Tony,

Dr. Pittman says most of the divorces that result from infidelity are filed by the WS. The have the affair, trash the marriage, then leave the scene of their crime. But he also says the majority of them come back, even after divorce. So even if your wife goes through with the divorce there is still hope for reconciliation.

Of course, much of that will depend if you still want it months or even a year or two down the line.