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So, how do you break through the fear?

YOU do it anyway...speak up...some assuming...YOU are becoming a new person and SO IS your DH...

Well, we hope that he is...

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But he is blowing up at me for no reason lately ...

Can you do me a favor and try to look back on your M and see if there is a pattern of this? Honeymoon, H blows up, honeymoon...

Him blowing up COULD have nothing to do with OW...just be about him! There was a clear pattern in my M, when I was able to step back and look at it from a third party POV...

Come to find out it had nothing to do with me...it was his valleys, no matter what I did, this pattern was going to happen regardless...

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Then he threatened D again

Did you read LA's thread on manipulation? you may want to take some time doing that...if for anything but common knowledge! I was asked ALL the time what my attitude was and I didn't have one either! This is abuse in my book...

Well, from what I've read anyway...read up on verbal/emotional abuse and see if it applies to your sitch...

I see that Longhorn is giving you some EXCELLENT advice...

I see so many similiarities in your sitch and mine...it was SOO hard to deal with!!! I respect your strenght to deal with this...I think that you did the right thing by throwing the threat back at him...

let him know that you will not allow him to do this...in my sitch things got worse and he started throwing things and breaking things...wanted to let you know this in case that it happens you are not surprised and that IT IS domestic violence...

I have to learn the hard way and didn't know at the time that I could call the cops...

For me, things got worse when I started standing up for myself and I just got to the point where I couldn't handle STBX anymore and it was for me that I decided to get out...

FOR ME, it was the best decision that I've made in a long time...

I'm not saying that I recommend you do this...that IS of course, strictly YOUR decision! I'm just sharing! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />


A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge.
Thomas Carlyle