How long have you been in Plan A? (Sorry if I didn't read enough to catch that)

After 4 months of an emotional BEATING, I decided to go to Plan B. My Plan A was short, but noticeable and effective. My WW and I were separated, which was also another factor.

Here was the mental checklist I went through to decide if I wanted to go to Plan B:
1. If I continue doing this, will I hate / not love my wife TOMORROW?
2. Am I detached and ready for COMPLETE DARKNESS from my WW, and willing to maintain NC with her?
3. Would I describe the situation as "My WW is vacillating between choosing OM or me?"
4. Have I clearly communicated my boundaries, loud enough, long enough, that WW knows them clearly and it will go without saying that when Plan B comes...she will know why?
5. Do I feel that my dignity is so important to me that I will retain it no matter what? If my W comes back and I can have her too, great. If not, I will have my dignity and I can live with that.

Those are some of the things that went through my head in the days leading up to Plan B. If you can apply those and answer yes to all of them, then I'd certainly take a look at exploring Plan B.

I found that when the time came to go to Plan B, I KNEW it was time. Much like when my gut instinct told me my WW was cheating, I KNEW she was. I was right on both counts.

BS (Me) - 33 WW - 31 Married 14 years, together 17 Daughter: 16 yrs old Separated: 12/29/06 D-Day: 2/2/07, EA/PA With Co-Worker Plan B Started: 3/6/07 D filed by WW: 4/18/07 Olive Branch offered (Plan B resumed after): 8/8/07 R Attempt by WW: 9/1/07 NC Established: 9/4/07 NC Broken: 9/5/07, 9/6/07 Status: Plan B, Pt. II (9/10/07)