I posted this on the EN board. Maybe it's a better fit for discussion here:

I really should be posting more...I'm sorry that I haven't been. I've still lurked here some and wish that I could help many of you more.

My own situation (for those that remember me from two years ago) improved some, and then improved a lot early this year. Things have gone unbelievably well.

Saturday, it seemed like it all came undone. I felt like she was being overly critical of me, I got defensive and responded with my own criticisms and things got progressively worse. She even said that the reason why I reacted so negatively was because things haven't been as good in the last month than they were earlier, therefore I was quick to snap...and that caught me off guard and I didn't know how to respond to it other than saying she was "reaching a little too far in trying to figure this out."

She is acting like she's over it. We had people at our house all day yesterday, so she had to act nice to me...but she was also fine after that. We watched TV together and shared some conversation and laughs last night.

Mostly, though, I have been very guarded since the fight. I feel like there's a weight on my chest. I'm feeling depressed because I feel, not only back to square one, but maybe further back from that and it's pretty much my fault. I want to fix things; I don't know what to do, what to say, and on some of what she said, don't even know how to make sense of it.


I'm really not comfortable with this.