Thanks Orchird.

I don't have it in me to Plan A. It takes everything I have just to make it through the day. Dh has said he would give me some time for me to work on me. Get myself where I need to be.

I don't even know if there is an A. I don't know anything anymore. I don't know what is the truth, what's not. I just know I am tired of being lied to, of always questioning, of second guessing.. I am tired of it. I don't want to do this anymore. I dont' want to be nice to him, I don't want anything to do with him.