I understand your hesitancy...but I believe it's time you were given all the pertinent information all at one time. It's long past the time to put an end to all the uncertainties and questions about his conduct. For instance, were I you, I’d wonder just how long these little holidays from his marriage have been going on. Frankly, I have a suspicion it’s been far longer than you think...I suspect he’s been living large as a “player” of sorts...but I admit, I’m finding it very difficult to be objective about your husband. I may well be a long way off the mark here...I hope I am.

Anyway, once you have all the information, I advise you to think long and hard about whether to continue working as hard as you have been on recovery. It’s your decision. I think most of us here on MB would be here to support you in whatever direction you decide you will go.

Another thought: I know you and he had an understanding of how married life would be with his career, etc., before you were married...but I’m not sure you had all the facts you needed to make a legitimate compact. I’d consider readdressing several issues about his constant traveling; how he treats and shows respect for his family; how he communicates with you...and when; who he parties with; etc., etc., etc.

Hang in there, okay?