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I've only got a minute here this evening but I'll try to have a gander at your thread in the morning (that's usually my MB "time"!)
It stinks to go all motor-mouth doesn't it? Especially when you realize it's happening and you're at a loss to stop it! The first time I met B face to face (at a group event - before he ever asked me out) I was mildly interested in meeting him, having emailed with him about geocaching stuff, and having seen the photo on his profile... I didn't know if he was single or available.. and of course if he weren't single or if he already had a GF that would have been the end of that notion... but we chatted for a while with a few others after the event and I could feel myself talking too much and I had to make a concerted effort to stop it. B did the same thing a bit <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
I'd say B is my intellectual equal too - but yes we're from different places so there are enough differences to keep things interesting. He does a specialized job and so do I - neither one is even remotely close to the other - but we're asking questions and learning about what each other does, and that's good. I'd say our IQ is about equal. I think that is very important or one person ends up talking down to the other, and that's not good. We share a weird sense of humour too - that's also a MUST!
I hear you on conversation getting a bit heavy - B and I have had some pretty intense conversations - but that's OK. Each has asked the other if it was too much - neither of us expressed being uncomfortable - so just go with it - carefully of course. Now is the time to get to know one another, and yep if we've got baggage that's going to come to light - as long as we don't get wrapped up in that, and express it properly, I think it's OK to talk about such things - *when appropriate*. I don't dwell on XH - but he is an almost-daily part of my life. B has met him a couple of times and that's all good. I also went into this with B with all my cards on the table where XH is concerned - ALL of my cards. That didn't frighten him off (*I* didn't grow two heads on him!) so then I feel OK going forward without hiding anything or feeling like I haven't told the whole truth.
Good for you on "staying out" where your XW is concerned. If she reads - she reads. You've got nothing to hide. I think you're doing just fine <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
I'll take a look at your thread in the morning - it's nearly quitting time at work and I stopped in here to see what was going on before I start to close it up for the night.
Til tomorrow...
JinGA
F/40, DD15 DS13
M 1989
DDay his EA May 1998.
S Aug 2004.
D Dec 05. I filed.
4/07 Post-D Plan A with 180, with hopes of R.
6/23/07 XH said no to R.
8/24/07 Went on a date with someone new, "B".
1/22/08 Still seeing B, life is good! Learning and growing each day.
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Another new day <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
I'm excited because a friend of mine from HI is here in town and he's taking me to lunch today! I almost never close the store during the day, and I rarely eat lunch unless it's on the fly... this gentleman is somewhat of a celebrity in my industry circles - he's a coral researcher and author. I'd been reading his work for some 20-ish years, in books and magazines and we met about 4 years ago when he came to town to give a talk to our local hobby club, and we hit it off like old friends. He's actually from this area originally but he lives in Hawaii now. Anytime he comes to the mainland he makes a trip home to see his parents and he always drops in on me, usually unannounced. It was kind of intimidating the first couple of times... such a "celebrity" landing on my humble little shop that could always use more cleaning and tidying - but nowadays it's like he's stopping to visit family - come as you are, take me as I am. I love it.
About 6 weeks ago a club member (I'm not a member of said club anymore - although I founded it!) called me to give me a heads up that Dana would be in town the week following a North American conference being held in PA, so I could expect to hear from him. The conference was last weekend, so I've sort of "expected" that Dana would come through the door anytime this week. He called me yesterday and we've got a lunch date today! I believe his lady friend Sara is with him today too - she doesn't come on every trip, but someone who was at the conference said she was there, so I'm guessing she'll come too. She's a sweet lady, we've only met a couple of times, but we hit it off well too.
Dana and I are like old friends who have known each other forever, but we only met a few years ago, and we only get together once or twice a year - we rarely communicate in between visits, but when he comes, we catch up on whatever has been going on since the last time we met...it's an interesting friendship.
For a 'celebrity' he's very down to earth, and I'm very proud to call him my friend. That and I have a standing invitation to stay with him and Sara if I ever make it out to Hawaii.... *sigh* - wish I could go! One day...
So I have that to look forward to today, and can you tell I'm excited about it?!
B really helped me out yesterday too. He finished work early and came by the shop. I'd told him that I was 'expecting' Dana sometime this week and my date was set when B came by. He knew I was in a bit of 'panic mode' to get the shop cleaned up - so he asked how he could help <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> I gave him a task to do, and began it with him and I got busy with customers so while I did that, he tidied away and got things looking good. Whew - what a lift! I thanked him very much and his smile told me that he meant it when he said he was happy to help.
During this time, XH came in for his nightly drive-by - he actually had to run out and do a service call at a client's home, when he arrived I was gathering the things he'd need to take to the client's. When he saw B with his hands in a tank, he laughed - smiled, nodded - hard to explain but as he greeted B his expression acknowledged appreciation and sort of a, "you've been sucked into the vortex" of this business/hobby <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> It was good. B laughed back in acknowledgment and the men exchanged relaxed greetings. Nice that everybody's getting along - and I'm sure that's a dynamic that many people won't be able to understand - but hey, it works for us.
During all this busy chaos, another customer came in who'd ordered 1200+ pounds of aquarium salt (big tank!). He used to have a truck but does not anymore, and he wanted to arrange for us to deliver the salt. XH was on his way out, so he couldn't do it then, tonight DD has a football game (marching band) and this weekend XH is gone camping with the kids... so delivery arrangements might not have been able to be made til next week. B stepped up and said, "Yep, we can take that over tonight!" WOW! So after the customer left, and XH went to do his work, B and I loaded up the 1200 or so lbs of salt (in buckets) on the truck. B went home for a while, but came back at closing time and we went to deliver the salt. We went inside at the client's and looked at his system - he's been a client of mine for several years and I've wanted to check out his setup, but had never had an opportunity before. I was a bit afraid that B might find this boring - but no... he was asking questions and oohing and ahing just as I was <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> Yep, B is definitely being drawn to the hobby... in fact he was digging his old tank out of the attic last night.. he used to keep freshwater fish, now he's going to take the plunge into saltwater... with my help <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
We finished up pretty late as the customer is more chatty than B and I combined (!!!!) so we stopped and got take-out on the way back to my place. Least I could do was feed the man after he did so much for me! *g*
DS is still at XH's and DD was out with her BF and family, we got to the house at the same time as DD was being dropped off. Her BF is such a nice young man.. he walked her to the door and I teased them as I came inside first and told them I'd let them be but I'd be flicking the porch light in a minute LOL! Hey - my kids do the same thing to me! Turnaround is fair play! M gave DD a nice hug as he said good night - they're so cute. Ah young love....
DD had eaten - in fact she brought home leftover Chinese food and we'd picked up Chinese food so there's enough left for lunches today!
The sweetest thing was as DD was saying good night - she was off to bed almost as soon as she got home, she gave me her usual hug good night and she turned to B and said, "Good night, dude!" and she gave him a "Howie Mandel" style hand punch... not sure how to call it but everybody's doing that nowadays. I thought that was nice - she's showing B affection in an appropriate way. He responded in kind. I knew DS liked B from the beginning because DS was the one who encouraged me to contact B in the first place (regarding geocaching/gold panning)... and DS was eager to meet him the first time at the group social we went to, but I wasn't sure how DD was feeling and she's not always very open. This was a big sign to me that she likes B. She's an affectionate person - and that she's showing B some affection is a great thing <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
Well I guess it's time I got moving - I've got a busy day today! DD has a game tonight too, and B will be coming with us to help work the concession stand.
TGIF!
JinGA
F/40, DD15 DS13
M 1989
DDay his EA May 1998.
S Aug 2004.
D Dec 05. I filed.
4/07 Post-D Plan A with 180, with hopes of R.
6/23/07 XH said no to R.
8/24/07 Went on a date with someone new, "B".
1/22/08 Still seeing B, life is good! Learning and growing each day.
Ask me about Geocaching!
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Yeaaaaa! So fun to read about your progress. I'd like to link your story on the Success Story thread. It there one post/thread that tells most of it?
Thanks, Ace Sorry Ace, I saw this post and forgot to reply to it... duh... I've had about 3 threads... starting in about April, when XH's GF dropped the initial bomb that she was leaving and I started to revisit the idea of reconciliation... That thread is here: http://www.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/sho...&PHPSESSID=Then I started a new one after about a month or so: http://www.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/sho...&PHPSESSID=I'd made sort of a bold move at that point... but it fell on deaf ears. Then around a month after that, I had a talk with XH about the state of things, and started another thread based on that discussion... that one has most of the meaty stuff in it. http://www.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/sho...&PHPSESSID=That was where I left off with XH and where I've been at until B asked me out on a date. Then the world turned upside down on me - in a good way. During all that time I've prayed - prayed for guidance. I've prayed for what I thought I wanted - to reconcile with XH but I also asked God to show me what *HE* wants of me. I think I've decided that God is hearing and answering my prayers - just that the answers may not be what I thought I wanted... but He has a plan. I'm still just taking things one day at a time. I still do have intense feelings for XH - I think I always will. However, one person alone can't make it work. I can look myself in the mirror and honestly say I did everything in my power to try to put things back together - in the end, XH did not want that so I have to be OK with that. I'm glad that we are still friends, and I think we always will be. Having gone through the last few months, trying this and that to just see if there was anything left between us beyond friendship, at least I *can* move forward without any lingering doubt about "what if?". I tried, I was clear - there was no miscommunication and I was perfectly clear. He chose no, and I'm OK with that. I think if I had not given it that one more try, I would always be wondering *what if?* So while the exercise may have appeared futile, it wasn't. It was liberating. Now I really do feel free to move on. JinGA
Last edited by JinGA; 09/21/07 07:22 AM.
F/40, DD15 DS13
M 1989
DDay his EA May 1998.
S Aug 2004.
D Dec 05. I filed.
4/07 Post-D Plan A with 180, with hopes of R.
6/23/07 XH said no to R.
8/24/07 Went on a date with someone new, "B".
1/22/08 Still seeing B, life is good! Learning and growing each day.
Ask me about Geocaching!
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Jinga....soooo much fun to read ~ GOOD FOR YOU! I'll check out your threads and link what I can this weekend...if I can find the buried "Success Story for Newbies" thread.
Again....YOU GO GIRL!!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
Ace
FWH/BW (me)57+ M:36+ yr. 4 D-Days: Jun-Nov 06 E/PA~OW#2 (OW#1 2000)
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Whew what a day yesterday!
It was a quiet morning at the shop - only one customer, but luckily he spent a few bucks. Dana (my friend from HI) came in during that and began taking pictures of corals and things as he always does.
We chatted a while and about 12:45 I stuck a sign on the door saying I'd be back at 2:00 and off we went to lunch. Got back in about 45 minutes. XH was at the shop - I'd called him because I had an equipment problem I couldn't fix and he said he'd be in the area because he had a doctor's appointment so he'd come by while we were at lunch. My service technician was also in the shop - her afternoon client had not called to confirm so she was there doing some grunt work <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
We all chatted about "geek stuff" and other things, and then the customers started coming in - like bananas - in bunches! XH helped for a bit, so did my tech - then XH had to go, and my tech helped me for a while longer. At some point during all that, Dana said his good byes, hugs and handshakes all around... and the customers kept coming... I joked and asked him if he was the Pied Piper!
I was run off my feet for the rest of the day - with about a 20-minute lull toward the end. I didn't end up leaving til half an hour past closing time.
I did twice the sales of a typical *good* day. Sheeze if I could do that more often, I might actually eek out a living!
I was tired but it was a good tired. B came by the shop shortly before closing and we went to the football game together. I had gone there to volunteer at the concession stand (working off a scholarship for DD), but they had enough help so we bought a bite to eat and watched our team blow away the other team 45-7 <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
B came over after the game for a little bit. He'd been a bit 'off' earlier and I had asked him if he was OK and he said he was - but the truth was he's got a toothache. He ended up going home shortly after that and kept apologizing for being 'miserable' (he was anything but miserable - poor guy)... I kept telling him he had nothing to apologize for, he'd done nothing wrong. He felt that he had 'ruined' the evening - absolutely not. I felt bad for him - he'd taken some Aleve, but it wasn't working. He had some topical stuff at his home to use, so he cut his visit short to go home and attend to that. No problems here - I just felt badly because he was hurting. Nobody could be angry with him for that but he kept apologizing as if he expected me to be angry.
He actually thanked me for being compassionate about his situation. He told me he's used to getting grief. He said his XGF was never sympathetic if he had injured himself at work or whatever or was in any kind of pain, or if he was sick... in fact she gave him a hard time about it. How sad. He's such a kind and caring man - that he expects to be treated any way but with the same caring that he gives is just wrong... well I just told him to "get used to it" when he thanked me for being so understanding.
Hopefully he'll feel better today <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> DD goes camping with XH and DS (who are already at the campground) today. B and I don't have plans yet for tonight other than we'll get together... I guess we'll figure things out later. I like spontaneity.
JinGA
F/40, DD15 DS13
M 1989
DDay his EA May 1998.
S Aug 2004.
D Dec 05. I filed.
4/07 Post-D Plan A with 180, with hopes of R.
6/23/07 XH said no to R.
8/24/07 Went on a date with someone new, "B".
1/22/08 Still seeing B, life is good! Learning and growing each day.
Ask me about Geocaching!
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Hi JinGA,
Posted the link to your 3rd thread (which has references to the others) and linked your current thread with your new beginnings on the Success Stories for Newbies thread.
Thanks,
Ace
FWH/BW (me)57+ M:36+ yr. 4 D-Days: Jun-Nov 06 E/PA~OW#2 (OW#1 2000)
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Thanks Ace, I'm tagging along on that thread...
A good weekend overall. XH's brother is here on another long haul truck run. I've had a bit of a frustrating day - I had some work to do this morning and he took my extra vehicle to run an errand - but didn't find what he wanted to buy so I spent most of the afternoon running all over H*** and creation with him trying to find this truck accessory he wanted - burned a 1/4 tank of gas and came up empty-handed.
Then my friend confirmed this morning that I was to pick our girls up after band practice at 6:00. Well I showed up at 6:00 only to find out that practice ends at 7:30. I called my friend to let her know practice was over at 7:30 and she said she knew. ARGH. So why did she tell me 6:00 this morning?! (It's usually 6:00 this is the first time it's 7:30.) So now I need to wait another 45 mins and go back to pick the girls up *again* - more wasted gas... ugh.
OK whine mode over...
Talked to B - he had a long day at work but his work seems to be picking up again so that's a good thing. We'll probably go out to dinner (with the kids and their uncle if he's still here - not sure when he's leaving!) tomorrow night.
I think I need a good night of sleep. I've been fighting a cold for a week+ and I've been burning the candle at both ends a bit... plus having a guest in the house I don't relax much - although I died pretty early last night.
I love my XBIL - but sometimes it's a bit of an inconvenience for him to be here. His own brother (my XH) doesn't seem interested in spending time with him or putting him up. Don't get me wrong - he's always welcome at my home - it's just a bit exhausting at times is all. I'm glad that he does visit when his work brings him through here - he's the only member of XH's family that still treats me like family, so for that I'm grateful.
Anyway - my sorta kinda tired/grumpy mood notwithstanding, life is good, all is well.
B is going to a geocaching camp-out this coming weekend, so we won't see much of each other, but that's OK... I've got plenty to keep me busy around the house and the shop. Too bad I can't go on the camp-out but it's quite a distance from here and getting the time off might be a pain. There's a couple of local daytime/weekend events coming soon and I plan to get a bit of time off for those.
JinGA
F/40, DD15 DS13
M 1989
DDay his EA May 1998.
S Aug 2004.
D Dec 05. I filed.
4/07 Post-D Plan A with 180, with hopes of R.
6/23/07 XH said no to R.
8/24/07 Went on a date with someone new, "B".
1/22/08 Still seeing B, life is good! Learning and growing each day.
Ask me about Geocaching!
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Isn't that what half of our posts are? Here's my whine: [color:"blue"] I have to go to work now![/color] Hope it gets better for you today! Ace
FWH/BW (me)57+ M:36+ yr. 4 D-Days: Jun-Nov 06 E/PA~OW#2 (OW#1 2000)
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LOL well I was at Kmart picking up a few things - I don't open til 4 today and thought I could use the solitude to get some stuff done, well XBIL just called as I was checking out to tell me he's on his way back here - no re-load yet.
ARGH!
On a positive side - I treated myself to 2 new pairs of jeans and a couple of unmentionables today - I'm wearing regular sizes (no "plus" or "w" tagged on) for the first time in probably 15 or more years!!!
B had given me a gift card a couple of weeks ago - and I spent it (and then some!)
I was nearly afraid to try on regular sized jeans - but to my shock and awe - they fit!
So I guess I shouldn't complain...
Just got in the door and I have to put my purchases away - Bro will be calling shortly for me to pick him up (he parks the rig behind my shop - only a half mile away) - there's no point in getting into big housework now.
I don't get any more time off til next week - unless you count Sunday morning...
Oh well...
JinGA
F/40, DD15 DS13
M 1989
DDay his EA May 1998.
S Aug 2004.
D Dec 05. I filed.
4/07 Post-D Plan A with 180, with hopes of R.
6/23/07 XH said no to R.
8/24/07 Went on a date with someone new, "B".
1/22/08 Still seeing B, life is good! Learning and growing each day.
Ask me about Geocaching!
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Ahhh I have my house back <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> Bro left this morning for a re-load. He'll be back in a few weeks - or next week - or in a month or so. We never know when he's going to get this way again but it's usually not too long between visits. Usually XH and I share "custody" *g* but the last few times he's stayed with us. At least *nowadays* he calls me to tell me he's coming if he's staying with me - for a while I was the last to know - usually when he just showed up.
Had a nice evening last night. B met us for dinner, he had a long day at work and finished late, and he left us right after supper, but we caught up a bit. He was tired, I could see it on him, but I was happy to see him and glad he came out to eat with us. Things have been a bit hectic for both of us the last few days, but we're both OK with that. We seem to be on the same page with stuff - nobody smothers anybody, and we still do our own thing, but we have lots of commonalities to share too - nice balance.
A friend of mine has a chance to get tickets to a hockey game for half price - my team comes into town in a couple of weeks, so I sent B a text message asking if he wants to go - just awaiting his reply (I don't call him at work - I don't want to disturb him). If he doesn't want to or can't go I may ask a girlfriend to go. My home team only comes into town twice a year so it would be nice to go - I didn't get to a game last year - and my team made it to the finals (lost to Anaheim...boohoo!)
Lots to do here at work - in fact right this minute I'm procrastinating a bit. I've got a load of fish to unpack - they are floating in their little bags right now, waiting for me to release them... I guess I should get to it!
JinGA
F/40, DD15 DS13
M 1989
DDay his EA May 1998.
S Aug 2004.
D Dec 05. I filed.
4/07 Post-D Plan A with 180, with hopes of R.
6/23/07 XH said no to R.
8/24/07 Went on a date with someone new, "B".
1/22/08 Still seeing B, life is good! Learning and growing each day.
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Not much new to report - sometimes no news is good news <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> Everything is going very well. Business is slow, which is NOT good news, but that's the way the ball bounces. I'm stressing a bit over that - but I can only do what I can do, and pray that it's 'enough'.
XH hasn't been around the shop much - earlier in the week I had an uber-busy day, and XH got hung up at work so he opted not to come by, but I dealt with it.
B had some time on his hands yesterday so he came by for a while and helped me with some stuff - it was nice because it lightened the load for me a bit. He made dinner for me at his place last night. Love it when a man cooks! We seem to take turns at that, which is nice. Not every night - but usually a couple of times during the week.
We're going out for supper tonight - my treat. DS is home sick with a cold - the same cold I had - it's making the rounds. DD has an away football game to march in, and my friend is picking her and her own DD up - in fact she's going to the game too - her H is a roadie for the band, so I shouldn't have to worry about picking DD up (although last away game there was a communication bugaboo and I ended up going to pick DD up - but I'm OK with that eventuality if it should happen again). Not sure if DS will be up to joining us for dinner but if he's not, I'll bring him his fave food home. Poor kid - when he gets a cold it's brutal to him. Hopefully he'll be feeling better soon.
It's a beautiful day here - wish I could play hookey and take the rest of the day off - but alas, no such luck!
Oh well, no rest for the wicked!
JinGA
F/40, DD15 DS13
M 1989
DDay his EA May 1998.
S Aug 2004.
D Dec 05. I filed.
4/07 Post-D Plan A with 180, with hopes of R.
6/23/07 XH said no to R.
8/24/07 Went on a date with someone new, "B".
1/22/08 Still seeing B, life is good! Learning and growing each day.
Ask me about Geocaching!
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I haven't had time to post here for a few days - busy busy. Between marching band with DD, work, playtime... I barely sit still anymore!
Everything is still going *very* well. B and I both had some free time on Monday and Tuesday and we did some geocaching in the afternoons.
Big high school football grudge match tonight, B and I are going. XH is picking up DS from his field trip at his middle school next door, and they are going to the game too.
Tomorrow there's a geocaching event (lunch event) so B and I plan to attend that and DS wants to go. DD has yet another marching band competition...
Then next Wednesday B and I are going to the hockey game. My home team will be in town, and a friend of mine was able to get me half price tickets so we're going! I love hockey!
I told B that I'll try not to embarrass him *g*... seriously I'm an enthusiastic fan of my team but I'm not a nut... at least *I* don't think so! I told him I buy the whole seat but I usually only sit on the edge! Can't wait for that! I never did get to a game last year, and my team is kicking booty and taking names!
So that's the latest... things are humming along nicely.
Life was good before - now it's great!
JinGA
F/40, DD15 DS13
M 1989
DDay his EA May 1998.
S Aug 2004.
D Dec 05. I filed.
4/07 Post-D Plan A with 180, with hopes of R.
6/23/07 XH said no to R.
8/24/07 Went on a date with someone new, "B".
1/22/08 Still seeing B, life is good! Learning and growing each day.
Ask me about Geocaching!
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Gooooo JinGA....so ya like hockey, huh? Rock Solid plays hockey and talked about it on the Something thread a few pages back.
If there weren't fights/penalty boxes, would hockey be the same game?
Glad things are going from good to great! Thanks for the update.
Ace
FWH/BW (me)57+ M:36+ yr. 4 D-Days: Jun-Nov 06 E/PA~OW#2 (OW#1 2000)
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Is it *onday again?? Boy time flies when you're having fun.
B and I worked the concession stand for the band on Friday night. We worked like DOGS! B threw himself into it - I can't explain the feeling I got when I saw him giving 110% into a task for my DD. We were both bushed afterward - it was the busiest game of the year and the visiting team fans ate and ate and ate - we ran out of burgers 3 times, drinks 4 times - we had a shuttle running back and forth to the grocer to get more. I'm sure we went through 200 lbs of meat.
After the game, we took DD home. XH had DS with him and dropped him off at home. I told DD how hard B worked at the concession, and she went up to him and gave him a big hug to thank him <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> That was *so* sweet - first time either of my kids has hugged B and she did that all on her own. *sigh* <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
Then Saturday there was a geocaching social event. XH gave me some time off (I've been covering extra for him lately so I felt NO guilt in that!) and B and I took DS with us. DD had a band competition hours from here (my friends chaperoned her with their daughter - our DDs are best friends). DD didn't get home til 2:00 AM (dropped off by my friends - oy!). B, DS and I all won door prizes at the geo-event then we went geocaching afterwards. Dropped DS off at XH's after that.
Yesterday after work I went to B's for supper - he cooked <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> DD had gone to her BF's and DS was still at XH's... we all got home between 8:30 and 9:00.
Back to the grind today - today is a short work day for me as the shop is closed - I have a few things to do around the shop. B has the day off, he was going to go visit a friend he hasn't seen in a while this morning, and we'll likely go geocaching this afternoon.
Have I mentioned that life is good? It keeps on getting better!
JinGA
F/40, DD15 DS13
M 1989
DDay his EA May 1998.
S Aug 2004.
D Dec 05. I filed.
4/07 Post-D Plan A with 180, with hopes of R.
6/23/07 XH said no to R.
8/24/07 Went on a date with someone new, "B".
1/22/08 Still seeing B, life is good! Learning and growing each day.
Ask me about Geocaching!
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Thursday already - where has the week gone?
Let's see... Monday I got stuck at the shop most of the day but got a bunch of loose ends dealt with. B went to visit his friend and spent longer there than he'd planned. So no geocaching that day. That's OK - I had stuff I had to do and he had stuff he wanted to do, so it was all good. We went out for dinner, with my kids and called it a night early because B had to be on the road at 5:30 AM Tuesday for a job a few hours away.
Didn't see B on Tuesday because of long workday for him, and we chatted online for a few minutes early Tuesday evening and he told me he was tired and grumpy from the day's work and being a passenger in his boss' truck <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> He told me before that his boss drives like a maniac. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> He was absolutely not grumpy with me - just let me know he was in a crappy mood, and not up to coming back out again after getting home, so we chatted a bit online and then I went home after work. Nice to know somebody can be in a bad mood and not take it out on anybody else <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> XH made everybody unhappy when he was unhappy - so I'm glad that B could simply be OK with telling me he had a bad day, tell me about his bad day, then go on with life without making mine or anybody else's day bad <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> I'm like that - I can be aware that I'm grumpy - and let the people around me know I'm not in a good mood without acting out on it. Left alone, I get over myself and everybody's happy.
Yesterday, B had a more local job, he finished sometime mid-afternoon and stopped by the shop for a few minutes before heading home. I was busy with customers, he chipped in a bit of help for a few minutes when I needed an extra pair of hands - that was much appreciated, then he went home to do a few things and get ready for the hockey game last night.
He came back to the shop to meet me to leave for the game. XH covered the shop - he's been out sick (again) for days, but he hauled himself out of bed to cover for a few hours so I could go out. That was appreciated too. I'm a bit concerned about XH - he's been sick over and over again - I asked if he'd been to the doc and he hadn't - but that's up to him. If it were me, that sick, I'd go - but hey, not my business right? I told him I hoped he was feeling better and thanked him for covering for me.
The game was great - my team won <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> (The visiting team!). B was cheering for the home team. I wasn't sure if he was 'into' hockey - he doesn't follow it like I do, but he really seemed to enjoy the game and he wasn't too embarrassed that I was waving my flag and cheering my team <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> I warned him that I'd be doing that! It was a good game all around, my team won but both teams played well.
I bought the tickets for the game (got a half price deal on some cheap seats - I'm on a budget!), I paid for the gas, B drove my vehicle (I hate driving in downtown/rush hour), he bought us some dinner at a fast food place on the way down, and snacks at the arena, as well as he paid for parking - so cost-wise I think it was probably about even. I don't keep score about who pays for what - we each offer to pay about equally, which is nice. No need for him to foot all of the bill all of the time, and the game was my idea. I like that we're both quietly aware of who has paid, and step up to pay when we feel it's our turn. Nobody's taking advantage and nobody feels obligated. I like that <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
He stopped by the house for a while before heading home and we watched some TV to wind down from our evening. He's finishing the job he started yesterday, today and expected a short work day. I don't think we have any plans for tonight, but if he wants to he's welcome to come by the house for a while. He usually comes to my place as I've got the kids, I only usually go to his place when the kids are out or with their dad.
Tomorrow night is girls' night out - Bunco. I may ask XH if he'd like to take DS for the evening/overnight - DD has a football game away so DS will be home alone if he doesn't go to XH's. He can spend the weekend if he wishes, and DD has no band competition tomorrow as she has for the last couple of Saturdays so she might want to go to her Dad's too - if/when I see XH later today I'll ask. He had DS last weekend too.
B and I are going to a geocaching event tomorrow late afternoon, another social/dinner gathering, DS wants to come with us, not sure yet about DD, and one of the boys from the neighbourhood asked if he could hitch a ride with us. He older than my kids, actually he's 19, but due to illness he's still in HS and he and my son hang around sometimes. He's a nice kid, and he's welcome to join us also as long as it's OK with his family (seems weird saying that about a 19-year-old LOL!). The event is just a couple of miles from here, and if DS wants to return to his dad's afterwards (and DD if she joins us) then it's all good.
Busy busy - always busy! It's really nice to have a social life again! Between that and shuttling kids for this, that and the other - I'm surprised I have time to sleep!
JinGA
F/40, DD15 DS13
M 1989
DDay his EA May 1998.
S Aug 2004.
D Dec 05. I filed.
4/07 Post-D Plan A with 180, with hopes of R.
6/23/07 XH said no to R.
8/24/07 Went on a date with someone new, "B".
1/22/08 Still seeing B, life is good! Learning and growing each day.
Ask me about Geocaching!
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Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 5,312
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So how'd your geocaching 'date' with B go? Glad to hear you're busy, JinGA.
Ace
FWH/BW (me)57+ M:36+ yr. 4 D-Days: Jun-Nov 06 E/PA~OW#2 (OW#1 2000)
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We had a blast! B met us there, and I picked up DS at his dad's and another kid from the 'hood. We had a great time, and a few other cachers came to find the geocache that's right near my shop, after the event. Took DS back to XH's, and took the neighbour home. DD was at her boyfriend's. B came over for a while too afterward.
Last night XH's brother is back in town, so XH and the kids and Bro went out to dinner, I went to B's for dinner.
Last evening a new geocache was published in our town square - just a couple of miles from here. I emailed B when I got the notice and he called me LOL! (Great minds!)... both of us were too tired to go looking for it last night, but we arranged to meet *very* early this morning before he went to work, to find it. I got there a few minutes before him and I was just signing the log sheet when he walked up! We were the first to find it (that just gives us bragging rights!)
Today B had a short work day, as did I so we went gold panning for a little while this afternoon. Fun! I'd never been but B likes to do that as one of his other hobbies - and I've wanted to try my hand at it since I was a kid. We found a few flakes in the creek in a park not far from here. The water is very low, as we're in a major drought. We had fun - got muddy! I'm home now, just out of the shower in fact, washing the muck off! I enjoyed it very much, B took the time to show me how it's done and I really had fun with it. We'll do it again and I know DS wants to try it - we'll do it again when DS is not in school.
Bro is here until this evening (he went out with XH but stayed at my place). At least he got some time with his brother this visit. DD went to dinner with them last night too - she has been so busy with band activities that she hasn't had much time for her father lately <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> I suggested she stay there Saturday evening as she had no band obligations this past weekend but she opted instead to have a quiet weekend at home - until her boyfriend called *sigh* - she did go over to her boyfriend's (duly supervised by both his parents!) for a while... instead of going to her father's or to the geocaching event with B, DS, our neighbour and me. Oh well - sign of the times I guess, she's 15 <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> I remember it well... and I was *not* the pleasant kid that DD is... so I can't complain.
Busy week ahead - but I have some time off tomorrow, I might go geocaching solo. I'm going to pick B up in the morning he has to drop his truck off for service, but once he goes to work I'm going to go find a few caches on my own - B has more finds than I do, and I'll take the time to catch up a bit!
F/40, DD15 DS13
M 1989
DDay his EA May 1998.
S Aug 2004.
D Dec 05. I filed.
4/07 Post-D Plan A with 180, with hopes of R.
6/23/07 XH said no to R.
8/24/07 Went on a date with someone new, "B".
1/22/08 Still seeing B, life is good! Learning and growing each day.
Ask me about Geocaching!
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Posts: 1,082
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Wow I haven't posted in ages...I'm here... just been busy.
My Mom was in town for 4 days, left yesterday. This is her first stay at my place in over 4 years. Last time she came to visit it was miserable. My marriage was crumbling and XH and I were both miserable (Mom wasn't privy to what was going on), Mom had her own junk she was dealing with... but this visit was WONDERFUL. I've seen her in between, 3 years ago and 2 years ago I went to Mexico to see her - she winters there. We also saw her in March as she was passing through town on her way back home, she had an overnight layover here and we got a hotel room near the airport and the kids and I spent the night with Mom and her companion, but that was just a quick "driveby" and she didn't have time to visit us at home.
So today I go back to my regular routine.
XH covered for me at the shop over the weekend so Mom and the kids and I could spend time together, we stopped by the shop at closing time on Sunday so Mom could visit with XH - she did see him in August when he was on vacation back home, Mom socializes with XH's parents from time to time.
B and I are still doing great. It's 2 months today since our first date - time flies. In some ways it's like we've been together for much longer, but in other ways it feels like just yesterday he asked me out to dinner. Weird - but in a good way.
Mom met B, on Saturday morning we all met up to be first to find a geocache. We found it first together, and Mom is intrigued with this odd sport of ours! We also ran into other players with whom we're acquainted, they were hot on our heels, also trying to be first to find! Then Saturday night and Sunday night B joined us for dinner. Mom approves of him <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> Not that it would make or break my R with B if Mom didn't find him instantly charming and likable, but it is reassuring that she and he got along right off the bat.
Tomorrow, B leaves on a family trip himself, until Sunday. He's taking his Mom to their home state to visit with his aunt and grandmother. His Mom lives in this state but quite a distance away. B has been here since he was about 10 but he was born up north and that's where they are going to see their other family members.
Both of us have anticipated our family visits, but we're both eager to return to our "normal" routine. B came over last night - other than dinners a couple of nights we haven't had any time just for us since last week, and he's leaving tomorrow so we took a few hours where we could get it. I'll also be looking after B's dog here at my place while he's gone (she's a sweetie and she's been here before and my dog didn't eat her so all should go fine!), and I'll stop by his place to check on his tank. He gave me a key yesterday for that purpose.
I'll use the time this weekend (when I'm not working) to put my house back in order. My Mom is tidy but one's house always seems to get upside down and messy when people come to visit for a few days. I'll have lots to do while B is gone.
XH is out of town right now on business, trip came up suddenly but he should be back at the end of the week. So I'm solo at the shop (got to 'pay' for a few days off!), and his b'day is this weekend. Need to take the kids shopping for a b'day gift for him, as well DD's BF's birthday is tomorrow - I think I may have to shop tonight after work.
Not sure how I'll swing that - because B's Mom is coming up tonight and he mentioned dinner also, so I can meet his Mom. I'll figure it out - perhaps dinner first then a quick jaunt out to get gifts. I have more time to get XH's gift, but since DD's BF's b'day is tomorrow it would be fitting for her to get him something on time LOL! I'll work it somehow.
DD and DS have Homecoming this weekend too - so I'll have plenty going on to pass the time.
That's about all the news that's fit to print <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> Life is good - busy, but good!
JinGA
F/40, DD15 DS13
M 1989
DDay his EA May 1998.
S Aug 2004.
D Dec 05. I filed.
4/07 Post-D Plan A with 180, with hopes of R.
6/23/07 XH said no to R.
8/24/07 Went on a date with someone new, "B".
1/22/08 Still seeing B, life is good! Learning and growing each day.
Ask me about Geocaching!
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Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 5,312
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Posts: 5,312 |
I was gonna send out an APB on ya, Jin. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> Glad all is well and busy. That's a good problem.
Thanks for the update. Hope all goes well with meeting his mom.
Geocaching might be a great topic for our 20-90 Something Recovery Vacation OT thread. I think I'll introduce that topic "Strange but fun adventurous hobbies" sometime. Check it out when you can.
Ace
FWH/BW (me)57+ M:36+ yr. 4 D-Days: Jun-Nov 06 E/PA~OW#2 (OW#1 2000)
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Gimme a link to the thread and I'll chime in <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> I've got a few threads that I follow but I tend to kind of skim the rest so I might miss it.
No APB needed... but dang I could use a few more days off... funny how time off can be exhausting!
JinGA
F/40, DD15 DS13
M 1989
DDay his EA May 1998.
S Aug 2004.
D Dec 05. I filed.
4/07 Post-D Plan A with 180, with hopes of R.
6/23/07 XH said no to R.
8/24/07 Went on a date with someone new, "B".
1/22/08 Still seeing B, life is good! Learning and growing each day.
Ask me about Geocaching!
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