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Not me. That wasn't even on my radar. But I have seen this IRL. The fact that your H (xH?) thought that stealing money was ok tells me that he is a jerk and probably always has been.

And having an A is not being a jerk?

My H has always told me i was "too honest" because i would give back money if i did not received the correct change or things like that.

I always ask him "is there really such a thing as being too honest?"

As has been posted on this thread and many others usually the BS does not even know things are as "bad" as the WS perceives them to be.

What makes someone who becomes a WS not feel they can talk to their spouse about it rather than go have an A especially those who have been married a long time?

I do not think i am better or have better character because i have chose not to become wayward. However i believe that there is some feeling of "entitlement" or something going on in the waywards mind.

In my sitch, it think that way more of my needs were not being met than my FWHs and for a very long time (not saying that his weren't but mine weren't either) and i have not even considered having an A. Even with all the things that have happened in our 25 years that makes me feel "entitled" to have one I have chosen not to.

So what is the difference, is it character, is it entitlement, is it selfishness, I do not know.

Last edited by Still_Crazy; 04/25/09 08:38 AM.