Well ladies,

HE IS NOT THE FATHER......I am so elated...I can't elaborate right this second...we are going to the afternoon service at church....we have to go somewhere and praise God....

I'll check back in and give the details.

God bless you all and remember...even though part of this nightmare has ended for me....I will forever keep you in my prayers...and I will always stick around for whatever reason you all need me to.

I'll be back...

CONGRADULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

CONGRADULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OH WOW! I AM SOOOOOOOOOOO EXCITED FOR YOU!

CONGRADULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HUGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (wiping the tears from my eyes)

I am so happy for you no words can express how glad I am to hear that. I do hope that you do check in once in while cause I have always enjoyed reading your post.

Wish you the best of luck and happy recovery.

Curosisty is getting to me did the H take the test and is he the father???

I can't tell you how happy I am that you got the proverbial "get out of jail free" card.

Go out, celebrate. In some ways I envy you, but I'm so much more happier for you. Take this time and renew it with you and your husband. I wish you the best of everything.

Twiisty

And please, by all means, share more with us when you have the time. I wish I could throw a party for you!

Congrats! I am so HAPPY for you.

Celebrate! Enjoy!

Congratulations Hurt!!!! I am so happy for you. I've heard of this before but with my fertile husband I knew it would not be like this for me from the beginning.

Knowing how you struggled w/ even thinking about C, I am SO glad that you and your H don't have to deal with this.

Not that you even care anymore about XOW, but what's up with that??? She's married AND slept with your H and NEITHER are the father??? or did they never have her H tested. Either she is a real $%&# and deserves whatever she gets OR her H IS the father and they can go about their lives having lived and learned as well.

Wow, I just know how hard all of this was for you and I am just SO SO elated and I'm sure this was a big enough wake up call for your H that this will NEVER be an issue for you two again. GO LIVE YOUR LIFE and be well!!!!!

finally some good new yeah!!!!!!!!!!

I got chills when i read it.

i am sooo happy 4 u

Crazy:

That is such GREAT news. Congrats. What a relief. I'm sooooo happy for you.

I am still so excited, that my head is going to explode...I have a headache right now...but that won't stop me.

I plan on sticking around...I won't go anywhere.

As far as the child...I really don't know. We don't know whether her H took the DNA or not. So I really don't know. My first inclination was to call her after reading the results and cussing her out for making our lives this jacked up for the last year....but that would be unchristian...and totally immature...I'm still fighting it though.

Ladies, I'm the same person, with the same ideas...I plan on sticking around...and being there for you all.

I am the poster child for why DNA is important....remember that....

God bless you all.

crazyhurt,

OH MY GOSH, im so happy for you. how exciting, never again do you have to worry about what to do or what you have to do. wow, there isnt words to express how i feel for you, sooo happy. but i always felt in my heart since you came here that it wasnt your h. it gives me encouragement, hopefully someday we will get the same good news so that i dont have top go crazy over this sith.

yes, you are proof of the importance of having dna, to many woman say man is f just to get what they want, men need to not ever take there word for it no matter what and always have test done. again i am so happy for you. have a great time with your h, somtimes we need somthing extreem to make us stop, im sure your h learned his lesson. and yes, praise god. thanks for the good news, imtswife

This is a good day. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> Change your signature, my friend..

Nut..where have you been? *hug*

Eibrab

Crazy, i am doing the Dance of Joy here still!

Nut, we started to think something had happened to you! please check your PM's on the ezboard!

Ohhhh my goshhhh Crazy!! What wonderful news!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Wonderful news. Think of it this way . . . your family just got a $100,000 raise!

$500 per month time 12 months times 18 years = $108,0000

If $1,000 per month was to be the child support you saved $216,000.

Of course these numbers don't include insurance costs, inflation, the OW taking you back to court for increases . . .etc. etc. etc.

Congratulations again.

wow! Congratulations!

now to fully recover your M!!!!

Thank you all ladies....thank you all so much....the journey continues, but only with less baggage....I'm still here for you all, and will continue to be.

This is one of the best news posts I have ever seen!! I am so happy for you!! I can't say that I am not totally jealous, though. What wouldn't most of us give for this release from the OW and old A issues!

It would be hard not to call/write OW and blast her. But, I suppose she thought it was your H's child. Why would anyone tell their H the child was someone else's if they didn't think so.

Crazy, I bet you could write a letter that expresses you thoughts that would feel good for you and was not offensive. Kind of "buh-bye" letter. I would give it a try. You have earned the right to say your peace and I know you could do it well.

God love DNA testing!

Lbelle - That may be a good idea...a letter...I'll think about it...and if I do...I won't write it this week....it would be ugly.

Or maybe she WANTED OC to be your H's in the beginning. What a nut case to do all she did and not be totally sure. Not that I doubted you about your XOW hurt, but thank God you don't have to deal with that crazy woman for the rest of your life!

I would want to write her a letter as well, but it would probably all fall on deaf ears. She obviously had no concern for your marriage and she may be an old woman before she "gets it" in her own time.

I can't say I'm jealous because our OC is here and part of our family and like any child, I can't imagine any other way at this point, but I am SO DARN happy for you and your H. WHAT are you going to do to celebrate??? You two need to spend some of that money you just saved and go to the beach or something!!!

Don't feel ogligated to stay on this board, I wouldn't want to dredge all of this up if I didn't have to deal with this. But stay on MB and keep working on that M, the best is yet to come!!

Congrats!

Carolyn - - Sending you an e-mail.

E - Sending Carolyn an e-mail explanation. All ok here.

Nut - I'm glad all is ok...we were concerned. We hadn't heard from you in quite a while.

Thank you again ladies....

My H spoke with the attorney...she said that the paperwork has to go to the courts now...if it doesn't reach them before the hearing date, then we will still have to go to the court...I won't mind though...I hope that woman is there.

crazy,

i dont understand why you would need to go. doesnt it just automaticaly drop. they achually set up court date without knowing outcome of results first. cant the lawyer just fax a copy to the courts. or even you would think the ow would just call and have it all dropped. if i was her i would be way to embarressed to show up. im not a lawyer of coarse, but i still dont see why you should have to go to court now. anyway just curious, but in your case im sure your tottally okay to go. i know i would be, again congradulation to both you and your h. sometimes i think it takes somthing big for us to learn our lesson, ill bet your h never does it again. imtswife

The attorney says that we would still have to go.

The OW filed with the child support office and the court for child support...although they are both in connection, they still have their red tape.

The attorney says that more than likely the DNA results will get there ASAP. The case has been retracted, but it has alot of offices to hit first. I'm not stressed, cause I would love to go and just stare her in the face.

I believe he has learned his lesson....he is scared to death...I want him to stay that way.

ETA - These are all Petitions...they must be judged by a Judge.

I am so happy for you. I love it when I hear news like this. I would bet the OW has no clue to who the daddy is.

Do you have anything in writing where she swears it could only have been your husbands? If so, speak to a laywer, she lied!! SUE HER!!!!!!!!!!! I know of a case where a ow swore she was only with the XMM, and he and his wife's laywer was a good one. Had the OW sign some paperwork swearing it could only be his, etc. IT WASN'T. They sued her and won some $$. She was introuble all over the place, with them, insurance fraud, etc. It was wonderful to watch her get beat up by the courts.

OW family was upset at the MM and his wife for holding her accountable for her actions. Funny, how they expected the MM and his wife to be held accountable, but when the tables turned, suddenly it wasn't fair? It was wonderful to watch her get her due.

Check into it!

exactly crazy, it is isnt over until the judge bangs the gavel and stamps dismissed on it. It is definately in your interests to attend the hearing and make sure that it happens. You might want to take Lynn's idea though and see if you can make a petition for costs. The money that you payed out for the lawyer doesnt have to be unrecoverable.

The worst the judge can say is no. <evil grin>

I'm tempted..but as crazy as I think I am for saying this (because you know she didn't give a dang about me or mine, but)...I really do feel sorry for that baby....and any money out of the ho's pocket is food out of the baby's mouth...so, I won't be the nasty one like I want to be.

Lynn - Thank you, thank you, thank you...you really helped me along this road.

crazy,

you trully are a caring and loving person.

i to think you could get her to pay all your attorney costs. but then that would prolong this longer and im sure what you want most is it too all just go away now, i know i would.

yea your h is scared its a good place for him. i believe mine learned to. funny but to be honest i dont think he would had learned or felt so bad had the ow not got pr. sad, but true. he needed this to happen, or i could have ended up moving in with him. the same apts ow lived in. when she told him she was pr no way was he going to live there. i was glad i didnt want to live in that neighborhood anyway, but sad that it took that. that is when he really felt the guilt, before that i think he felt justified because i left him.

i dream about having the same results as you. to be honest i would understand why we had to go through all this, because h wouldnt have felt the pain he caused me. this way he got to feel somwe of the pain.

anyway, im still so excited for you both.
imtswife

Thanks imtswife...I dream that everyone would have these results....not one woman on these boards deserve to go through any of this mess.

I'm going to keep praying for everyone...you never know...there will be other's.

OK but if that was the ow involved in my case i would sue her just to teach her a lesson.

Just like imtwife said unless it gets extreme they never learn a lesson... imagine future or past other women NOT getting involved with a mm because look what happened to so and so or in the past to themselves. WOW what a concept.

Something has to disuade them since morals and the right thing just doesnt do it for 'em

I can really understand what you are saying crazy about not wanting to take food from the baby, that is so sweet of you and it confirms what I have always felt from your post, that you are a sweet person.

A way to look at it tho, that if it did turn out to be your H baby she would not of thought twice taking the food out of your COM mouth.

Forget the extra but at least make her pay for all attorney fees at least. I can see the point some are making, it is getting tiring the way they keep getting away scott free with everything and maybe seeing this will make others think twice. We dont get much of chance to sock it to the OW and if there is a chance you should stand up and at least get a little out of this and send a message to OW

You have a point Cordelia...

More info: My H called me today to say that someone else from the job has walked up to him to ask him about him getting someone pregnant at work (the OW and he work at the same place, different departments though...don't worry, the place is huge...they never see each other, different shifts). Now we knew that she was opening her big mouth prior to the baby's birth...this is the only other time that someone has walked up to my H....she said that the rumor is all over their department...what do you guys make of this? Do you think that fool is crazy enough to continue this rumor with the DNA being out?

I am really tempted to call her butt now....I've been trying to take the high road...my H said that he would inform the attorney....this is close to harrassment. If any of this mess was to get to their supervisors then they both could be fired...

If a supervisor was to question him he said that he would say..."That woman has been spreading that rumor for the last year...it even got back to my wife...we took a DNA, and here are the results....please ask that she stop..."

Could he lie about the sexual contact? Any suggestions would be appreciated...I would like for him to mail a copy of the DNA to her whole department...but it would surely get to a supervisor then.

Question ladies,

Are you all sure that we could even do that? I mean is there something that I could read that would allow us to sue her...he did have an affair, and it was possible...so could we still sue?

I would say it exactly the way you said.....


It is not a lie, she did say that, it is just not saying the whole truth. Only way it would be a lie is if they come right out and ask if there was sexual contact.

This might not be the right thing to do, but if it can right down to losing a job over this, if they asked I would deny it, what proof does she have??? She opened her big mouth so let her get fired for causing trouble. Cant believe that she would even do that with her being married. I would be sooooo ashamed to tell anyone.

I dont know about getting extra money but yes you have the right to at least get the attorney fees and court cost back. She had the right to ask for it if he was the father. So you would have the right since he is not. In any case where you take a person to court if you lose the suit then you have to pay the others attorney fees if they ask and the cost of filing with the courts. Also you can get back the cost for the DNA test. I remember that from our court papers since there was more then one possiable fathers listed.

LOL got a bulletine board at work??? Post a copy on there LOL


Just kidding but wouldnt that shock the poo out of her LOL

That would be soooo gratifying.

Ok its all about he said she said at this point.

Unless he admitted it in court that they had sexual contact because that is just a transcript to prove him lying but if he contends that he is not the father of that womans child and said nothing else then Who said he ever touched her?

I would just stick with that if I were your husband that this psycho lady has a crush and is fatal attracting him.

You can ask for all the transcripts of you court hearings it usually costs about 7 bucks a hearing its just to pay for the copying . So if you want to double check before he adamantly denies it do so.

He needs to deny it if he can.
She may be leaving the company and has no problem getting him fired as well so she gets so sort of warped revenge i guess. Geesh ya should of took her 1000% sure butt on Maury lol i love when they say that and it turns out to be NOT the father.

I agree that response is just fine.

If questioned by a supervisor about the paternity of the child, I would leave out the part about taking the DNA, unless specifically asked if they had sex, because that statement implies that they did have a sexual relationship.

And, yes, go after your legal expenses. I have a feeling that, with OWH being so involved, that this could have been an attempt at a scam on both their parts.

Statement about a dna test wouldnt really imply that there was sex. If she did make a rumor about it, and it got to his wife then of course the wife would really wonder and just to put his wife at ease he could of taken the test, to prove to his wife that the rumor was not true.

The scam thing....I really think so...I told you all before that it is rumored that she has another OC....I bet she has checks coming in from all over the country...HO.

And not to leave him out, my dumb, stupid, retarded H didn't have the sense God gave him to see a ho in action.

Bet he will spot one a mile away now!!!!!

And run for cover!

THAT IS AN UNDERSTATEMENT...:)

I have noticed on my H ... lets say we are at grocery store and run into a woman we know, even if it has been good friend for years, H never looks her in face while we are talking, and moves closer to me, putting his hand on my back or holding my hand.

Some ways it makes me sad that he is so worried what i am thinking when we are around a female and other ways it makes me feel good that he is that scared.

He better be scared....I want him scared...the last time he was brave almost ended this marriage, and changed his life forever....he better stay scared.

AMEN!

i agree crazy,

you are so funny, he better stay scared.

the sad thing is, ill betr there are maany men out there that were told this is your kid, and pay cs without having dna done maybe out of fear, threats from ow or whatever. mayhe her oc is really her h but they achually conned another man. thats scary.

dna, should be a law. men need to have one no matter what. thats the only way the scaming, conniving and manip[ulative woman are going to stop.

you are living proof crazy, you better stay here no matter what, we all need you.

I can't say enought about DNA....ladies, if your H hasn't had one, don't pay one thin dime...GET IT DONE!

It is about time someone got some great news...

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!

Luckly in our state just in last couple of years that it is now the law for any child born out of wedlock that a DNA must be done before there is CS order taken into effect!

It will help men in the future, but in the past..... you should hear some of the horror stories that I have heard. my heart goes out to them.

The horror stories are all over the place. Slutty women trying to get pregnant by men with $$ so they dont have to work.

I think that in these cases, if a man say he wants an abortion and the women doesn't, she should be held 100% responsible. PERIOD. Cause she can get one if she wants, why can't he "abort" the child from his life? We did. No way was some oc going to be in my home around my children to embarrass them.

Lynn,
What happened to the woman who was so happy to meet oc a few months ago?
Did something happen?

That's interesting and admirable, but consider this, the ow in our case didn't give a rat's butt about the food that was taken out of my children's mouths either. I consider it leveling the playing field. I would have sued my ex-h's ow all over the place and still would if I could. My life is disrupted now because of both of them (ex-husband and ow), but it seems she got off easy. Again, congrats!

Twiisty

I hear you twiissty...but can you imagine that baby's life? I mean I can add up the counseling already. That child has a sick ho for a mother....that in itself will get her a get out of jail free card for me.

Oh no doubt. Pitiful really. The OW in our situation has started to wage war again by calling ex-husband and IM'img me wanting to know WHY ex-hubby isn't a part of OC's life. I documented all her stuff to show OC one day if she should come knocking on our door. Mr. T (ex-hubby) couldn't have made it plainer when he agreed for OW to legally change OC's last name from ours to her new married last name. It's something that should have been done since the child was born. From hearing OW talk about her past and stuff, it was history repeating itself. She did to her child what her mother did to her and now she's messing her child's life up by projecting all her feelings and "lefts outs and what fors" onto her child, the OC.

That still doesn't mean I don't want to nail her in court for what she did to me and my children. we're suffering even more now due to divorce thanks to this whole freaking situation. Ex-husband is equally to blame. Right now, the only children suffering are mine because they have to go without again, only more drasticly then when we were trying to make ends meet while trying to work to make the marriage work.

If people actually took the time to learn that actions have consequences, methinks the world would be a better place.

My ex-h's ex-ow got off easy. It's me and the kids who still suffer.

I agree with the others who stated that it would be wise for you make her pay the court costs for her frivilous lawsuit.

Twiisty

Nothing happened. It just is so frustrating to read how these women and their supporters think. Just amazing.

Sure, we met and extended the oc insurance. However, that does not make him family at all. We don't speak to him, dont really think about him at all.

The ow types don't care about anyone but themselves and getting revenge. That is why I advise to fight back and hard. Teach these ow a lesson. I believe that Fathers rights in these situations need to be heard. That is why it is so vital to fight back and hard.