See, that is where you are wrong... I do see change in you... change for the better...but that does not mean that you won't be called on things you say or agree with... in theory or not.
Your H will decide what he needs to do. YOU get to decide what you can and should do.... and the whole point of my posts to you is given the can of worms that YOU opened up in his life, I feel that you owe him a lot more patience than you have displayed up until now. Patience will benefit you both...and it will allow you to realize that you cannot control the actions of another... just as your H had no control over your rutting with the OM.
And you are right we do have personalities that clash.... I clash with quite a few people at times...but note to you here... you have clashed with many on this site...even those that have shown a willingness to be patient with some pretty foggy WS. The question is why... and the answers are in your first thread.
Now... I gave you advice before... and it remains the same... be patient with your H and work on you. You have stated that he is noticing the changes...good, you are ahead of the game. Now, keep doing the work and see where it leads him.
Just my 2 cents.