I think you should listen very closely to your best friend, and seek out her advice whenever you can. Ask her if you can lean on her for a bit while you get your feet under you. I'd pay attention to what she says when she's in that blunt mode. Ask her to remind you of today's events if and when she sees a need to, okay?

I think that your husband says he's going to find an IC is another excellent sign of progress. To me, baby steps are just fine in all this.