To me, it sounds like you are downplaying the TRAUMATIC and HORRIFIC NATURE of an AFFAIR.

But maybe, without having an affair in the past, talking to some female at work would be a non-issue and then there would be nothing to get into trouble for…. I know that I created conflict by having an affair. I am not blind to that. DID have an talking to a FEMALE at work is A MAJOR ISSUE...A TRIGGER..tearing into her H does MUCH LESS, and I feel HURT sometimes.

Do you recognize the EXTENT of THE WOUNDING that your having had an affair has done to her..and that you must continue to work on REPAYING her and helping her to heal?

I made it happen..a joyful life..filled with peace, contentment, happiness and fabulocity.