Again, MEDC, you aren't understanding what I am saying ... I agreed "entirely" that "IT COULD BE SAID ... " - this was not either of us saying "IT IS MY OPINION". To me, these are two entirely different things: One says "in theory" the other says "I believe". Theories aren't what I live by - I live by my beliefs. I choose not to "rate" our As in order of which was worse. I believe (what I live by) that they were both wrong.

I will admit that when I first came here I had a lot of learning to do, and that I didn't fully see where I needed to just work on me. I have grown quite a bit, whether you see it or not. My H has seen it. I am proud of the woman I am becoming. As this improved version of myself, I have higher expectations for myself and the future of my M. I would like to see my M flourish from all this heartache. And I believe that it can. But in order for my H and I to move forward in our M and make it flourish, we BOTH have to work on the M. I have proven that I am willing to change myself and work on the M ... now my H needs to do the same if he chooses to stay M to me. I don't think that is absurd or out of line.

I stated earlier that my goal today was to develop a strategy for myself (note that it is for ME, not for changing my H) ... that is what I am seeking to achieve here today. I am not going to try to defend myself against your lack of understanding for what was said - you can choose to believe what you wish. I must say, that you seem to only find the negative in me. I have been able to tell for quite some time that you and I have personalities that clash.