tfc, the best weapon you have to break up the affair is for you to expose it to family, friends and coworkers. This breaks down the walls the WS and OP have put up around their fantasy and lets in the cold light of day. Like cockroaches when you turn on the kitchen light, the cheaters often scramble and scatter when everybody can suddenly see what they are up to.

Exposing the affair is part of Plan A. Are you well-schooled on Plan A? I'd suggest you do a SHORT Plan A and all the while be fully preparing yourself for Plan B.

But be aware: Plan A almost never, ever by itself breaks up the affair. Plan A is just the setup for Plan B.

You say you want the OW out of "our" life. That's good - but the only life you control is yours. How can you get the OW out of YOUR life?

I am concerned that you are still trying to get your WH to do what you want him to do. You can't get the OW out of "our" life without his cooperation and you don't have that right now.

Again: How can you get the OW out of YOUR life? And are you willing to do what it takes, or would you rather stay with a confirmed cake-eater and fence-sitter and have the OW remain in "our" life?

You will see it here countless times: You can only control yourself. You cannot control a WS and you cannot control the OP. Your WH doesn't want his OW out of his life and he will fight you tooth and nail to keep her there. So, are you going to settle for that, or are you going to take steps to get her out of YOUR life even while your WH chooses to keep her in his?

Me, BW
WH cheated in corporate workplace for many years. He moved out and filed in summer 2008.