I really think so much of her rejection of you has been a rejection of herself.

Perhaps there IS reason to hope. she may just feel better about herself and therefore more able to engage in her marriage.

It probably helps that you have (inadvertantly) left some of the pacing of closeness be determined by her.

Perhaps by withdrawing, you are seeing what amount of closeness she wants to pursue on her OWN.

I have long thought that if I could leave off my husband for a good long while (what feels like TOO LONG FOR ME), then I might see him swing back towards wanting to initiate all sorts of things.

But for you and me (people who long for closeness/physical intimacy), it can take going into withdrawel to give our spouse the space they need.

I think both our spouses feel smothered VERY EASILY.

Me 42
H 46
Married 12 years
Two children D9 and D4 !