I guess it's a matter of perspective. You say you are a failure at work, yet you have a job. You keep the job. You bring home a steady paycheck. You do not feel entitled to a bigger job without doing the requisite work. You do not belabor tasks that you think are "beneath you". You seem to work and play well with others.

From my corner of the world, I don't see that as a failure. I would have been beyond happy with a spouse who did that. (I would have even been happy with a SAHD spouse--I had the earning potential to support the family.)

So in whose eyes are/were you a failure? Yours? Mrs. Hold's?