. For me it would be D-day night while he was packing to leave.. (I told him to leave)Me: I want my ATM card before you leave. (I have a seperate account that the $$$ from my lawsuit is in.)WS: But I'm broke and I'm on a quarter tank. Me: Guess your not going far huh? Then the MOST RIDICULOUS thing is: <drum roll>WS to ow in a Christmas card: Luvs you with all my heart and we'll be together soon. <BARF!!>Isn't it amazing how delusional our WS's can be?!?!?

The most ridiculous thing he said to me was this:"The affair was your fault." While he was shacking up with the married OW, I was thousands of miles away at home taking care of EVERYTHING and He was playing in Korea!!!The funniest, "I do want to be your friend." This was after telling me over IM about everything and that he wanted a divorce...just not the details, which I made him give me over the phone soonafter. Ha, with friends like him, there is no way I ever need any enemies!

<blockquote>quote:<hr>Originally posted by Chris (CA123):
"I like Coke but you buy Pepsi"
"You made oat bran muffins that one time."
"You only bought wheat bread, not white."
"You only bought 1% milk, not whole milk."This is the only input from her which I have had to try and understand the marriage failure.<hr></blockquote>Chris, I'm sorry for your pain, but these really are priceless! You had me laughing so hard, I'm crying.The only input I'm getting from DH is similar:
WS: "I can't talk to you about this. I just had to leave."
WS: "I just don't want to be married anymore."
BS: "You're living w/ow. Isn't that a PSEUDO-M?"
WS: " No, it's not the same thing. We're just dating."I think my turnip truck is rounding the corner! [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img]

"I did not give you that STD." (H is the only man I've ever been with.)"You know, Cafe Woman asked me about a year ago if you had any problems with our friendship." (he now denies telling me this.)More recently:"I have never lied to you." (Although he lied to me for over 13 years about the STD Tramp.)My response: "That's another one!"

Another thing WS told me - 'I've told the other woman things that I never told you'.These WS think they are the greatest, with their lies and their distancing.

Counselor asked my H what was so appealing to him about OW? He said,"Well, she kept her desk at work so organized and her condo so tidy."
lifeismessy ( mom to 3 great but messy kids, a huge new house, hamster and a bird)

Gosh there are so many, let's see: (During initial denial of the affair)"I'm only nice to her because I feel sorry for her. She's not particularly attractive, she has fat arms and is as dumb as a rock." (Immediately after I voiced suspicion of the affair the cell phone bill stopped coming to the house). "They just changed the rules at work that they won't reimburse us for work related cell phone calls if the bill doesn't have our work address on it." "I don't love you anymore, but I will always love you and you will always be my best friend." Huh what? "You can't say that I abandoned you when you were pregnant because you didn't find out for sure until the day after I left." "You have it easier than me because at least you have friends. I have to go to a job that I hate and go home to an empty apartment in a gross neighborhood all alone every night." In reality he was LIVING WITH the OW, but she did live in a gross neighborhood. "We can get a quick annulment, I'll keep the house and you can get an apartment. I'll pay your rent for afew months until you get on your feet." ROFL! The lawyer I talked to thought that was hilarious.

Here is my favorite, after she moved in with OM, she Said, " I am not going to do anything with Him ubtil after the D, It would be right if I did"

These are great! It is so stress relieving to have a nice laugh!The famous one: "I am not IN love with you. I just love you like a sister."After xh moved out and one month later was dating ow: "You need to move on with your life and find someone for you, we aren't really married anymore. At least I don't feel married."Xh replying to a statement I added to the D papers: "If the children stay the night, (OW) can't stay over? I don't plan on marrying ever again, if (OW) moves in, what I am supposed to do? Tell her to find a hotel?" Me: Uh, yep!Xh: "Once we get settled down and find new people to be with we can get together and have cook-outs and be like a family." Me: What?!?!?!? (By the way, we were still married when this one came up)Xh called me about a month after he walked out: "Me and (OW) are going to start dating. I just wanted to let you know because I wanted to know how you feel about it." Me: What?!?!?!?Those are just a few.Kathy

Here is one from the OM............ <blockquote>quote:<hr>
Everytime we were done, all we talked about was you<hr></blockquote>Gee Thanks [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img][ March 05, 2002: Message edited by: F A ]

How about this: my estranged W came over while my mom was visiting. My mom was as polite and gracious as could be. Later, W said that was nice of my mom, since W thought mom "just hated my guts." I said, no she doesn't hate your guts, she doesn't understand why you're doing this; neither do I. She said: "What's to understand? I want to live. I don't want to die." And then ran out of the house as fast as she could, while I paced around for an hour, almost shouting "I'm killing you?"

OK, one more from me.WS: I've only lied to you once.I swear I am not making this up. This was after about 10 months of denying that she was having an affair. The scary part is that I think she actually believed this statement.Oh yea - I almost forgot this one. Some of you may recall that in June 2001 I organized a small MB get together here in the DC area. Several of us met for dinner on successive evenings. I brought my (then) 12 year old son on the first evening because we were meeting at Dave & Buster's, one of his favorite places. Afterwards, my wife found out I had taken him.WS: I can't believe you'd take <son> to meet a bumch of strangers from an "internet chat room." Don't you know what kind of harm could have come from that?Me: Hmmm, could it have been as bad for him as the breakup of his family?WAT[ March 05, 2002: Message edited by: worthatry ]

Wow, this is hard... there were SO many ridiculous things she said... how about...WS: "Any fool with half a brain would've known our marriage was over 3 months ago"Me: "Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you said you wanted to work things out... that YOU wanted to find a way. Gosh I'm stupid."
WS: "You're too good for me, I don't deserve you."Me: "Oh, because I was so good to you, I deserved to be lied to, cheated on, life destroyed... thanks!"
WS: "You have nothing to worry about... he's ugly."Me: "He sure is(and a major redneck)!"
WS: "He told me I was pretty."Me: "Well of course he did... let's see, you lost 60 pounds(due do drugs/depression), you dyed your hair blond, you started wearing makeup... and besides that you are pretty! I've told you that everyday I've known you... even when you were 200lbs, didn't wear make up and your hair was natural color."darn it... I may need to stop coming here... too many triggers.

I LOVE this thread.After H found out how unhappy I was before D-Day-H - I thought you were happy with how things were. (Not that I knew how they REALLY were)Me - What about all those times I cried and told you how unhappy I was and how I felt like there was something wrong between us?H - I thought you had a bad day.Huh ?!?!?

My STBX's most recent stupid thing to say was on the settlement papers.........he said we had separated October 2000, instead of July 2001. This is allegedly before he even HAD an OW. Guess he left me within his own mind...it is a stupid thing to say because of course I can prove he left in July 2001....he just wants an early divorce, and we have to be separated for a year before filing here.This one is classic: Me: OW wants to immigrate to Australia...you do realise she is after an easy passport, being with you?Him: I know [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img] and this....Me: She is an NLP expert (a form of brainwashing)...do you know about it?Him: Oh yes, I know EXACTLY what it is (according to the gospel of OW no doubt...)Me: I suggest you look it up on the net under brainwashing, and also fringe cults.Him: Blank stareI am done with him.And I am sorry, maybe where I am right now has something to do with this, but I can't find anything funny about most of these statements [img]images/icons/frown.gif" border="0[/img] Love and light,Jacky

OMG! I totally forgot about this one.. my personal favorite...WS: "One day you'll thank me for this."Ironic thing about that now... she's now thanking me for taking her back [img]images/icons/smile.gif" border="0[/img]

I forgot about this one too.This was during the Affair Excuse "I'm doing this for you" phase:**************************************************
H: Remember when I took you snow skiing and you were afraid to go down that BIG hill for the first time.Me: Yeah ... ?H: Remember how I had to throw a bunch of snowballs at you to get you off your butt, but then you did and stood up and started down the hill and started screaming happily "I'm Skiing, I'm Skiing!"Me: Yeah ... ?H: Well???? That's what I'm doing NOW! ... trying not to hold you back. I'm doing "it" for YOU!Me: <WTF~Ever> ..... Sheeeesh [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img]
**************************************************[ March 07, 2002: Message edited by: Resilient ]

I'm a little late coming to this one, but one thing my wife said on D-Day always sticks in my mind...Me: If you were feeling so guilty, why did you go back to him over and over again?Her: I didn't want him to think I was the type of girl that just does it one time and then that's it. [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img] 
Hello??? I think he wouldn't think that...since you're...MARRIED!!!!!

Oh dear, I forgot one of the biggest things he said to me. He told me that he would tell the ow wench what my likes and dislikes were, sexually. And what certain unmentionable parts of my body looked like. Want to know why he told her such things that should be kept only between a husband and a wife? ....Drum roll please....He told her because he thought it would turn her on?!?!?!?!?Ugh!
Scarlet [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img]

This is a twist on this thread as it's coming from the MOM of OW(me).
I was told this by a friend. Daughters MM is a Mormon Bishop. They must know about A, because he was called in to talk to the Stake Pres. MM told them that he meet Daughter on line(true) and was mimistering to her(false). He had never met her(false). She was just a needy girl(somewhat true) who fell inlove with him(true) and he could not get rid or her(true and false, he persued her). It's over(false). My daughter said about his wife."she's a piece of work and she just does not trust him at all"
My responses, DUH!!!!!!Now this was about 1 1/2 years ago and it's going stronger that ever. Do you think that they would check(no). Do they WANT to know(no). So why don't I tell daughter about this? She would just go to him and he would just say that I'm lying. So much for the family crap the LDS puts out on TV. It's ruined MY family! He made sure she was NOT LDS. She didn't know he was LDS for a long time. He was NOT talking to her about the church. [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img] [ March 09, 2002: Message edited by: gottruth? ][ March 09, 2002: Message edited by: gottruth? ]

I think this is great!My H told me that the OW had nothing to do with why he left.....when I saw his corporate credit card bill....he had made plane reservations for that day to go see her.
He asked if the boys could start visiting him at his "new place"...the OW's new house (she moved here).....I told him that was probably the supidest(SP??) question that he has asked me in 22 yrs! He also only had them at his apartment....(without OW)....3 times in 5 months.
He said he has a "laundry list"....one of the things on the list.....I didn't like to go to the same restaurants as him......are we grasping for any kind of excuse or what???
There are probably more...I just kind of stopped thinking about them.
MAX

I'm not around much anymore, and I'm married to someone else now... but... I'll tell ya... my ex said something that I still can't believe:"We prayed before we did it"He's a Christian (not up to me to judge his heart... but uh... [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img] ) and so were 3 of the 5 women he flinged with. Sheesh!

Something a MM said to me recently....who is having trouble in his own marriage..and knows I'm getting divorced...He came over the other night..like at 1:30 in the morning....he said.."I was hoping to find you at a vunerable moment so that you would just hold me and kiss me" I told the man go home to his wife..and talk to her..

tr, are constantly amazed at the things people do... I never get used to it, but I should....what are they thinking!!!!!!!!!!!!

my STBX said something this wk that I thought was pretty stupid & he doesn't get why I wouldn't do it.I had car trouble this wk & as STBX was in the area I called him. no problem he picks me up & starts in by telling me he didn't know why I had kept the van I should have already gotten a new car,me: i don't have a jobSTBX: i give you enough money, you could still get a new car (yeah, right why am I in so much debt)but the clincher:
You need to get you a car that doesn't have many problems like a Camary. (Guess who drives a one)me: I don't think so, not even if you paid for itSTBX: why notme: I will not drive the same type of car as herSTBX: that is the stupidest thing you have ever saidnow I ask you would you willing go buy a car like the OP?

Ok, I'll take a stab at it.. [seeing one of the ow for 2years, when asked about what attracted him to her..]"I am not attracted to her at all, it was not about the sex. I had to force myself to do it." [img]images/icons/confused.gif" border="0[/img] [and on topic of the second ow who he was seeing for 10months]"We only had sex three times."She later told me they sometimes had sex three times in a day, I guess thats what he meant.Bridgette

This may not be the most ridiculous, but it's the most recent. After telling my WS that I'm ready to sell the house, a issue she has mentioned several times, she said:"We can't, you're suing me for it!"Huh? Doesn't the fact that I want to sell the house indicate that I won't be suing her for it.sad dad